Does anyone here still believe in saving sex for marriage?!

Seriously, people look at sex and don't think anything of it anymore. Its become like a daily routine for some people. And then people wonder why they have relationship problems dealing with "i thought they loved me" or "they cheated on me with my friend" or "Now that I've given them everything sexually, what else can we do?" Its one of the biggest problems with basically every relationship now-a-days. And, yes, it is socially acceptable, but does that mean its right?

So my question is this. Does anyone believe in saving sex for marriage? Why or why not?

  • Yes, I believe in saving sex for marriage.
    57% (16)22% (2)49% (18)Vote
  • No, I think its fine not to save sex for marriage.
    11% (3)22% (2)14% (5)Vote
  • I don't think it really matters.
    4% (1)33% (3)11% (4)Vote
  • I think its fine if you dont, as long as you wait for the right person.
    25% (7)23% (2)24% (9)Vote
  • Other
    3% (1)0% (0)2% (1)Vote
And you are? I'm a GirlI'm a Guy

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Yes, I believe sex should wait until marriage! I plan on staying a virgin until my honeymoon ; ) (at least try)Then I'll know it's the right time, and the right person and obviously not have any doubts or regrets.because I'll be married to the person who said a vow to cherish and love me the rest of my life ; )

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    • Thats great. I plan on doing the same and I'm glad you feel this way.=]

What Guys Said 4

  • I believe that people should do what they want as a couple and in a relationship as long as they are willing to accept the consequences and take the precautions necessary. A relationship is about two people being able to make decisions and live as one.

    The question you ask ."does that mean it's right?". right and wrong are relative terms, just ask a Muslim extremest and a conservative about right and wrong. ask a starving homeless person and a Gucci wearing executive what right and wrong are.

    I don't think that it's right or wrong. it's right when two people consent, it's wrong whenever one of the people in the relationship doesn't want it.

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    • Yes, I definitely think you make a good point and I respect your opinion. Your definitely right, it is their choice. I guess my question was sort of more pointed to whether YOU personally believe it is okay, in YOUR life. ^ - ^ But I thought in general you made a very good point. =]

  • Personally I think waiting to see if you're sexually compatible until after you've tied the knot is completely ridiculous. Sexual compatibility is a big deal for me, so I want to find out of the relationship is going anywhere as soon as we're ready. Similarly, I think people should live together for a year or two before getting married. Just because you have a great relationship doesn't mean you can deal with each other on such a close bases every day for the rest of your lives. Some people just aren't compatible in that sense, no matter how great everything else may be. The same can be said for sex, spirituality, values, etc.

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    • Thank you for your comment, I appreciate that you stand up for what you think about this matter! =]

    • Marriage! rest of your lives! WHAT MARRIAGE LASTS ANY MORE. Its like it means nothing to kids anymore.

  • Sometimes. I believe more in saving sex for a relationship that REALLY means something to you. Like, don't have sex until at least 2/3 months have passed. (Assuming there have been lots of dates during that time period).

    You're right, many humans may say, "Oh sex means nothing", but all that is doing is lowering ourselves back to the mentality of apes. We've become more lustful.

    People just. Don't. Care. Anymore.

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    • I agree, people definitely don't care really care anymore and its really sad. And frustrating. But only after 2/3 months? Even if you have lots of dates, do you really think that is enough time to get to know someone enough to share your body with, which should be treated as a sacred thing.

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    • Im not saying that you have to look at it with a religious view, sorry if I came off that way.

      But it is a shame that most churches have gone the wrong way with religion and make it seem like something its not. A lot of places say if you do something wrong, like sex, your definitely going to hell, and that's not what the Bible's message is at all. They definitely shouldn't have done that to your family and I'm sorry that they did! ^ - ^

    • Thanks, that was nice of you to say. Oh, also, I didn't think you meant I HAD to look at it that way, I was just pointing out how I do.

      : )

  • I believe in it , unless you find the right person.

    Therefore I haven't yet , and it really doesn't bother me. Just a shame that sex is now the focus of most relationships these days. Shame in my opinion, id prefer it to show how much you care for one another, now it means nothing.

    Note:I must sound like an old man or something xD

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    • I think that it is definitely a shame that it means nothing. Relationships should be more than about sex, and if you end up being with someone just for sex, than its going to end bad. Because when people get older they aren't going to be having sex as much (maybe not at all) and so you need someone you can just be with for the rest of your life.

      Note: you don't sound like an old man ^ - ^

What Girls Said 9

  • Well, here goes my opinion.

    I saved myself for marriage. Well, guess what, it didn't work. Not sexually, emotionally, or in any way shape or form. I spent 5 years with a man I despised from the first week of marriage, because I didn't believe in divorce, just like I didn't believe in sex before marriage. I have real strong feelings against our puritan heritage and the issues the catholic church has tried to push over the American culture.

    Saving yourself for marriage is a wonderful concept. I just don't believe its practical in our society. A woman who has had sex before is more aware of what kind of bull**** is being spoonfed to her from guys. Yeah, there are still awesome guys out there, but there are more who will steal, cheat, and lie to get what they want in a one sided relationship. Same goes for chicks as well.

    I do not believe sex is "the biggest problem with basically every relationship now-a-days." If I were to generalize in such a manner, I would say it has to be more that people don't realize when their personalities don't match. They have different morals, goals for the future, or don't understand what it takes to make a relationship work. Sex has a tendency to confuse these issues. Girls are raised to look at sex differently than boys. Yeah, there is the whole hormone thing too, but lets be honest. we want our little girls to be prudes.

    So, yes I believe in sex before marriage. It's part of figuring out if you match in that way. Yes, you should be selective in who you sleep with, but also, I think it is part of being a healthy adult. If you deny yourself sex, I think you lose a little bit of yourself to that sacrifice. I hope that made sense!

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    • You definitely made sense and I respect your opinion. I really feel like you've thought about this topic well and thank you for your post. =] And I'm sorry that that happened to you, but I don't think/ know if that happens to everyone that saves sex for marriage, though. Anyways, I'm sorry that it happened like that for you! ^ - ^

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    • Well said, I think it's funny how people can honor their religion and save their virginity, but have no problem getting divorced.

      Just for kicks:

      "What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder."

      "But I say unto you, That whosoever shall put away his wife, saving for the cause of fornication, causeth her to commit adultery: and whosoever shall marry her that is divorced committeth adultery."

    • Eh that doesn't really mean that if you divorce then your sinning but that if you divorce and remarry or if you cheat, then that's a sin.

  • I believe that each person is entitled to their right to do with sex what they want and what they feel is right. Lets be honest, the people that go out and just sleep with everyone, are not hurting you by any means.

    I'm going to be honest when I was younger I felt that sex was only for people that meant the world to each other. I did it for the first time with my boyfriend of 8 months, when I was in high school. We were together for over 5 years after that. But as I grew up and started seeing the world more I came to realize that sex isn't an emotional thing. Don't get me wrong I don't go out and sleep around, however to me sex and love are not tied together. Yes, I have sex with people I love, but it is secondary to my feelings. And sometimes I sleep with people that I don't love, but there is an understanding that the sex is just for fun, not for anything else. Sex has never had an impact either way on a relationship of mine.

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    • I wasn't saying that people that sleep around with everyone are hurting me, and I'm not judging anyone by anything they do. Its your body to do with what you like. ^ - ^

  • yes I do think about it if the guy your get married to had been with another woman wouldn't you be worried he would think about all the past woman he slept with? I know I would same goes for a girl. So if the two people saved themselves for each other then there is a huge connection plus one person isn't as experienced as the other but I do agree with the people below its all about what you wanna do :]

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    • Yeah the makes sense. I think you have a good point! =]

  • I for one am definately saving myself. Although it's mine to give, it really doesn't belong to me. I made that promise in truelovewaits when I was young and I'm sticking to it. And yes, I'm a Christian.

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  • I believe in saving yourself for marriage for several reasons... you and your signifigant other will be able to share something very special.. less std's to pass along. (not saying if your married you CANT become infected with an STD but if everyone were to save thereself for marriage and have a monogamous relationship then yes, there will be less infected people)... It is pretty much in every holy, Godly book... such as Qu'ran ... Holy Bible etc.. Pretty much it is the right thing to do!

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  • i think it does matter, I've been raised a certain way and believe a girls morals come first. with todays society it might be difficult, there is a loot of pressure believe it or no but it is such an intimate matter that it should be saved for the person you are certain you'll (hopefully)spend the rest of your life with and that can only be done after marriage!

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    • Yeah, there definitely is a lot of pressure around this topic! Thank you for your opinion! =]

  • heck yes I'm saving myself! there are many reasons with the main one being I'm a christian.

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  • Yup- saving sex for marriage is the best thing you can do for yourself and your future husband/ wife. you can save yourself from a lot of heartbreak, STD's/STI's and the sex tends to mean a lot more (this is all just my opinion)

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  • I see that this first got posted a month ago and I am amazed at the poll. Looking at that you would think we have a majority of non married virgins around. Of all my girlfriends, casual or remote I know of none which have not had a d**k in them. I am not including the married ones in this either.

    Just read other polls and questions on this site and see 13 14 year old kids having sex already. It is absolutely crazy.

    Go to any given high school and I would bet that over 80% of the seniors have been sexually active. What a shame

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    • According to statistics, the median age of loss of virginity in the Western world (US and Europe) is 17 years 1/2, girls being a few months earlier than guys.

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