Why do people say intelligence is a turn on?

I mean, it makes sense in a way, but why?

Dumb I know :P little ironic given the question itself

i'm a pretty crappy conversationalist. oh well.


Most Helpful Girl

  • Intelligence is really important to me in a partner because I want to be with someone who is rational and logical, can keep up with and contribute to intellectual conversations, and who challenges me.

    I would be unhappy with someone who didn't contribute the things that I mentioned above. I wouldn't want to be with someone who became bored and whose eyes began to glaze over when I talked about things that they didn't understand, or who couldn't comprehend something I was trying to explain to them or a point I was trying to make. If we were a poor match in these areas, a large part of me would feel unsatisfied. But I also wouldn't want to be on the other side of it---where the things they enjoyed talking about went over my head. It would make me feel like I was lacking, like I couldn't stimulate them intellectually. That said, it isn't necessarily "the smarter the better"---I'd prefer to be with someone of similar intelligence to me.

    Of course, intelligence isn't everything. If I meet someone that I do connect with intellectually, we also have to be compatible in the other areas that are important to me.


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What Girls Said 3

  • I don't care so much about with as I do about intelligence. I want to be able to talk to a guy. I like sitting down after a class and being able to mention something really interesting that we learned about. Like if we read Common Sense, or A Modest Proposal and then have a discussion about it. I don't want to be in a relationship where, if I say something mildly intellectual I just get a black stare and a head cocked to the side.

    He doesn't need to know everything about everything, just have a descent grasp on basic concepts and a general knowledge of big/important things. I want to be able to have a discussion about... Say... Religion with out getting idiotic comments about how Muslims are going to kill us all, or how they attacked us on 9/11.

    It's a matter of wanting a relationship that's not just emotionally stimulation (and maybe physically stimulating) but also mentally engaging. I like to be challenged and have to find backing for my ideas. I like debating things and hearing other people's points of view.

    Overall, I want a partner I can respect. I can admire. And if he can't have a mildly intelligent conversation with me then I'm not going to feel attracted to him. I'm not going to really care about what he says and I'm not going to want to talk to him.

    There are other people who don't care for a variety of reasons, all of which are very valid. I'm just saying that I do care. And that's why.

  • Charm, wit, and worldly knowledge are a turn on.

    Never saw intelligence turn on any of my girls.

    I know a guy who's funny, sweet, and been all over Europe and Asia he has girls all over him and he's of average intelligence.

    I know a genius guy and let's just say he should get a prostitute to get sex. Not even going gay would help him.

  • intelligence is awesome, but he can't be snobby about it


What Guys Said 3

  • Intelligence is quite important, because it usually translates into wit. If you're smart, you tend to come up with interesting / funny things to say faster than less-intelligent people.

    Wit makes you a good conversationalist, gives you a much better sense of humour (your jokes aren't rehearsed), makes you seem livelier/more confident/sociable. Of course, intelligence also often translates into money, respect, or power, and intelligent people are usually motivated. So, there's a whole slew of positives there.

    That's why it turns me on anyway, I can only handle a girl if she's a good conversationalist and has a great sense of humour.

  • It works the same for both genders. Intelligence is increasingly replacing brawn and athleticism as a means of making a living. Back when we were hunter/gatherers, or even as recently as the industrial revolution when all the jobs were military or factory or "labor" jobs, success was pretty proportional to your physique. It's taken a long time for our brains to unwire themselves from thinking that physique = success (actually, most of the population is still working on it) but it's happening. People are starting to realize that in this day and age, brains usually lead to success, wealth, and security, which are all powerful subconcious drives when selecting a long-term mate.

    Of course, what people really mean when they say "intelligence is a turn on" is that socially skilled people who are also intelligent are a turn on. Witty, intelligent people tend to make statements that people remember. You won't win a girl by reciting pi to the thousandth decimal or remember Bernoulli's equation, but you will by busting great one-liners at the perfect time, providing a stimulating conversation on a wide range of topics, and being worldly and expansive in the things you talk about.

  • i have never heard that but I have experienced it a few times, wish it was true in were I live in, it would help me out a lot, but its an idiocracy