Possible mistress, guilty?

I confronted the woman I assumed was having an affair with my husband. She was so defensive and turned the tables on me. That I was wrong and I had no grounds to thinking anything bad that I was just creating problems and my husband has enough. Is this a response from a guilty person? I was shocked told her to back off and left. I guess I was expecting , I am sorry or something. MAybe I'm wrong?

Updates:
My husband during a drunk conversation admitted to an affair with her.. he doesn't remember saying it. Now he says don't believe what a drunk person says. That's why I was left with the doubt. So I confronted her.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Well personally I don't think it was the best move to confront her. Even if you were to confront her I don't think you did it the best way. The thing is, say there has been an affair... you don't know for sure that this woman knew about you. You don't know what he told her to get where they ended up. I only say this because I was in a serious relationship for years and found out he had already been in a relationship with someone else longer than he was with me... making ME the other woman.

    Also I personally find that people are more honest when they are drunk not liars. Since you already confronted her I suggest you approach her again and apologize for the way things happened. Explain to her what he said and that you're just upset and trying to figure out the truth so you can move on in life. I think any woman can understand that and be sympathetic of that. If she is still mean/nasty or unforgiving, I would be kind of suspicious as to why she's so mad about a simple misunderstanding if in fact she didn't do anything wrong.

    I suggest you also openly communicate with your husband and let him know that you're not buying his story. Whatever that means for the two of you I don't know, that's between you and him. But you cannot just let it be bottled up inside of you. You need to take the time to evaluate how much you trust him and if you want to move on from this. If you do move on just be observant, not nosy or paranoid. If you cannot move on, you need to let him know you need some time for awhile or that you aren't going to be able to do it anymore.

    By expressing your true feelings he'll have the opportunity to show you by actions that he cares about you and that you can trust him.

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What Guys Said 3

  • Don't jump on assumptions.

    link

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  • This is one of those man-hating BS questions - there's no husband, no mistress, just an ever changing story with relevant details getting tacked on when people don't give her the validation she wants.

    Makes a change from involving his mother though.

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    • I am the mistress..

    • Like I said... ever changing story...

  • You were foolish to confront without hard evidence - it makes you look paranoid and insecure.

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What Girls Said 2

  • Why would ypu confront a woman about a possible affair that you have no proof or evidence of? That was a bad move on your part. You could be wrong. If you have are suspicious of something, then that's something you need to confront your husband about, not this woman who may or may not even be doing anything with him.

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  • Assumed? That wasn't a good move.

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