Christmas engagement gone wrong, any advice?

Merry Christmas everybody! I have to admit, this year for me was great/terrible...

My boyfriend of almost three years gave me an engagement ring in front of his entire family @ exactly 12:25am on December 25th. Best moment ever, the ring is amazing. I was happy, he was happy,the family was happy. I cried, I was so shocked.

The moment I got home, my family found out about the engagement and they were ANGRY. First off, my boyfriend and I are young, a mere 21 years old and still attending University. The reaction from my aunt struck me, I was absolutely depressed the entire day. I didn't eat all day. I was expecting them to be excited, but instead I was being called a fool, an idiot, ect. My aunts about 33 and never been engaged or married.

The thing that hurts the most is the fact that everyone wants me to wait until I am 25, BUT my fiance wants to marry right away, within a year. I'm stuck in between doing what my family wishes verses my fiancée request to marry now. He was sad that I suggested we wait, yet I'm sad because of the constant battle that we are too young now. How do I tell my family my plan? I'm so afraid of me losing their respect and relationship with them, but I'm madly in love with this guy and want to be with him too.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • this situation can get very sticky...I suggest you just follow your heart. your decision right now will not have an effect on your family 5-6 years down the road. its not about what they want..its about what you and your life. they can't make that decision for you so..just follow your what and do what the heart tells you

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What Guys Said 2

  • You may not want to hear this, but your family may be right. You are much too young to be married, you need to think this through more. Sometimes family knows best, and as you get older you'll realize that. I know some of my cousins wish they had listened to the family. Wait it out and if your boyfriend is really in love with you, he WILL wait for you. My opinion is that 21 is too young - you need to graduate, and get yourself a career. Then I'm almost positive your family would be more than happy to give you a thumbs up.

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    • Although I agree that I'm young, I don't think I'm TOO young. I just wish people would see this than more of an age factor, rather than two young people who want to commit. My fiance and I both have associates degrees and working as subs currently in our county's school district. I just so happen to still live under my parents rigid roof. I love my family, but why should I jeopardize my happiness?

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    • By the looks of your profile, you're only 20 years old yourself! Unless you are really a 42 year old man using your sons profile. I just had a big LOL. Who the heck are you to give me such "adult" advice and you aren't even old enough to drink? I bet you never had a girlfriend longer than 6 months. I find it rather amusing that you have the nerve...I figure you would AT LEAST be 25!

    • I think you're going way too hard over this. You need stability in a marriage, every married couple knows that. Why do you think your family wants you to wait until you're 25. I don't know you, claim to know you, or care to know you. You asked, I answered. It doesn't matter if you think I'm right or not, that's why I said ” you may not want to hear this.”

  • Getting married is foolish--especially when you are so young.

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    • It isn't the end of the world if you don't get married. Getting married could ruin your otherwise great relationship.

    • But give me a legit reason aside from being too young. That's what I don't get about people, all they see is the age factor.

What Girls Said 1

  • You are young, but I'm 24 and my fiance is 30 we have been together for two years two months and twenty days and have been engaged for a little over a year, when we get married in October 2012 he will be 31 and I will be 25 we are waiting for me to graduate from college so I can concentrate on school. Don't let your family ruin your excitement, but I would maybe wait until you get done with school to get married. You don't need to rush down the aisle, you love each other and can take your time, in the end it is your decision your family is just trying to make sure you don't get hurt.

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    • Thanks.

    • Hey, I don't think you are too young, but school is impotant. You should do what is right for you, everybody is different. Congratulations on your engagement :)

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