I have been with my girlfriend for 8 months and I know it's still soon. But if after 2 years of us being together everything goes well like it has been so far, I plan on proposing. I need advice on how to prepare for marriage especially financially. What is a good hourly pay rate for a job to live comfortably in a marriage? How much money should I save up before proposing? Anything else I need to know? Advice please
Advice on how to get ready for marriage?
What Girls Said 1
don't do it!0
What Guys Said 1
Okay, clear something up, were you 2 years as friends and 8 months as an item? Or were you guys a couple for two years and lived together for 8 months? Not that it really matters, more my curiosity.
The amount of money isn't as key as how you manage the money you do earn. I personally know financially stable couples (a single earner no less) getting by at $40K per year. And, I also know a guy who makes on average $300K, single, per year (depending on which investments return what), and he always finds himself running to those payday loan store. Like time management, money management is proof of one's priorities in life. In most circumstances, you can learn to live within your means, and save for the future, regardless of income level. Learn to get on the same sheet of music with money. Often the biggest conflicts with money are because one wants to spend it on stuff, the other wants to save it, and that causes much conflict. It's not shallow or superficial to discuss and work out a compromise on couples financial management.
The "standing" rule is the ring should cost a man three months salary. If you can do this or more and not go into debt, I say go for it, if your heart desires it. But if the woman demands it, then to me it's a red flag. The keepers are those who while would love a ring, they value the relationship far more than to put that kind of pressure on him.
Aside from money, mutual respect is central to a marriage that will not merely last, but be good overall. Both of you should know and accept you are still two different people, and should already accepted the differences in each other at this point. Regardless of the issues behind conflicts, always be respectful, even and perhaps especially if the other is not respectful to you.
And don't forget to still do things together. The euphoria of a new couple wears off, but doesn't mean you stop being a couple.1
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