There's a fine line between being confident and being cocky. They're almost the exact same thing, but there's a very tiny, let's say, a 1 degree difference. And that 1 degree can very easily make someone think you're the definiton of awesomeness OR it can make them full on hate you. I doubt most of y'all would prefer the latter over the former (those of you who would - cool, whatever floats your goat).
Let's look at the official definitions of both:
- COCKY - arrogant; pertly self-assertive; conceited
- CONFIDENT - sure of oneself; having no uncertainty about one's own abilities, correctness, successfulness, etc.; self-confident; bold
Which one sounds better? Obviously the second one. But, looking at those definitons, it can be seen how one could be mistaken for the other. The difference is really quite transparent, not that easy to see, and for this reason I felt the need to dig deeper into the topic. I'd like to share my personal thoughts on the matter and what REALLY is the difference between the two. It's actually pretty damn simple, believe it or not.
First things first.
What is confidence?
I personally think that the simple way to define confidence is when someone can acknowledge all of their strengths; having a realistic view of who you are; being proud of the assets that you have. I'm sure every person can name at least one thing they're very good at, something the excel at. There's nothing wrong with being fully aware of your abilities, but, when I say that, it brings up the question...
When does confidence become cockiness?
I see cockiness as overly bragging about something that you don't have bragging rights for. As a matter of fact, cocky people are acually very insecure. People who are cocky feel like they have to prove something to everyone. However, if someone's confident, they don't have to, because they're comfortable with themselves (that's the great thing about being confident - you're comfortable with yourself, who doesn't want that?).
How to avoid being cocky?
I imagine cocky is not how most people wish to label themselves. The key to being confident instead of cocky, like I said before, is being comfortable with yourself. How to do that? Well, you just gotta find a place within yourself where you're just comfortable. Maybe pretend that other people are nonexistent for a bit. If no one else exists, there's nobody you can brag to. Catch that feel, apply it to yourself and try to embrace it to the best of your abilities. Stop feeling like you need to impress others. Because you don't. Trust me, by trying so hard to impress everyone around you, you're actually doing the opposite. Just take a breath, chill, be more laid-back, focus on something else. Don't push things about yourself down people's throats. Actually, acknowledging that you're cocky rather than confident is the first step. If you can do that, the rest shouldn't be THAT hard.
Hope this makes sense.
Good luck in changing your ways, cocky ones! 🐯