[I'm a guy] My girlfriend and I have been together for 5+ years. It was an immediate mutual attraction but after ONLY a month our differences and personalities started to clash. They didn't create huge fights; they mainly left her feeling disappointed in who I was from the person she thought I was. I was a single Dad raising a 4yo daughter all on my own -- she was very critical of my parenting skills and style to the point of saying she would never want to have kids with me. I am an Investment Banking Exec and she thinks my job lack integrity and is about greed and is extremely condescending to my career and accomplishments [she's a massage therapist with a high school education] saying it's all driven by greed and ego. She hates driving in my car because it's too "ostentatious" and embarrassing. She is appalled at my personal spending habits. She calls me a mamma's boy and ridicules the fact that I talk to mom everyday. The list goes on an on. I am very tolerant of her differences but the one thing I can't stand is how abusive her language gets when she's angry - she resents my calmness during arguments saying it's a aloof and condescending and passive aggressive. She finds me irresponsible, lacking integrity, selfish, and careless to the point of being a liability to her. Our backgrounds and cultures couldn't be more different - I am from a wealthy educated black caribbean family and she is white from an very humble rural upbringing.
This all surfaced after a a month yet it has been 5 years and we've been together and neither wants to break-up yet we both agree things are doomed to fail. The sex is great and we both agree on that and the best times we have are only after fights when we both cry and hug --- things are wonderful for 2 days and then right back to square one. Now she wants to get married to me! I have no idea why because she thinks so poorly of me. The weird thing is I lover her and want to marry her too!!! Is this relationship doomed?
Most Helpful Girl
Honestly, she sounds incredibly verbally abusive and picky to me. Yes, to me it sounds like this relationship is doomed to fail. Either you'll get tired of her nagging, or she'll become tired of nagging. Sounds to me like she just wants to get married for the sake of it, so that she doesn't have to find another man who puts up with her BS. And since this has been going on for over 5 years, I don't think you'll be able to change this situation. It's up to you whether you want to drag it out or not. Breaking up just seems inevitable to me.0