Interesting article about marriage in the Atlantic.

Do you believe men have been on a downward trend?

It's an interesting concept and many of the things the writer sights on the article, involving many different reasons and views into societal change.

link

Here is the link, it's 5 pages long if you want to read and focuses on many subjects.

Moreover, why do YOU think this is?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Hmm that was a very interesting article.

    I do agree -

    It does seem like a lot of guys are getting passed up by girls; in education, work, dating etc - Less guys are attending college and just getting left behind.

    I don't quite understand what happened to a lot of male ambition?

    I think maybe it has to do with two things;

    Men refusing typical responsibilities - and men getting tired of said responsibilities.

    What I mean is that men have a certain set of societal reponsibilities - ie - being the provider / worker / etc -

    For some reason in our generation, a lot of guys are simply ignoring those aspects. I'm guessing from the desire to escape the mundane mold - or laziness - or from adopting the complex that plagues a lot of our generation - this sense of entitlement that we don't have to work for anything in life.

    My second thought is that men are getting tired of these responsibilities - best example would be the whole approach thing. It was unheard of in the 60's to 80's for the men to say a girl should approach him. My dad drilled my brother about how he should " man up," to get the girl he wants - because my brother was saying that girls should approach him too -

    Likewise - a lot of guys are starting to go more for this idea - they say its for equality - but I honestly wonder if it's because men are getting left behind in dating? Perhaps putting the responsibility more on women will help their chances of finding a partner, whilst taking off the stress and work the guy must do to achieve one.

    Also, men are refusing to be the sole providers in the equation - that I don't blame them due to economic issues, and being the only provider in such a feeble market can prove hazardous to finances anyway.

    On top of that, now we have a lot of women who are independent / headstrong / ambitious - without the neccessity factor that use to be incorporated with men - a lot of women are fine doing it on their own.

    Independence isn't a bad thing - but its having some interesting effects on society I'd say.

    That as well as women disregarding the old societal mold we are taught to fill. My mom is like the author's mom in that article - she wasn't as extreme femanistic, but she taught me to not depend on men, and be my own women - gaining what we want in life, achieving our goals, and not letting anyone especially a guy, stand in our way.

    This subtle idea is giving birth to a lot of head strong girls - giving an interesting weight to the societal balance of male and female.

    With all that in mind - I think the dynamic of male and female is under going a societal revolution - in a way that woman are gaining more " power" if you will.

    Now that the playing field is almost in equate after years of patriarch rule - it will be interesting to see how everything plays out.

    Old ideas ideas are breaking easily under new ones - not sure if this change is good or bad ultimately...

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    • A couple things have happened.

      One is that manual labour continues to be worth less and less, and a fair number of men used to rely on it. Low level service jobs may not be something some men are naturally as good at or comfortable with.

      Second, I think a lot of male ambition was - for quite a while at least - tied to the fact that there was no other avenue to having regular access to sex. You wanted sex? You wanted kids? You better get a job.

    • True. Hmm I wonder how things will be established as far as the female / male dynamic in the next couple of generations

What Girls Said 1

What Guys Said 2

  • Interesting, nothing too novel for me, but her take at the end was interesting.

    Really she seemed to be coming to terms with hypergamy replacing monogamy.

    IMHO, monogamy as a social construction was not enforced by women - who as she demonstrates, will actually move to a hypergamy based society happily enough - but by the lower status men. The group never spoken to in the article is that pool of college-age-male-virgins. If monogamy and marriage go out the window, all the women sleep with the same few guys. Its those other guys who then go on a fundamentalist rampage.

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  • I had to stop reading the article. As a young man these days its very disheartening to see all these questions about the value of men. I've know that there is animosity towards men in modern society for a while now and its a major reason why I gave up on women about five years ago.

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    • it's not actually attacking us, it's pointing out some statistics and history. The writer clearly explains that she doesn't particularly like that men are falling back.

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    • This whole subject just makes me throw my hands up and say I'm done.

    • Liberal arts campuses are running over 60% female now.

      Women have outnumbered men in cities like NY for some time.

      Of course the men are out there somewhere - maybe you're where the men are.

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