I hate to fail in anything even when I know that it's almost impossible for me to succeed. But that doesn't mean I like hard work or spending my time doing things I'm not even interested in but doing for some strange reason.
But sometimes, I do lots of hard work and still get 'nothing'.... That's when it really hurts, to know that I tried and got 'nothing'.
I'm one of those people who when they wish to achieve something almost work obsessively and try and try and try.. Hoping to see their dreams come true before their last breath. But when we don't, we feel sad, so so sad.. And angry.. But quickly forget about it and tell our minds to 'just forget it' because it hurts to even think and as long as no one brings it up in a discussion, we're fine-- or should I say numb?
I'm one of those people who when we fail feel so much hurt and rage that after some time we become to feel numb and delete it out of our minds like some computer file..
I don't know how to make the best decisions and I try and fail mostly. Many people judge me because of my bad decisions and never think twice about what their saying could really hurt me. I hate them. They hate me..
My life so far, has been a failure, for me (at least). But I will succeed and get what I want it or I'll die trying. It'll be an honour.
Most people don't appreciate my efforts 'cause they don't know the amount of hard work I put into anything I do. Just because I'm smiling or laughing doesn't mean I'm happy.
People take advantage of my talents and i let them, thinking they're my friends and as a friend I 'must' always help them 'cause that's what friends do..
But I'll be more alert now, I won't let anything happen to my hard work- or the future I have planned. And I WILL succeed.
My lord is with me and he'll protect me.
Lord, give me strength and make me strong (Amen).