So, my boyfriend and I are not getting married any time soon, but we have discussed it a bit and the subject of me changing my name came up. The thing is, I want to keep my maiden name. It's not because I'm some raging feminist, or because I don't love or respect him properly, or because I don't want to commit to him fully. I just want to keep my name. It's my name, and I like it, and I'm keeping it. End of story. I would like to maybe do a hyphen thing, but that's all.
But he seemed kind of disappointed and put out by this. I know this can be important to some guys. But it won't do any harm for me to keep my maiden name/ hyphenate, and it's what I really want to do. So how can I approach this without hurting his feelings? I don't know how to explain it to him.
Most Helpful Girl
In marriage, compromising is key. What I would do in this situation is ask him what makes the last name you have so important. Have an open conversation about this and outline why you feel it is important to keep your last name as well. Maybe hyphening it is the answer, but he still seems disappointed. But let him know it's not because you love him any less, it's your name, you have grown up with it and its what you have gone by forever. And it would be hard to change it over.
Hopefully after having that discussion both of you can make a decision that suits both of you.2