So story is, I got raped when I was a 9. Didn't have sex until I got married 13 years later, but sex was a bit more difficult than I expected, so I needed to go back to therapy.
Now appearently my husband called my therapist just to ask how it's going. And he told him everything. Appearently not in great detail, which is good, because it is stuff that I don't talk to my husband about. I'm just afraid that sometime he will tell my husband more
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No they are not. They are supposed to maintain strict patient confidentiality.
Certainly not if they are licensed. I suppose that unlicensed therapists can do whatever they want, since they are not responsible to anyone.
There are maybe a few exceptions. If they have reasonable suspicion that a crime will be committed or that you will harm yourself, then they are required to report this to a law authority. Also, if you were in a couple counseling session with your husband, the rules may be a little bit different than a private counseling session in terms of what he needs to keep secret, since it's rather difficult to counsel a couple without sharing information. Another exception is if you were a minor at the time of therapy, and then I believe the psychiatrist is allowed (but not required) to share info with your legal guardians. Finally if you are required to do a psychiatric evaluation for a court order or something similar, the therapist would be required to release that info to someone, although you would know about this beforehand.
Other than that, what he did was wrong and you have a few options in terms of what you can do:
1. Get a new therapist.
2. File a complaint with whatever professional board gives him his license.
3. Sue him.
Unless he really wronged you, I would avoid #3 since a lawsuit would be emotionally tolling on you, and not help you heal.
#2 is very easy to do, and based on the severity (or negligence) in what he did, is something you should seriously consider because if he is that unprofessional than the board deserves to know, since his lack of professionalism could hurt other patients. Make sure you have all the facts though, and verify that he actually did break the rules. Also I suppose you can subjectively ask yourself if he meant well, since we are talking about damaging his career.
#1 is something you should probably do regardless, even if you don't bother reporting him. You don't want to be paying someone you can't trust. Even if he meant well, and even if he strictly didn't knowingly break any rules (which he probably did), he should not have given information to your husband without asking you first. A good therapist will always go out of their way to make sure they preserve their patients' trust, going beyond even what the law and professional boards require.1