What are some of your favorite movie quotes of all time?

WhiteSteve
I'm a big quote guy. My sense of humor is like 50% reliant on well-timed, appropriate movie/TV quotes that apply to the current situation, haha. I don't even try to do it, it just happens, and remembering these quotes practically word for word is maybe my best natural talent. Unfortunately that's a pretty useless talent, haha.

So do you guys have any quotes that you love and/or reference often? They can be funny, meaningful, profound, whatever. Most of mine are funny, I'm a comedy guy :)

Seth Rogen and Romany Malco, The 40 Year Old Virgin

(upon learning that Steve Carrell has never slept with a woman)

RM: "Dude, are you gay? It's cool if you're gay. I have friends who fuck guys...in jail."

SR: "I touched a guy's balls once at Hebrew school."

Jason Schwartzman, Slackers

(JS plays Ethan, a weird college student, obsessed with an out of his league classmate. The movie revolves around him blackmailing a trio of roommates who get through college with elaborate cheating schemes, one of whom is involved with the girl he obsesses over. In return for not turning them in they have to try to get him together with that girl, as he lacks social skills. At one point, he says to one of the black mailed guys as he completes a task...)

JS: You're smart, I like you. I'll probably give you a nickname.

(Later, upon realizing he has been double-crossed...)

JS: I EVEN CAME UP WITH A NICKNAME FOR YOU, BUT NOW I'M NOT GOING TO TELL YOU! OK, FINE, IT WAS "LASER!"

Jack Nicholson, As Good As It Gets

Woman: "How do you write women so well?" (Nicholson plays a famous author)

JN: "I think of a man, and then I take away reason and accountability."

(The ladies will hate that one, but I've found it to be so true. Hahaha)

Alvin Mack, The Program

(on what he loves most about football...)

AM: "The best thing is when you hit a guy...and you know it's *killin' him*...but you feel great. It's just him and you...and HE'S the one that's hurting."

Steve Lattimer, The Program

(on what he loves most about football...)

"I don't know...its the battle. Going to war with the other guys, hanging together, having our own dorm, staying in hotels the night before the games...setting ourselves apart, being different than everybody else, having a chance to be somebody, to do something that people look up to you for, your strength, your courage...not everybody can play football... we're the lucky ones."

Alvin Mack, The Program

(in the film room after showing him to be illiterate and apathetic in a tutoring session, but displays his football IQ...)

Coach Winters: Alright, this is Mississippi State's offensive set. 2nd and 2 on our own 24, what defensive set might we call?

AM: Eagle Zipper Hero, unless the setback shifts into the I.

CW: Good

[clicks to next slide]

CW: 3rd and 7?

AM: Okie Thunder Lion.

CW: What's your assignment?

Alvin Mack: Kill the quarterback.

[click]

AM: Hit the tight end so hard his girlfriend dies.

[click]

AM: Kill EVERYBODY.
Updates
+1 y
I'm all jacked up about The Program now, haha. Here's the link to those quotes and some other awesome shit. Gives me chills every time.

link
Updates
+1 y
Almost forgot one of my favorites. From Teen Wolf (the movie, not that clown shoes show on MTV), one of my all time underrated movie characters, the basketball coach, Bobby Finstock...

link

Specifically, its the quote at the end about his Three Rules, but pretty much everything out of the guy's mouth is gold.
What are some of your favorite movie quotes of all time?
18 Opinion