How can I get my fiance's mother to like me?

So the other day we were over at my fiance's parents house, and her sister's along with their husbands were over for a little family get together. Everything is going as usual as it always does after dinner. The guys in the kitchen talking nonsense, the ladies in the living room going on about this and that, and me kicking it with the little ones playing video games and sneaking them more soda and whatever sweets I can find lol. Anyways I'm online looking up cheats codes at this point I think the guys are out back and I hear the ladies talking about one of my fiance's sister's new car.

My fiance was like "i wish I would have gotten a new car for Christmas" and my fiance's sister was like "Ha, lets trade I get your husband and your walk-in closet and you can have my car and my husband. The car is nice but I know this means I can't expect him to do anything for a while now. Least your husband-to-be actually helps, hell he even helps when you babysit my kids. I can't get my damn husband to watch the kids for 10mins while I take a shower. Plus, You guys actually do stuff do you know that week you guys took our kids with you to florida? We didn't do anything here! Every night I tried to get him to go out while the kids were with you guys and nothing! Hell we only had sex one time that week"

And for the next few minutes they kind of went back and forth with my fiance trying to make her sister feel better, and her sister giving me compliments and recognition one after another.

Definitely made my day some of the stuff she mentioned I didn't even remember I did it.

Then her mom chimed in, first it sounded like she was just trying to change the subject. Then it took a turn cause it of nowhere she's like "Jessie(my fiance) you watch that boy, I don't trust him I never have yeah he's great with the kids and he does offer to help with everything but something tells me he's up to something he's no good."

Now my fiance's sister jumps in and is like "mom what the hell are you talking about they've been together for almost five years now, also they're getting married soon and your saying stuff like this now?" Which her mom replied "i never said I was happy about this marriage" which led to both of my fiance's sisters yelling "Mom!" loud enough to freak out the kids and to make a few of the guys come in to check on things. Clearly none of the ladies knew I was still inside cause they all looked shocked when I walked into the living room from the hallway and asked if everything was alright.

It was kind of weird looking at her mom after that, even worse trying to play nice when she calls and actually wants to talk to me. Its like damn for the last four years I've always laughed at my friends when they complain about their in-laws or bf/gf's parents. Because I thought I had a good thing going with my fiance's parents.

Should I even attempt to try and get her to like me?

Should I just avoid this lady and go on enjoying hanging with the rest of the family?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • So you are given recognition for something you just do, like helping out, and don't even remember? That is really good, keep it up for sure because that will make your fiancĂ© a very happy woman.

    Your mother-in-law is paranoid, that is all there is too it. If you honestly have not done one thing to make her distrust you or be suspicious of you then she has issues with letting her daughter go, not with you directly. Everybody else approves and because you have shown your worth and deserved it, don't feel down because of her opinion, she is just one person and guess what...mothers think they know it all but they certainly don't!

    The fact that you herd this without being told by somebody else means you can't approach anybody about it or else you'll be ridiculed. However, I'm sure if you wanted to you could confide in your fiance and tell her you over heard her mother and ask her to delve into the matter with her and find out exactly why she doesn't approve of you.

    But avoiding her will only make it worse and cause her to become even more suspicious of you so I do not advise that at all.

    Good Luck to you man and congratulations on the wedding.(soon to come)

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