Beauty Confidential: Society's Beauty Standards

Beauty confidential: Societies beauty standards.

I'm not really good with titles, so that may not best describe what my take is about. However, I hope the title won't take away from the message of this take or my point. We're told everday how important looks are and that being attractive matters, especially if you want to find a mate. Men and women alike fear not being attractive enough or were told they were not or may have even been bullied about their appearence at one point in their life and now are insecure about their looks. When you see the beauty standards we hold everyone to, it just takes that insecurity and manifests itself ten fold. As human beings when it comes to life and looks, we all have it hard.

That being said, as a woman I can say women are held to a high standard or should I say there's a high standard of what a beautiful feminine women should look like. In every magazine, tv show, movie and even commericals we're told what's attractive and what's not. What men find sexy and what they don't, so we then hold ourself to that beauty standard and try our best to achieve it. Hollywood is the one place were looks reign supreme, where the most beautiful women exist. However, even they have things that they get picked on for.


Like for insistence, Erin Andrews. She's that chick from ESPN and she also co-hosts Dancing with the Stars and last night she said people on social media are always making fun of her nose. I thought " what's wrong with her nose? I've never noticed anything". Even someone as pretty as her has people making appearence comments


Continuing with the face let's talk about Patricia Arquette and Rumor Willis. Both have been judged for many things, Patricia apparently was told early in Hollywood that "you could be in Playboy, if you fix your teeth" and she said " Why would I want to be?". I've honestly never noticed anything odd about her teeth


Then there's Rumor Willis, people always said that there was something weird about her jaw. As a person with a jaw that didn't grow properly to the right side and wondering if people can notice it or not and constantly being told "it's not noticeble.". It's sad seeing someone get picked on for how their face ended up growing, isn't?


Another example is Charlotte McKinney, I confess I didn't know who she was until Dancing with the Stars. However she said she was bullied in school because of her body shape and quit because of it. So, even a woman who has a fit body women are told to have and big breasts we're told men want, is picked on. As women we really are screwed, huh?


Speaking of body, lets talk about that. One person who I've always admired for the way she handles critcism about her body, is Kelly Clarkson. She's always had weight struggles, but she always had the attitude of "if you don't like it, don't look at me" and I've always admired that. Even now, after having a baby people are picking on her and she still handles it well. I've always liked Kelly Clarkson and I think she's pretty and I don't think her weight is a big deal.


For a less famous example, let's talk about Bethany Mota. She's a YouTuber who does makeup videos and now I think designs clothes. She started her YouTube videos to boost her selfesteem after being bullied in school, hearing her story and how she felt. Sounds exactly like mine and how I felt, but I wonder why anyone would pick on someone so sweet and pretty. I don't get it


There's so many things everyday we as women, get picked on for. From, clothes, hair, makeup, weight/ body, face, etc. It's hard to feel secure in a world that is constantly making you feel insecure about everything. There's just so much pressure , it's no wonder there's people and companies taking time to show younger girls that no matter how they look, they're beautiful. It's why they advocate curvy women, so the ones that don't naturally weigh 95lbs even after having a child, see that they are beautiful too.

As women we need to lift each other up, not tear each other down. Because, we all deal with pressures of being beauitful. Beauty standards are something everyone is held to, even good looking people. We just have to find a way to love ourselves as is and hope other people will too!


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What Guys Said 15

  • Good Take, but you women are the problem of all this picking and bullying of a woman's body. Just go to a store and look at how many magazines for women are criticizing women's body. "(blank) has cellulite!!! OMG!!!" and this is the cover of the magazine. How can women expect to get over their insecurities when they buy this type of magazines?
    They say men define women's beauty (and vice versa) and yeah, it's kinda true, sexual selection, but most men aren't very picky when it comes to women's beauty, it's actually women who create insecurities on other women, most of the time.
    Stop reading magazines and listen to what men say when told what men like on a woman, you'll realize how your insecurities are stupid, and what's pushing men away is not your body, but your insecurities, well, that's the purpose of the magazines, to create you insecurities so that you keep buying them.

    Women are the solution to their own problem.

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    • Exactly this, i've been saying this forever lol. If women would stop feeding into this bullshit and doing it to each other then no one would be doing it them, it's such a viscous, sad cycle. Most men aren't nearly as hard on women as women are to each other and to ourselves.

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    • Uhh, actually lots of men I know are so brainwashed by the media themselves, that they won't go for a woman unless she's stick thin.

    • @dutchpride92 Some of them do, that's true, but it is most of the time women the ones criticizing other women's appearances. That's why women's magazines are full of gossip and shaming celebrities for their flaws, you never see that stuff in men's magazines.

  • Groove is in the heart. Someone can be what Madison Avenue considers beautiful and be evil and cruel. True beauty comes from within.

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  • I think the bigger question is, "Why are girls taking what the media says is beautiful and considering it the ultimate truth?" When guys everywhere have a different ideal of what is attractive. What guys consider to be a hot female and what a girl is considered to be a hot female are two different things.

    Now the flipside. Guys have the exact same thing happening, from Macy's/Old Navy/Calvin Klein commercials (especially the superbowl commercials) But we're not supposed to talk about it. But why is it that men aren't effected in the same negative way? Not to say that this isn't the problem, but I think there is something missing. Something bigger than "society/media tells us we need to be a certain way and it's too much pressure"

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  • Charlotte McKinney made me jizz in my pants.

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  • Holy crap, Charlotte McKinney is HOT! I seriously doubt anyone ever made fun of her for not being attractive enough. More likely, every guy desperately wanted to get with her (and I'm sure that's still true) and the girls were seething in jealously that this girl has a prettier face, nicer hair, is thinner and more fit, AND has amongst the best boobs in the world to top it all off! lol!

    As for Erin Andrews, I'm pretty sure there were WAY more comments about how great she looked naked in the video of her that leaked than there ever have been about her nose! lol!

    I like your take though. But I think a lot of the "news" about smoking hot celebs being "just like everyone else" is just a marketing ploy to make them relatable to the masses.

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  • Hey it's Erin Andrews!

    Hmmmm how did she get famous again... She was crying... a press conference... hmmmm? I forget.

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  • The 2nd to last girl is perfection wth is wrong with society!
    all these ladies are pretty regardless!

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    • Jealousy my dude.

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    • Well we don't know, in her school days she could have been fat, flat chested, had braces. Hat because your hot now doesn't mean you always were. You guys probably all know a girl who didn't blossom until after highschool

    • even if you threw all those things on her i think she would still be cute lol

  • I don't think body shaming skinny, fat, and any body type is good.

    That being said, beauty is in the eye of the beholder. What's attractive to one may not be attractive to another and that applies to both genders.

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  • they are lovely and hot looking.

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  • This hurts men more than women, because girls start to get ridiculous standards and men won't be able to keep up. Men for the most part don't care about these models.

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    • That's true, but women already have high standards for men, it's called survival of the fittest for a reason, go to any other animal species and you'll see that the only thing they look at is skin-deep.

    • @SSDSSDSSD I don't get guys on this site. When women yell at them for ogling their excuse is "why I can't help it, it's out instincts. Men are more visual than women you know". But when girls don't like them they go "women only care about looks", but I thought men were visual creature and women cared more about personality. But I guess "biology" only applies hen a girl calls you out on staring.
      Anyhow i feel that women find ourselves so unattractive and desperate that we date less attractive guys. Honestly I know more hot girl less attractive guy couples than the other way around. A women can have a speck on her shoulder and think she's the ugliest thing in the world, but a guy can have a keg and still think he's pretty good. If women's standards for men we're what it is for ourselves the population right now would be tiny

  • Shit Take to be honest.

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    • Don't like it, don't look at it.

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    • she means u shouldn't comment on it

    • @nikiroxs Why shouldn't I comment on it? I like the Take.

  • The thing is there are tons of guys who think all the women above are beautiful, and there are tons of girls that guys know in real life who are also beautiful. Lots of us guys want to let these girls know how truly beautiful they are, but you know that most of us can't do that unless the girl liked us back or thought we were attractive.

    Just putting that out there.

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  • Define beauty?

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  • Good take.

    It's the same with Jewel the singer (as an example). Her teeth are crooked (at least in '02... I haven't seen much of her lately since I don't keep up with that anymore). He teeth are what gives her that "X" factor.

    Point is that if women (or guys) accept and love who you are, someone is bound to love you for it). If you don't like something change it for YOU and not society.

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  • Well from a males perspective I find this article enlightening to say the least but this is nothing that I haven't heard before. The women I know are from a different cultural background if you will and it doesn't matter how much they workout, perm their hair, or loose weight - they will never fit in. I'm pretty sure that you've figured out by now I'm talking about AA women (African American).

    All of the pressure I hear from you and it makes me appreciate the experience of AA women that much more. In America or any country that actually rules their media outlets on what's beautiful and what's not - a country dominated by white women where posters, commercials, magazines, products we buy - a woman is white, very skinny and has big breast.

    Its extremely sad if you ask me - but for a woman who is white to say this - it just sent me into this idea of how bad it must be for women who are not white.

    On a positive note: I read just recently that Victoria Secrets is out selling bigger women material more than the skinny male shaped model types (3 to 1).

    I think the picture of those women that are supposed to be models - there shapes are horrible because they are shaped like men. I think that's why woman are starting to see this major trend adapt to women with bigger butts and more hips. Models have nice faces but their bodies are similar to males bodies. I've often wondered why most designers are homosexual men (which there's nothing wrong with) but they are designing clothing for women who are shaped in the form of men to which they are sexually attracted to.

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    • Please don't pity black women

    • as far as I know, models were originally "clothes-horses" - aka the skinniest frame possible to show off the clothing, not the model.
      I don't know much about the experience of black women (or other minorities) but I've heard that decades ago they had to use really harsh chemical straighteners and similar because only white hairstyles were "acceptable" in wider society. that sucked. I am terrible at hair stuff so I can't imagine having to deal with that daily, God forbid.

What Girls Said 13

  • I am my own beauty, if people can't accept it, then it's their problem, not mine :)

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  • The thing is, you're wishing for a perfect world - something we'll never have.
    Women are judged on so many things - their perfections and imperfections are observed under a magnifying glass and everything is portrayed as worse than it is.
    It's sad.
    People are mean.
    People - as much as they want to think themselves accepting and sweet - are more times bitter and angry.

    Most of the time no one takes the time to look into another's eyes to appreciate them as a person. It's all about the external person, all about the looks.

    Again... it's a sad world.

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  • Awesome take! I have been thinking of writing a take myself about body shaming. It's definitely an issue. You worded this well and I LOVE the Audrey Hepburn quote at the end :)

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  • I totally agree with everything said in this Take. And the part where you said that we as women need to lift each other up, not tear each other down, that really got to me. Women know better than anyone else how women are pressured into looking a certain way. Because we all live it! And I can't even tell you how many times I have seen either a friend post a picture on social media, or a video of a celebrity, or just a random girl on YouTube, just a woman with a really nice body. Like the kind of body that we are always told we should all have. And if that particular girl with a great body is wearing short shorts, or a crop top, or anything a bit revealing, everyone just goes crazy and comments on how she is a slut! I don't get it!

    But whenever there is a woman that is not considered attractive by society's standard, and she decided to take pictures in that same kind of revealing clothing, then everyone applauds her for her confidence. So all the thin girls are automatically sluts while all the bigger girls are automatically awesome even when they are wearing the exact same thing... That just really bothers me A LOT! And it's always women making those comments towards the other women! Why can't we all just support each other? So ladies, please stop calling each other sluts and just be nice to each other...

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  • Challenges are part of life. It forces a gift out of us.

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  • something i've realized is that no matter how beautiful you are, somewhere somewhere is going to find fault with you. so just live your life! just be happy! there's no sense in trying to please everyone, because it's never going to happen.

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  • The blonde girl looks like a ****. Of course men would like her.

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  • And men on this site often wonder why women are so insecure. As an unattractive woman, I am always shocked that even the prettiest women get criticized for their looks. I've been told most of my life that I am ugly by friends, family members and even strangers. So I believe it. Then I see women like the ones you posted and others get made fun of and they are gorgeous. Why do people have to nitpick at everything? If those women are considered "ugly" then I should put a bag over my head.

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  • Society's beauty standards is something that can never really be attainable naturally. Such as curvy hips, nice round bubble butt, prefect skin, long thick hair, tan skin, etc. this can easily be attained with photo shop or plastic surgery or makeup. I thought Beyonce was entirely perfect until those leak photos dropped.

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  • I watched a documentary called Miss Representation - it was interesting because someone said that the cosmetics and other industries - advertising - are *designed to make women feel insecure*. That was a lightbulb moment for me.

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    • Well of course it's designed women to feel insecure and they have achieved it - there's definitely nothing wrong with putting on a little bit of eyeshades and eyeliner to make your eyes pop but some women go through great lengths to look like something they are not and that makes me think what else she doesn't like about herself - I mean contouring the proper way can make your face look smaller - WTF and not to mention cellulite which a woman targeted other women to make them feel insecure about themselves and that was in the 1950s and even to this day women still care about that after doctors have proven its a good thing you need it

    • @belleza2 that's a good point about "what else doesn't she like about herself" - I still would like to be in better shape than I am but you know what, I look the way I look, and I refuse to put chemicals on my face every day (sometimes I do wear makeup but like 3x a year, for special events). I'm happy to just be comfortable and not worry so much about "looking perfect" all the time.

    • Then perhaps, people should stop watching these shows and perhaps television altogether. I hardly ever watch TV, because it mostly consists of programs that promotes fear, hate, insecurity and other things negative. I have found that there a lot of men and women out there, that even though they were not born with great genetics, they were still considered fairly attractive, because they'd look after themselves, by exercising and eating right, and above all, they were happy and comfortable with themselves.

  • This take is stupid. Patricia and romer are behind hideous. If even she fixed her teeth she wouldn't be hot
    Her face is just plain ugly

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  • beauty is in the ye of the beholder :) nice take

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  • Confidence is the biggest attractive trait, right?

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