I'm getting married in June to my boyfriend of 2 years. I'm so excited about the wedding and our life together. However, once we marry my boyfriend is expecting I take his name. I don't want to do this as I like my independence and my maiden name.
I know it's a tradition and everything, but are men usually upset if their wife doesn't take their name? I thought about double-barreling but as we both have long surnames it would sound silly. Why does my boyfriend even want me to do this? And will he be upset if I don't?
Most Helpful Guy
I know I'm probably sexist..but I can't help how I feel...I would feel hurt by it. I mean, and its not because I'm some macho guy that wants to own his wife like property. I would just see a girl not taking my name as a slap in the face...and you have to understand for me anyway, its really because it is a tradition...and most women do it...my wife could have a better job than me, make more money, if it worked out I'd love staying home with children...but if she doesn't take my name it means that she felt like she had to deviate from the norm. think about this:
Women can have better jobs, make more money, than their husbands but if she has her husbands name...no one really thinks of it much. I know plenty of married couples like that and no one really thinks of her ruling over her husband.
Girls doesn't take guys name...ppl will say "o man, she's got him by the balls" or "SHE must wear the pants in the family"
I just feel like...why does your name give you inpendence? and plus...marriage is about becoming LESS independent...ur committing to living with someone...and you have to do a lot of comprimising and bowing to your spuses wishes on occassion.
Thats how I feel. I mean its just so common place that if a girl didn't do it...I would take it as a slap in the face. But maybe your boyfriend feels differently than me...prolly just ask him about it.2