Engaged after 5 months...

My boyfriend ( well I guess fiancée) and I began dating about 2 months ago. We were acquaintances beforehand but started hanging out a bit during the new semester. He was in a on again off again relationship with an absolute witch and I wasn't very happy in mine either. So over the course of several weeks we came to the mutual conclusion that we should leave our significant others, maybe for each other. So he left her, and I left him and it has been history ever since. We have both met each others families and everyone loves everyone. We do have occasional arguments, if you even wanna call them that, we disagree talk it out and move on. We never name call or throw character flaws in each others faces, we argue in the healthiest way possible. LOL!

The other night, my boyfriend asked me to marry him... He says he was planning to ask me during late summer (end of July/ beginning of August) but he just couldn't wait any longer. Because of the sporadic proposal, he hasn't gotten the ring yet and does not want it announced until he gives me my ring... So I guess my questions are... How serious does he seem with the proposal? Is he just blinded by love? Is this all too soon? He wants to marry a year after we announce the engagement... Does this show that he is putting me off for later or he wants time to plan everything correctly?

I really just need thoughts and opinions on the whole ordeal, because I do love him and never thought twice about saying yes but I don't want to rush into things and ruin what we have by acting prematurely.


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Most Helpful Girl

  • I think he is rushing ..the fact that it was his idea to leave your significant others plus the whole proposal thing kinda gives me the feeling that he wants to rush in to something real quick which is not healthy. It could be real love of course , and it could be that you guys will live happily after , but are you sure ? I was sure until you added that he was in a relationship right before this one which is a red flag. What if you are a rebound thing ? What if he feels desperate and doesn't wanna lose a good chance ? Ask him to give you time , even if you can't wait yourself .. see how responds.

    The fact that you guys don't argue yet is all right , you just started dated 5 months ago according to your question .. usually serious issue don't come up now :)

    My advice is to give it more time , whether he wants to plan everything or not is unknown .. and maybe even he doesn't know for sure .. just let the issue cool down , and give it more time :) good luck!

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What Guys Said 2

  • the fact that you are even asking this question should tell yourself you're not quite ready for marriage. a long engagment period can be a good thing because it's like a trial run of being married. so long as by the time you walk down the aisle you don't need strangers advice, you'll be ready

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  • Take your time!

    It's good he wants to wait a year or so after the engagement announcement to actually get married. I definitely don't read that as putting you off or leading you on. No reason to rush into marriage, which regardless of anyone's personal/religious views is one of the most important decisions & most significant commitments you'll make in your entire life.

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What Girls Said 4

  • I don't think you are ready seeing how your are asking this on a post. But aside from that, I don't even necessarily think a fast proposal is an issue either when you know it's right and have already discussed major issues ahead of time (ie: kids, beliefs, views on marriage, expectations). What alarmed me more was the fact that you both were in relationships with other people when you had feelings for each other and got together. I'm not sure you both allowed enough time to "get over" and heal from each others prior relationships. Well you are unofficially engaged now, so use this time to take time to really figure out what you want and expectations are for the future. Getting out of your prior relationship may have sounded great but now that you are out, you have a whole new whirlwind going on. Marriage is for life, so if you are going to do it be sure. If not, postpone or just don't set a date until you are sure. Engagements break up all the time, but marriage should be taken seriously as a vow for life. Good luck.

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  • it's good to wait a year, get to know each other and plan it right!

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  • I think he was rushing because he wants to tell you he's serious but... that was a really immature way to go about it.

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  • I think you know in your heart... Only one who knows how you guys are together is the 2 of you. I have been with my husband for ever...

    He asked me to merry him a month after we met.

    Also depends on how seriously you take your vows. Till death do us part, is that literal to you, to him?

    Do you want the same things out of life...? Kids, travel all that kind of stuff is really stuff you need to talk and think about.

    Why do you want to marry him... is there any reason/s to rush it...?

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