I have been married for 10 years and my wife shows no affection. We do get along good but we are more like roommates. We both have careers and we also have three children. I can count on 1 hand the number of compliments she has given over the last couple years. She almost never touches me, I am not talking about sexually touching. I am not the stereotypical husband either. I cook almost every night for our kids, have a good career, clean the house, exercise, give her numerous compliments, listen to her, etc. I am not perfect but I have really tried to be a good person/husband. I even had us go to marriage counseling to talk about our differences. She did not feel comfortable talking to the counselor so we stopped that. My problem is that life could be so much more enjoyable and I have told her that I need some affection. I am not being dramatic all I am needing is simple verbal and physical affection I am not sure what else to do at this point. The strange thing is if I initiate sex she has no problem receiving and fully enjoying it.
Most Helpful Girl
have you ever thought maybe she has changed?
From my personal experience with my marriage, it's sort of like that.
well, I'm sure she does some things with the kids and cleaning around the house. PLus you said she has her own job too.
As for me, I quit my job to live with my husband. I do all the errands (pay bill, grocery shop, finance, and cleaning + cooking). I am trying to look for a job, but no luck as of yet. I have a BA so my husband doesn't want me to flip burgers. Anyway, we don't have kids but we have the two problems you say you do with your wife.
-I don't really give him verbal praises which he only gives to me, and he gives it a lot
-I don't really like to touch him/hug or kiss him. Which he does it a lot to me.
Why is it that I don't? There's a lot of reasons. One is I'm just not the touchy feeling type. I never wanted or had a boyfriend. He was my first at the age of 24, and we got married right away. I just felt pressured to marry because I was getting old and all my friends/relatives pressured me to... so I got married to a nice man. I feel like marriage is just two people being roommates and as long as they get a long, why push it? So yeah, I guess I do all the laundry and we eat together all the time but I'm beginning (just today) to think that. Maybe I should just do MY laundry and we shoudl just eat seperately and make our own meals ourselves. I think we should be two seperate people just living together. It'll help us to be more independent and stuff... that's just me though. I'm NOT saying that your wife is like that. You should just talk to your wife, about things like her wants and her needs and her desires... get her to reveal what she likes and is happy or content with.
Its all up to you to find out what's in your wife's mind and what kind of person she is and why she is that kidn of person. you need those answers and you have the opportunity to do it, and you are the one she needs to talk to about these things. counselors just some times are there, for the talking to encourage you to talk but if she doesn't want to then it's not goign to help. So I would just suggest you and her talk more, and talk about this issue specifically.0