Me and my boyfriend are 25 years of age and will have been together for 8 years soon. We have a house together and are generally really happy. HOWEVER... He plays in a band and has recently recruited a new female singer. My heart dropped when I saw her photo on facebook because she is very good looking, nice figure and also the fact that she shares a common interest with my boyfriend. This coupled with the fact that she will be spending lots of time with him for band practice is breaking my heart. He's never shown disloyalty to me or anything like that and we are thinking of getting engaged soon. BUT I cannot shake off this horrible feeling of dread whenever I think about him being with her and spending time with her, I don't know what do and have cried about it many times. He doesn't know how I feel and I feel ashamed about myself because if the girl was not attractive I would not be bothered about the situation - I know that's pathetic but I can't help the way I feel. Please help any advice would help.. thanks.
Most Helpful Girl
You really need to feel secure in yourself that your relationship is solid, because if you keep letting these thoughts manipulate your mind you will probably end up destroying the relationship. Talk to him if you think it may help, however you say that your boyfriend has never been disloyal and you are thinking of setting up a home together so why would he do anything to ruin that. You probably need to accept the fact that their relationship will probably be of a professional nature and nothing else. Make your presence known try to meet your boyfriend after rehersal or ask if you can watch him, maybe once you get to know this girl and realise there is nothing more to it you will probably feel a whole lot better. He is in a band and will always have attractive/unattractive women around him and if you are finding it hard to comes to term with it now maybe you need to think about what the future holds for you?0