Story Of My Life: This Father's Day Is For My Mother

Story Of My Life: This Fathers Day Is For My Mother

I was born into a poor family, my father was always at work or out with a girlfriend while I was with my grandparents, because my dad didn't want me with my mom.

I grew up moving around a lot and no matter where I lived, I was incredibly bullied. I was always that teachers-pet, I read a lot and I was smarter than them so they didn't like me. I was always an avid reader and bookworm.

After years and years of bullying, telling my dad and him doing nothing, I just came to accept it and tried my best to ignore it. I eventually became incredibly depressed. By the time I was in 8th grade, I tried to commit suicide. An EIGHTH grader.

Well my dad wasn't ever one for emotion but around 7-8th grade, before and after my suicide attempt, my dad became a lot more emotionally abusive. He would call me fat, make fun of my acne etc. He'd say "Why dont you ever hang out with friends?" etc but when I asked he'd say no and he'd force me to stay home so I could be his personal maid, nurse, cook whatever he needed.

When he found out I was suicidal in 9th grade, he dragged me into the garage and handed me a blade, said "Slit your wrists, bleed out." Then locked me in there and left. That was the day i said my first official "fuck you" to my dad. (The photo below is the exact kind).

As time progressed my father began hitting me, slaps to my head or smacking me, using the belt on my ass too. Even if I did something *his wife specifically told me to do* he'd punish me by doing these military workouts I did NOT have the strength/endurance to do. He'd have me hold 10 pound weights in each hand, hold my hands above my head completely straight, while doing laps up and down the flight of stairs in my house. That was a part of his punishment, so was taking away my fucking BOOKS. He not only physically and mentally abused me but he emotionally did too.

"Your writing is shit, you'll never become an author."
"You're fat, you're really getting a second plate of dinner?"
"I think you should cut back on the sweets."
"I can play connect the dots on your forehead."
"You have no friends Jade, that's why you're always home."
"I'm beginning to hate you."

Good, because I do hate you "Dad".

I took the beatings, I took the emotional hate...but as soon as my dad said "You'll never become an author", I hated him with a passion from that moment on.

One night, I was punished from all electronics for some dumb thing. I was using my brothers computer to message my mom because I was so depressed and I wanted to live with her. My dad burst into my room screaming and just began beating me with the belt not caring where it landed. I had welts and was bleeding because of him.

The next day at school i told one of my friends why it hurt so much to sit down, she wouldn't stop asking. She got PISSED. So she dragged me from the classroom to the counselor, she explained to her counselor what was wrong and made me talk to her.

Eventually, after and long and grueling process of cops and photo taking and CPS, my mother got temporary custody of me so she picked me up and took me to her home. I was finally with my mom. Since I was with my mom, she let me use her phone. I had a crush on this guy who I befriended during the time I was iwth my dad so this guy (B) and I started dating.

Well I'll make that long story short, he ended the relationship with me by saying "I can do better then you, forget about me." And I was heartbroken- it took me over 5 months to get over him and to this day I still miss him and even though we were in an unhealthy relationship, and he lied to me so so so much, apart of me will always love him.

Now I am currently in a very healthy, very happy relationship with a very sweet and loving boyfriend, my mother had a baby, my mother is engaged, and I am in my last year of High School. I still have depression but not as severe, I still have anxiety, but I am no longer suicidal. In August I have to go to court in front of a jury because the state is pressing charges against my dad, and I'm gonna end up crying, but if my dad is found to be guilty then my mother gets automatic full custody of me.

My mother has done more for me in a year than my father has for me in 12 years. Sure we aren't rich, we do't have a fancy house, we don't own a mustang but we have love.

Now I agree that fathers day is for fathers, but mothers day is for mothers, but I do not have a father. I have a sperm donor, someone who ruined my life, my self confidence and my self-worth. I am slowly working to gain confidence and self-esteem, I'm slowly regaining happiness even in this fucked up world with fucked up family. But....I still have hope there is good in this world.

#SeeMyWork #FathersDay


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What Guys Said 12

  • Was your dad a veteran? The strict harshness and sort of knife he gave you suggests the USMC. I ask not to excuse his actions, but to show that perhaps he himself may not be right in the head either. PTSD and all of that.

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  • Oh wow, this makes me really thankful for my parents.
    I'm so sorry.
    Do you mind if I ask if you think your dad will be convicted

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  • Well... bummer.

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  • Aw man, that's very very harsh!
    I wish you the best of luck for moving forward in your life despite of what terrors you survived. Glad you have put it behind yourself.
    Don't lose yourself girl. You're stronger than you really think you are.
    (I say this as I've been through a similar life-course)

    Stories like these...
    they creep me the hell out to become a father myself someday D=

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  • I know I told you much already
    But again your amazing
    Your one of the best people I know
    Your vastly talented
    Your kind, your wise, and beautiful
    I'm thankful to know you everyday
    Reading this brings a tear to my eye and I wish I could hug as much for you as for me
    Thanks for being you Jade

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  • Glad to hear you're doing better. Judging by your MyTakes, you're a phenomenal writer.

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  • Explains why you're a little fucked in the head :(
    Your father is pos, you become the best write you can be. Success will be the best revenge. And of course make sure he's locked up.

    I could've said so bad so sorry yada yada but you don't sem like the sentimental type. And trust me from your Takes you are a good writer.

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  • You are such a strong young lady to have endured that. What a terrible father, it is hard to believe men can so awful... but I've heard it before. and all you wanted was his support and affection. I have book reference if you want to read about the ordeal of anothe rwoman. but maybe you should focus on the positive instead at this point.

    I'm glad you had a good mom.
    Have you gone to and are you in counseling to heal those wounds? it takes time.

    Read the Bible or understand what Christ did? He solved this stuff long ago, but the work is still being done. there is much healing and wisdom in there.

    www.vineyardcolumbus.org/.../

    this video, first part especially speaks to the impacts of father wounds. There is a series on what a true fathers love looks like. draw from that... I hope it helps.

    You might change your name. What you see can be a reflection of how you see yourself. How about SweetSavedAngel? Break the chain on you so it is not repeated with anyone else and the next generation...

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    • Thank you very much. And no thanks, its fine.
      And yea she's a bit much but I'm glad too. No I haven't yet but my mother wants me to go to a therapist.
      And I don't believe in God or the Bible, I'm a Wiccan but thank you though.

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    • I wrote a mytake about it so you can read that if you want.
      And I know, but we haven't had a chance to find me a therapist.

    • I have one I go to which you could talk to by phone... assuming you don't live in columbus ohio. much better to find one locally in person, but I'll say this... I went through 5 of them before I found a good one.

      Caveat... she's a Christian counselor which means her perspective is from that. she doesn't only counsel christians, but its her angle on things.

      I'll read it...

  • Your father really was terrible. He embodies the definition of a bastard and abuse, simply an abusive bastard.

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  • Don't ever stop writing... you are really good! Nice Take!

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  • I like your mom, but I hate your dad. I hope he gets convicted. I'm glad you never committed suicide and you were strong enough to go through all of this. I hope your depression and anxiety goes away soon. You will be an author some day. You write great mytakes.

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  • You have great writing. I hope to see your book out in the future.

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What Girls Said 13

  • Wow, I'm really sorry you had to go through all of this.
    You're an amazing writer, so keep it up, and from what I see of you on here, you seem like an amazing person too! <3 sending you a hug!

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  • Your writing is amazing. And you're a beautiful person. I can't imagine having to going through all of that. You're brave, smart, unique in every way. If your father can't see that then screw him. I hate him.

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  • Sorry that happened to you. Your dad is a dick.

    While my dad is in my life, he is a deadbeat. My mom had just got knee replacement Surgery, and all he does is lounge around and run the streets, and I have to help my mom. I cook, clean, and take care of my mom. My dad does nothing. He takes my mom's money and he doesn't even buy food for the house. My mom has to. They cut her paycheck too so we barely eat. Sorry dad, but he has to step it up. He's definitely not getting anything from me.

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  • Another sperm shooter

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  • A very heart-touching story 😔😔😔😔

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  • Wow, you have been through a lot.
    I just want to give you a hug. *sending you a really tight virtual hug* 💕

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  • I have a question. It took you five months to get over your dad or your relationship? Did your father tell you to get over him or your ex?

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  • There are a lot of good, beautiful, nice things still in this world. If I lived near u I'd like to have friendship with u. U need support that's why and u need someone to do that without conditions. U are a fantastic writer cause u express your feelings in a fabulous way and you really made me cry sis. Don't forget that everything happens for a reason and that helped for making you stronger. I write poems so when i ask my teacher about poets and writers she tells me that the poet or writer should sacrifice a part of his life to give good art. I'm completely completely sure that if u try to write a book u will succeed... lol forget that other stupid ex. Why do u miss someone who doesn't love u? If your actual boyfriend loves u and your mum loves u and u have a great big writing talent u have all u need, trust me! No one's life is perfect but you are blessed. You are a strong and talented person that's why u r blessed. U have survived a really big and bad life part, and not all of us can do that so move on, and don't let silly things ruin your life. MOVE ON:))

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  • I am so sorry you had to go through all that shit with your dad...

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  • Thank you so much for sharing!

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  • I'm sorry you had to go through all that. It's very fucked up.

    Mother's day is for my mom too, but that's only because my dad passed away when I was very young. He was a great person and I was very fortunate to have him in my life for those few years.

    You know... I often hear this saying about how any woman can get pregnant and give birth to a child but it takes a very special woman to be a mother. I honestly think the same can be applied for Fathers as well.

    Thank you for sharing your story. I'm glad things have since gotten better for you and will continue to get better and better with time!

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  • Great take, I hope things go alright with the case and you continue living a happy life with your mom, boyfriend and younger brother.

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  • I don't know if I should ask. But I always wondered why were you in your father's custody in the 1st place?

    They usually grant it to mothers

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