Separated after 8 years of marriage

Hello guys, I've recently found myself separated after 8 years of marriage and back on the dating scene again. My questions is when I'm in a bar or club and meet a girl that I like, should I let her know that I'm separated with 2 kids or should I just say that I'm single? I'm not sure what to do. Based on my previous experience, I've chatted with at least 2 girls, but from time that I mention separated and kids it seems that they're no longer interested in me. The point I'm trying to make is that they are not willing to get to know the person more. I don't like to lie, but could it be viewed as just withholding information if you don't tell them?

I was also thinking that it might be better to say that I am single and after the first or second date when they've gotten to know me then tell them the truth and give them the reason why I stated I was single. I would appreciate some feedback.


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Most Helpful Girl

  • I don't think there is anything wrong with simply stating you are single. The right girl will understand and be happy with the rest of your story, when the time is right to share it. Until you know you're interested in a woman and she's interested in you, there is no point going into details.

    The advice above applies to girls you meet at bars and clubs. Girls you meet elsewhere (church, bookstore, dog park, etc.) may be more likely to roll with that right off the bat. Girls at bars are in a different state of mind, I think.

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What Girls Said 4

  • For starters, most bars have single young women 18 - 25 round abouts. Its nice to go for youthful young women, but if you are looking for someone who will understand your situation, I think you are looking in the wrong place. It depends on what you are looking for. Most clubs and bars, you might find a one night stand, but if you were to get involved in some other activities in areas you are interested in, you are more likely to find people you relate to, similar ages etc. There are plenty of women out there that will accept your situation, they just might be in the same situation too.

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  • So you're separated, not officially divorced? I can tell you why those two girls are not interested. Divorces are okay, but a guy who isn't officially divorced? And two children to care for to boot? These girls are looking for relationships, not drama. No woman wants to be with a man who is still tied down by that sort of thing. Truth hurts, but there you have it.

    Hold off on dating until you are officially single. You need to concentrate on your children and on divorce. You've got things to work on before you should be back in the dating game.

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  • Say you're divorced and then after a while or if she asks, then say you have kids. It may help a bit.

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  • Dating sucks...if you know for sure you are getting divorced it is pretty much a done deal...tell her your single. Don't get too personal...not at first...get to know her...then tell her all the details.

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What Guys Said 0

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