I want to get married in the future but...

One of my life goals is to get married, I have no problem with the actual ceremony but I am scared of the reception. I am a really boring person I never dance, I don't like loud music, I don't drink and I get really nervous making speeches. What do you think about this?


Most Helpful Girl

  • It will be your wedding reception, right?

    If your wife wants a dance, I think it's fair to give her one. She'll know you don't dance, so it's up to her to accept that, and I don't see why it would be such a terrible thing to compromise on.

    Have the music in a separate area where you don't have to be around excessive volume, or keep a limit on how loud the music can get.

    You don't have to drink, that's your choice.

    I don't see why the groom should have to make a speech, but if you absolutely have to say something, there's nothing wrong with making it short and sweet.

    Keep in mind, it's your wedding, so as long as you've talked things over with your future wife beforehand, who's to say you can't make some details your own?

    The two most important people on that day are you and your wife. If one of you isn't happy, that's a problem, not whether or not someone else is upset because you didn't bust more moves, crank up the music, get wasted, or prattle on about how much you love your wife and how you're looking forward to spending your life with her and how wonderful she is and how glad you are that you got married and... You get the point.


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What Girls Said 4

  • I think its normal. I'm the same way but for other reasons. I've just never liked being the center of attention and think that I'd be wasting everyone's time with a reception... I don't know, just me. Anwyays I think once you find a girl that this might change. Once you fall in love you might want to celebrate it and show your love and relationship off at the reception. Or chances are she'll want to and will push you to join her at the reception or she'll just take the spotlight so you don't have to worry about it.

  • You need to snag yourself a fiance first. ;) I guarantee you that you probably won't have to do much planning wise. There are definitely ways to avoid dancing (especially being the groom), with the exception of the first dance and any dances your bride might want you to do. You can pre-plan what those will be though. Everyone wants a chance to dance with the bride, so you don't have to be on the dance floor all the time.

    At the weddings I've been to, the speeches were all made by family members and friends. The only thing the groom or bride might do is thank everyone for showing up and tell them to enjoy the food/dancing.

    If you really don't want dancing or loud music, have the reception in a venue(conservative church) that doesn't allow it, or just talk to your fiance about how you want the reception to go. Haha. I went to a wedding like that. There were about 100 people and we just ate, talked and met new people with light music in the background. Everything was elegantly done and completely fit with the married couple's personalities, so it didn't feel lacking.

  • Well at most wedding receptions that I've been to, the bride and groom really only made one speech - usually it was friends and family members who did most of it so you don't need to worry about that at least.

    As for dancing, you only have to do the first dance with your new bride and basically you can just slow dance together so swaying back and forth shouldn't be too much of a hassle either I hope. It's fine if you don't drink - you can just drink soda or bubbly water if you want. No one is going to check your glass and it's probably best for the bride adn groom not to get completely smashed that evening anyway.

  • I want to get married but I don't want a wedding ceremony. They're so boring to me and I don't want to make my hubby spend all of that money for something I don't even care for. Wedding dresses are pretty and all but I'm only going to wear it once. I also don't like being the center of attention either.


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