What would you do??

OK I'm not looking to be judged but answered...

OK I have been married to my husband for 1 and a half year. and well it is all turning sour. I'm gonna use first name for ea. person because I wanna ask anonymously! OK well Josh is my husband. Andy is a guy I have known since I was like 14 and I'm 19 now. And Chad is Andy's Brother! OK got it! well before I met Josh I used to hang out with Andy just as a friend ONLY! and he was pretty cool. well then I met Josh about a year after not talking to Andy. and Me and Josh ended up having a baby February 19th 09 and we got married while I was preggo Jan 3 2009. well Josh was a d*** to me all through out my pregnancy and he would do all the drugs you could think of and he drank A LOT! and at one point hit me with a truck in my early pregnancy! well we were going good and everything, and then I decided on my face book to look up Andy. I couldn't find him, but I found his brother Chad. Chad was way sexy! and I ended up talking to him and flirting with him and also texting. I have never cheated but.. I was being flirty with him and he is a really good guy, like very successful. He has a 14 hour a day night shift security supervisor, a nice 09 ride, a ford truck. He is the most amazing person I have ever met. well he was texting and asked if I wanted to hang out with him at his work, I know his whole family I just never really remember meeting him like he says. so anyways he ditches work and comes to pick me up. He is really sweet. we get to his work were just walking around talking thinking how weird it is we never met. I would have noticed him if I did meet him, oh yeah, 6 pack, way buff. umm yeah the whole package! anyways we went into the building and was just sitting there and I was like acting weird around him and he leaned over after being at his work for like two hours and said "do you want me to take you home yet?" and I said "Idk." and he was leaning so close that I just started kissing on him and yeah it happened. I cheated. It ate me alive and I went home and told Josh and he laughed and said its OK that he cheated on me a year ago with a fat chick! wth! so I told him yet he kept it from me for a whole year! He is in jail right now for hitting me the last time I'm going to let him and me and Chad have went on 3 dates so far and I really like him its just crazy.. Josh cheated on me without telling me. we were both wrong but how did it not eat him alive? anyways my question is what would you do? Chad does not drink, drug free, his ex is like way pretty and so I don't think I stand a chance and I guess he left her cause she cheated on him. anyways they also have a 3 year old daughter together and I have a 1 and a half year old with Josh. me and Chad just kinda hit it off. what would you do? I'm so lost. I don't know anyways thanks!

Updates:
also what kinda things go on in a mans mind? also Josh is 27. chad is 28.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • I think you need to determine what you're going to do with your marriage first before you begin a new relationship. Once you determine that then you can focus on other things. Right now, you're lonely, vulnerable, a single parent and crave attention. There is no way to know that things will work out with Chad because it's too premature.

    Once you decide the fate of your marriage, focus on yourself, what is best for your child and preparing the future. Those pieces alone are incredibly more vital than seeking love. I am referring to making sure you have a stable job, a source of income, a home, childcare, medical insurance, etc. You're an adult and a mother so let those be the priorities.

    The decision is yours.

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    • I'm in the middle of getting a protective order against Josh, because of his violent past I have to is what DCFS said and She is the most important thing to me right now. I have a stable Job with heath care benefits, I have lived in this same apartment for two years now too, but I get what your saying and you completely helped me. I do feel kinda crazy being alone after having Josh here the last 3 years of my life. Divorce cost like $310 here. I guess just do what I'm doing and c what happens.

    • That is excellent! I am very proud to see that. Just one thing though, the flling of the divorce paperwork might be $310, BUT it might be more because the lawyer has to complete division of assets, custody of your daughter and present it to the court judge. If it's included in that amount then that is by far the cheapest divorce I have ever heard of!

      Good luck to you.

    • Well my grandma got a divorce free somehow I remember just don't know how. She did the paperwork from some website and printed it somehow she said its free idk. The guy said they have free lawyers or whatever for me since I am under 21 I am not sure though I find out Tues. but whatever it takes I don't care.. I just need to get him done with! you helped me so now how do I delete this question lol new to this!

What Guys Said 2

  • Im assuming you are not going to work on your marriage, correct? If so, please end it and move on. If Chad is the guy you want to be with, then get out of the marriage and pursue what makes you happy. Marriage is a serious business so if you can take care of that first, then please do so. Good luck to you!

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  • your an idiot

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