OK. Am I the only one that gets offended or find it insulting when men act like getting married only happens when they "surrender" and have nothing else left to do and want kids so "I guess I should get married". Why do men act like they don't want it to. No man wants to be the old guy and the club, lets be real ! So why do men act like marriage is so bad.
Why do men act like marriage is a death sentence?
What Guys Said 14
Marriage is all good when it works but now days with the ease and benifits of divorce for women and the increase in female promiscuity and not knowing what the words "TILL DEATH DO YOU PART" mean, it's has turned in to a really bad and sour deal for a guy.
In Marriage a woman can claim abuse and have the man sentenced without evidence.
In Divorce a woman gets the following:
Her income and half her partners income in the form of alimony based on how long they were together, in addition to that she gets to stay in the house and the ex husband has to leave until she finds another place or sells the house for her equal ownership value in cash. If they have been together for 10 years then the male has to pay half his retirement fund to her and 50% of whatever he makes until he drops dead. As long as the woman doesn't re marry she will continue to get alimony which means she can get another partner and live as a family unit with her children and new partner funded by her ex husband.
When it comes to children the woman gets priority over the man in keeping the children which almost always happens because of the child support money the woman gets. Which they also always take. Just because it's child support doesn't mean the woman has to spend it feeding the child. There have been a few cases where the woman had left their child to starve to death whilst spending the money on themselves, but these were not enough to bring around forced itemization where the mother has to show reciepts of the money being spent on the child.
Child support is years of payments per child until an agreed upon age which may include college and must allow for the childs life style to go uninterupted same with alimony. These payments are based on the total yearly income of the ex husband before tax and alimony.
When it comes to visitation rights for children mothers are prioitized and fathers are ignored, in addition to that the woman gets to state the terms, times and conditions of the father being allowed to see his children. In many cases the mother can refuse the father the right to see his children and the courts will do nothing to help the father. In a case a few years ago a mother had put her children up for adoption without informing their father whilst still collecting child support. Sadly the father found out too late and was not allowed his children back because the time period for him to object had past without him knowing.
And you wonder still knowing all this why men don't want to get married?
- Show AllShow Less
Men love freedom. It's a huge part of what makes us feel comfortable and secure, knowing we can do what we want when we want to. If a guy says, "OK I will give that up to build a single life that we both lead together" then it's an incredibly deep and loving step he's making for that woman. But that doesn't mean he's not going to mind losing his former lifestyle. Change is difficult for everyone, even women. A lot of us just have a dark sense of humor too. I fall into that category.6
- Show AllShow Less
Why should you find this insulting? It is nothing to do with any particular woman, it is the institution as a whole that doesn't work. Lots of guys will make an informed choice not to take those risks. "It might work out ok" is completely insufficient assurance.
It is absolutely nothing to do with the patronising cr@p about peer pressure in the ridiculous "best" answer.
Your conduct towards each other and your kids is all that matters, not somebody else's idea of how things should be formalised between you all.
- Show AllShow Less
okay simple answer... peter pan dies... and mr brady takes his place... :) you give up all the joys of be wild and free to become a grown up. Most men don't hate it... Anymore than women do.. But it's a trade off... Like leaving school and getting a job it's a turning point... I mean we all wish we could go back to school or be a kid again... Same thing... Don't read too much into it... Men are way easier to figure out then you think.. :)2
succubus leave us alone. I think if I don't ask please don't ask me. I don't believe in church or state so why do I have to go to them to profess my love. Its bullsh*t to me. That's why I'm scared. Cause I you came at me with that I would wonder why you don't know me enough to leave me alone with that crap.2
- Show AllShow Less
it's not that bad, at least for some guys it's not. I like it personally. if the women have something good to offer.0
So... I've been happily married for over 10 years. Looking back, I regret nearly every second of it.
Sorry this is months late. I'm curious how you feel about it now.2
I'm 43 and been happily married for 13 years. I think my wife is great.3
umm no its not a death sentence, its a life sentence2
beacuse it takes the broad horizon they have and makes it very narrow and time consuming to get out off its as simple as that0
I'd like to meet the guy who invented sex, if only to find out if he is married.0
If you find out your living with a deadly disease have a bunch of kids and your wife doesn't see the importance of living a healthy lifestyle it's a death sentence. No way around it even if you get divorced your still done for0
Its because the night after she becomes a nagger, puts on weight, and is always too tired for having sex.4
What Girls Said 6
I don't know about death sentence.
Most of my cousins and my older sister are married and quite happily so. Some of them even have a few children.
My sister's husband has never acted like being married was a death sentence, if anything. Yeah with divorce rates being what the are, and from personal experience (being a child of divorce myself) I can see why men aren't so eager to marry women anymore.
Back in the "good old days" when people hardly got divorced, it's because it was frowned upon. Hell in some countries it's still frowned upon. Because women in those countries and men in those countries worry more about their reputation in society as "partners", if they got divorced, the community would speculate and the last thing the couple wants is it becoming a public affair.
My mother divorced my dad and seriously, hijacked his fiances like no one's business. She lied, she stole, and she whined the whole way for cash (because of addiction reasons, I won't go into it) which she pissed away on herself. Child support was basically her fun money.
So I can see why men would think that women would be after money when it comes to splitting up. Because it happens a lot. In real life and in media.
Truth is, in this day and age, you're more likely to get divorced anyway because if you do, there's always someone else. Why marry in that case.
Hell, I'm all for a domestic partnership or a marriage under common law.
Just because you don't get the stupid certificate and the whole bru-haha that is getting married doesn't mean men fear being married.
Besides, it's cheaper to just cut out the whole wedding anyway, get married by a judge and jump on a plane to Margaritaville and f*** like rabbits the whole night.2
not all women want marriage either. men are not insulting ALL women by not getting married. YOU however are by sating ALL women want marriage & ALL women are offended by men not wanting to be with them. You make women sound pathetic, and I would be a hypocrite to get bothered by it, so I wont. I am just informing you. It is best if you speak for yourself.
As far as I am concerned, its immature for anyone to demand someone want to get married. It is even more absurd for someone to get married just because they are supposed to or because they are bored. And no person has to be the old person at a club. I don't even go to clubs.
Not everyone lives in cosmo magazine. some people do other things then date f*** get married and make dinner go to the office gain weight & blame everyone else because their life sucks.
jut don't marry a guy who is making you feel like you are forcing him to do something because its complete bullsh*t. it I his choice to get married or not get married it is your choice to marry guy who respects you and your marriage, instead f whining and try to change a guy clearly does not have the same values as you.
find a guy who respects you instead of worrying about what everyone else is doing in their home. You won't find any universal solution here. A lot of people don't see the point of marriage. There s no right or wrong, Its just life.
If you want to marry fond a guy who genuinely wants to marry.
You can't force people to want to marry & if you force them against their will, well, that would account for all the abuse, divorce, alcoholism-- found in marriages.
You know what they call it when everyone HAS (compulsory) to do the same thing in a society?0
As a girl on that side of the coin I can tell you one thing. Marriage is HELLA scary! It comes with so much responsibility! I rather run than do it, to be honest. It means being intimate with someone else, it means sharing everything, it means breaking down walls and being super vulnerable. Oh I know, such horrible things...
But seriously, it is. It's a scariness with no comparison. Nevermind the if we get divorced she gets half anyway even if she didn't' deserve it!
I told the boyfriend I want nothing from him, just him. If we got married and then divorced, I wouldn't take anything that wasn't mine. I don't need to...
but a lot of girls aren't like me...they want to take him for what he's worth, doesn't matter why or what...they feel entitled to his stuff which is now 'their' stuff.
I love the boyfriend, I do! But marry him? god... I just got cold sweat! It's too much to handle for a girl with intimacy issues...0
You're not alone!1
i have the exact opposite problem with my boyfriend.
3 months into the relationship and he's already joking about us getting married :(2
Most guys want to sleep with as many women as possible before they die. Marriage will considerably limit that number, even if there is a divorce. The cost of living has also skyrocketed, so there is more pressure for a married man nowadays to bring home the bacon, especially if the wife does not work or makes a very small amount of money.
I don't understand why so many women are desperate to get married though. I guess it must be biologically ingrained in them to want to have children, and no one wants to raise a family by herself.0
- Show AllShow Less
Select as Most Helpful Opinion?
You cannot undo this action. The opinion owner is going to be notified and earn 7 XPER points.