How Being A Conventionally "Pretty" Girl Has Affected My Life

I don't want this to sound like a cry of attention or as though I am proud, which is why I'm posting anonymously. This is not to be deemed as for any other purpose than to throw some insight onto what it's like to be a conventionally good looking female.

So here are ways conventional beauty has affected my life.

1) How It Has Affected Work

One day I got called into the office at my place of work. In fear that I had forgotten to complete a task or had accidentally broken something, you can imagine how caught off guard I felt when my manager and supervisor explained to me what the problem was.

They said that I couldn't wear a lightly padded or no bra when I came to work anymore. Not because it was offending anyone, or that I appeared less dressed than any of my co-workers, but because I might be turning on the customers and they were concerned that I might be targeted for stalkers and/or rape if I wasn't more conservative with my choices in undergarments.

Another day it was suggested by a supervisor that I stop being overly nice to customers because men might get the wrong idea and I, once again, may be targeted if I'm not careful.

The words "you're a very pretty girl, so we feel concerned..." were used in both circumstances.

Maybe if I weren't pretty, I wouldn't need to worry about being "targeted".


2) How It Has Affected My View On Men

When I was younger I knew that there were bound to be bad guys and good guys. I didn't have a distinct visual line between the two, but I knew one type would want me for my body and one type would want me for my soul.

But after a few smacks in the jaw by puberty and a little touching up to my wardrobe, I soon discovered as a teenager that most guys fall into the former category, specifically ones in my age range.

I have witnessed myself be considered just a girl guys want a crack at, rather than a friend to any guys. Guys I desperately wanted close friendships with turned me away when they realized I wasn't romantically interested in them. Because my friendship wasn't worth their time.

And with that in mind, I never know if a guy is holding a door for me out of generosity, or to check out my ass. And as funny as that sounds, it's actually pretty sad.

Maybe if I weren't pretty I wouldn't need to worry that a guy only likes me for my body.


3) How It Has Affected My View On Women

Women are naturally jealous of other women. I'm no exception to that. I will see a girl in a magazine or a pretty girl walking down the street and automatically dislike her because she makes me feel physically inferior, and I'm not ashamed to say that. It's just a psychological feeling that demands attention.

And with that in mind, I have felt myself lose multiple friends and gain multiple enemies due to girls feeling a similar way towards me. And that is also pretty depressing, because a woman shouldn't be jealous of another womans beauty, we should be supportive and respond with a "you go girl!" attitude.

Maybe if I weren't pretty, a girl wouldn't make a decision on our friendship status based on how much I intimidate her.

4) How It Has Affected My Family Members Views On Me

On more than one occasion, family members have made comments on my appearance. Usually along the lines of:

"You're such a pretty girl, you should go into modelling."

"You're such a pretty girl, you should get a secretary job at a law firm and snag a young lawyer."

"You're such a pretty girl, you should take advantage of that before it's too late."

Maybe if I weren't pretty, my family would have higher expectations of me.

Maybe if I weren't pretty, they'd suggest I become a lawyer.

5) How It Has Affected Strangers Opinions On Me

More often than would be expected, people automatically assume I'm not very bright. How could I be? With a pretty face like that, why would I need to be bright?

People automatically assume I'm not athletic. How could I be? With a pretty face like that, why would I ever do sports?

People automatically assume I need protection to go anywhere by myself. How could I be safe? With a pretty face like that, why would I possibly walk to the store by myself at 7pm?

Maybe if I weren't pretty, people would believe I know how to handle myself. Alone.


But hey, I should't be complaining.

I "lucked out in the gene pool", right?

I "don't have to worry about finding a man", right?

I "have a face other girls would die for", right?


But I guess the grass is always greener.


16|7
39|47

Join the discussion

0/2500

Submit

What Guys Said 47

  • 3mo

    For some reason people don't seem to get that first you like a person for their appearance and then you fall in love with them for their soul. You can't have one without the other.

    14|14
    0|0
  • 3mo

    I know I only hold doors for girls these days if they are on crutches, unless I want to check out their body close up. What better excuse than holding the door? Everyone thinks I am just being polite.

    But the serious aspect of this should be kept in mind. Girls are still pigeonholed, largely, based on their looks here in the good old USA. As she says in the Take, she has opportunities others lack, but those come with expectations and burdens--sleeping with the 'right' men, mainly.

    4|1
    2|0
  • 3mo

    This is what happens when you're pretty and you think that because you're pretty your life is gonna be perfect. When you encounter problems, aka life, you don't know how to deal with them and suddenly become a victim.

    0|0
    0|0
  • 3mo

    "But I guess the grass is always greener."

    That's really the key. If you were "average", you'd complain that you were plain and ignored and never got the attention that the pretty girls got. If you were legitimately ugly, you'd of course complain that you could never get a man, etc.

    Everyone - EVERYONE - has upsides and downsides to their appearance, as well as their other characteristics. You can choose either to focus on the negatives, or you can embrace the positives and have such a positive attitude that when the negatives inevitably surface, you are able to assertively dismiss them as being beneath you or irrelevant - or that you feel sorry for the person who has had to stoop to treat you that way.

    The choice is yours, but the first way will leave you depressed and miserable, and the second will keep you positive and happy.

    I used to be in the first group, but I eventually figured out that it really was a choice, and ever since then, I've been solidly in the second group, and MUCH better off for it.

    5|6
    0|0
  • 3mo

    im very good looking. i think u know what u have to do to navigate the sea of these fools. u have to remember u r rich and they r poor

    0|0
    0|0
  • 3mo

    do you always complain about stupid shit?

    0|4
    1|1
  • 3mo

    it's time more girls recognize that they are lucky if they're pretty but again... beuty ain't a merit. Society breeds this idea and i can see what happens. narcisism breeds monsters with an ego bigger than personality in itself

    0|1
    0|0
  • 3mo

    Please just be grateful that the situation could've been a lot worse.

    0|0
    0|1
  • 3mo

    You enjoy your life based on your attitude towards things; life is too short for such negativity! Be grateful for the things you DO have and you'll get a higher standard of enjoyment.

    1|1
    0|0
  • 3mo

    This is the most disgusting MyTake I've ever read. You have no idea how good you have it. You have so much power. Stop complaining.

    1|3
    4|1
  • 3mo

    Really the grass is always green can I see how much green it is

    0|0
    0|0
  • 3mo

    I used to work with a bloke who had women queuing up at his door. With him in mind I mulled the scenario of what it must be like to be attractive. It can't be very pleasant having a constant stream of unwanted attention from unsuitable members of the other gender, or the same gender for that matter; especially when that involves aggressive males. On the other hand, you will be used to it in a way that I can never understand. It will be hard wired in, part of who you are.

    The up side of being unbecoming is that you can do whatever the hell you bloody well like, day after day, year after year, while occasionally deflecting the over-enthusiastic friendliness of an elderly lady. This usually involves home baking, so what's not to like.

    Beautiful people do not have the best lives.

    3|0
    0|0
  • 3mo

    I'm not saying that being beautiful doesn't have its drawbacks. However, I believe the benefits outweigh the drawbacks.

    5|5
    0|0
  • 3mo

    Stunningly insightful.

    2|0
    0|0
  • 3mo

    Not trying to undermine you or anything..
    Nor am i saying that i dont understand or that these issues dont matter, but..

    First world problems..

    2|2
    0|0
  • 3mo

    Disagree to an extent on No 3 , women have a gender based solidarity that men do not have , girls / women may bicker & argue , but have far closer & stronger friendships with each other than men do. You could add to No 5 that you could be perceived as cold & bitchy , this may be a stereotype , but very often very attractive women are very ugly on the inside , they have become spoiled & conceited by everyone sucking up to them & over inflating their egos.

    0|0
    0|0
  • 3mo

    yes your friendship isn't worth our time. and thankfully you admit how twisted you women are hating on each other for being prettier than you.

    1|2
    3|0
    • 3mo

      Hey but don't men tend to hate on each other for someone being more well endowed than they are?
      weknowmemes.com/.../have-a-cold-glass-of.jpeg

    • 3mo

      mytake owner just stop already. I have learned to live with being a good looking male and you should learn how to live with yourself. Yes people see us in a different light opposed to average people. That does NOT give you the right to complain as if thats actually a problem. No matter what looks is the thing that gets us into the front door. If a man is not attracted to you he will show no interest unless you constantly cross paths such as a workplace

    • 12d

      Lol this arrogant 'pretty girl' is mad af. People probably don't like you because fo your arrogance.

  • 3mo

    Oh no, too pretty? It's like being too rich. Sooo much drama.

    7|4
    0|0
  • 3mo

    Don't be dumb. If you were ugly you'd be depressed.

    10|4
    0|0
  • 3mo

    Surprisingly all "anonymous under 18" girls claim to be beautiful...

    10|8
    0|0
  • More from Guys
    27

What Girls Said 39

  • 3mo

    Great take, very insightful. I can relate.
    But I still think that regardless, the conventionally attractive have it a lot easier than the conventionally unattractive.
    Just remember to always look on the bright side, and to count your blessings.

    5|1
    3|0
    • 12d

      You look pretty plain... not sure how you relate to it. You do know every girl is told by their family that she is pretty etc? And by their friends lol.

    • Show All
    • 12d

      Erm free speech... make me? What are you going to do? Nothing. If I has the chance to say this to you in person you wouldn't nor couldn't do anything.

    • 12d

      @Jamesol1 I'd walk away if this happened in person, so I'd never have to encounter you again. Unfortunately, the only sure way I can do this on the internet is by blocking you.

  • 3mo

    I understand everything you're saying, and I'm sorry you've been affected this way too. Many girls deal with this.

    4|1
    5|2
  • 3mo

    I can actually relate. Great take.

    3|0
    4|0
  • 3mo

    Great take.
    I'd definitely say the grass is always greener on the other side. it's human nature to want what you don't have...
    Your problems aren't any less of a problem than anyone else's, they may just be different, but they're still problems.
    I'm guessing people don't take these kinds of problems seriously because mostly... they just can't relate - and, as you said - the grass is always greener...

    http://i.imgur.com/0nUzGeS.gif

    3|0
    4|0
    • 3mo

      P. S. But ask yourself this: does your life, as you're living it now, have more positive things or negative things? If the answer is positive... then you're doing something right.

  • 12d

    I can somewhat relate.
    Used to be fat, and after the weight loss many of those things stated above has happened.

    0|0
    0|0
  • 3mo

    eh, life's too short to worry. Eat pizza instead :^) also fuck em! Who cares what they think? At the end of the day we live as we dream, Alone. You live your life by yourself, You die by yourself (speaking in terms of it's between You and Your Body) So why should you care about the other peeps in between? Live life with no worries about what others think... And also Pizza! \(^-^)/

    0|0
    0|0
  • 3mo

    There are downsides to every situation, but that doesn't mean you aren't still lucky to be blessed with conventional good looks. I get what you are saying, and I completely understand that those are difficult situations. But dealing with serious insecurities- feeling like you will never be noticed, never be enough, never find someone who will be attracted to you or appreciate you the way you are- that's really tough. Being asked by your boss to wear more clothes, or having annoying people suggest a modeling career- yes, those things are inappropriate and annoying, and I'm sorry that our society has put you in those situations. But if you think it holds a candle to being made fun of for your looks, or crying yourself to sleep because of all the things you hate about your appearance, think again. Nobody has it perfect, but physical attractiveness can open a lot of doors for you.

    1|0
    0|0
    • 3mo

      Also, there are lots of extremely attractive women who are also seen as intelligent and capable and are taken very seriously. Maybe it's time for you to think about what YOU can do to change how society perceives you. This isn't just about looks. If you want to be a lawyer, go be a lawyer. Just because nobody steered you down that road, it doesn't mean you can't choose that path for yourself.

  • 3mo

    This is really standard stuff in my opinion. I wouldn't say it "affected my life", is just how life is.
    For many people.

    Except that, even if I didn't work in a almost all men work environment, I would never go to work braless. I would die of embarrassment if someone had to point it out for me.

    0|0
    0|0
  • 3mo

    I wish I could complain about being pretty lol

    0|1
    0|0
  • 3mo

    hahahahaha wot is this?

    1|0
    0|0
  • 3mo

    For a while, I've felt like a hideous creature because Im not considered pretty. And its things like this that make my self esteem take a plummet. Trust me, it's better to be a beautiful girl than an ugly girl.

    2|0
    0|0
  • 3mo

    Women are naturally competitive and I've learned to deal with it. Pretty girls hate being pretty and ugly girls hate being ugly. Just be happy with who you are honestly.

    0|0
    0|0
  • 3mo

    when your ugly and can't relate

    6|0
    0|0
  • 3mo

    I go trough that too but my country is slighty different people are nice to (escpecially men) and even if I made a mistake and do something wrong at work peaople will always forgive me (boss and customer). Being beatiful have more advantage than bad sides

    1|0
    0|0
  • 3mo

    I get it... Im ugly

    0|0
    0|0
  • 3mo

    Seriously? You're complaining about being pretty? If you were ugly you would be sad. -_-

    0|1
    0|0
  • 3mo

    BRUH...

    @Posted.

    media.giphy.com/media/bhfqJZhRI4I2k/giphy.gif

    just take it and run.

    Least you ain't ugly.

    1|1
    0|0
  • 3mo

    Complaining about being pretty, really n*gga? 😑

    9|0
    0|0
  • 3mo

    Is GAG just for those suffere from PMS or Poor Me Syndrome and victim culture ie im a victim of my good looks lmao.

    6|1
    0|0
  • 3mo

    you read too much into it. u must not be affected by others' view of you... .

    0|0
    2|0
  • More from Girls
    19
Loading...