When is it safe to talk about marriage with the guy you are dating?

I just started to date this guy I've been talking to for a month, we have lots in common and I want to tell him about marriage so I don't waste more time in a relationship that is going no where I'm 24 and before I know it I'll be 30 and still single....


Most Helpful Girl

  • You don't want to scare him away just let it work its course you still have 6 years until you are 30 and if he's the one he will still be there!


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What Guys Said 4

  • You are dating a guy for only a month and you are gonna start talking about marrying him already? I don't understand what it is about people in general for the need of titles and labels just as a social status or a social phenomenon. If you are comfortable with who you are or who you are with, why need the urge for "getting married" just for the sake of it? Especially after a month, just because you fear you are gonna be 30 soon you wanna start talking to a guy you've been dating for a month about marriage? Do you even know him enough to like him, to love him that much that you would wanna wake up next to him for the rest of your life (or until you realize that you made a mistake and get a lawyer) ?

    Just enjoy the ride and the company for the time being and see if he is really showing his true colors and that if you can stop obsessing about your age and the marriage as a social status only.

  • Well it's important for women to get married earlier guys, it's difficult and dangerous to have children after a certain age.. and being young enough to watch them grow up is a good thing.

    If you aren't able to talk with him about any topic, starting off with marriage will most likely distance him a bit. Find topics to discuss to see if he is open about analyzing situations and thoughts/feelings with you. If he is able to do that, then it's safer to bring up marriage as a topic earlier on in the relationship. Also, don't make the marriage discussion about you and him, guide it into a discussion about marriage in general. If he realizes that you just want to know what he thinks about it, that would make him feel more comfortable. Maybe talk about people from your family, or stories you've heard about couples and the different amount of times they took or success stories. People often unknowingly do a checklist - yes/no - to topics when they are stealthfully introduced like that.

  • It's better to do it soon. You can let him know that it's hypothetical, so it doesn't scare him off. But ask him whether he thinks being married to someone is in his future. Then, if he asks you why you are asking, you can tell him.

  • Haha, whatever you do don't bring up marriage if you haven't been him for I'd say... at least 6 months minimum. You're just going to end up making him think you're desperate (which it sounds you are), or worse - scaring him off completely.


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