Is she just stringing me along?

[Anonymous]

Okay, so we were kind of friends a few months ago (definitely initiated by her). We hung out a bit, and I was pretty sure she liked me. However, sh*t happened that kind of ended up separating us for a little while.

Examples:Her phone was broken for a while and I thought she was just ignoring me...I ended up being wrong, it was actually broken). Then I blacked out hardcore one night and I thought I really embarrassed myself in front of her, so I kind of shyed away from her whenever I saw her.

However, a few weeks ago I ran into her (she had no idea that I was in the area still). We talked a little bit and she told me to giver her a call. And a few days later I obliged. I asked her out to lunch the next day and she said sure, but she wasn't sure of her work schedule and said she'd give let me know when she was free. Suffice to say, she never called.

But then about a week later she sent me a Facebook message saying that she forgot to save my number and that I should text her still. Felt like BS, I know. Anyways a few days later I obliged. I let her know that I would be busy for a few days but I told her when I'd be free.

She responded a few days later, which was fine (albeit a little nerve-racking). And we had a some text small talk (I know texting sucks, but I guess that was her preferred method of conversation). I asked her when she was free and she said Tuesday around 5.

So Tuesday 5PM arrived and I gave her a call. Nothing. Over the course of an hour and a half I called her once more and texted her twice. Absolutely nothing.

The next day in the afternoon I found that she had called me in the morning and sent me a text. Since I missed her call she texted me saying she fell asleep after work and woke up the following morning and she asked if I was free that day..

This all happened like a week ago. I haven't responded because I was pretty p*ssed. I haven't heard from her again either.

So I want to know, was she just stringing me along and trying not to hurt my feelings? Like was she just providing excuse after excuse until I gave up? Or is it possible that she actually fell asleep and after she apologized felt like it was up to me to see if I was still interested after she f***ed up.

Sorry for all the text! I just felt like providing some context would help. I just want to know if she's worth pursuing at all anymore because I actually really like her and want to tell her how I feel...but I also don't want to do that if she's been trying to avoid me.

Yeah, she's just trying not to hurt your feelings.

No, she might just want to be pursued.

Updates

+1 y

Seems like I got my answer. Obviously not what I wanted to hear, but it realistically it makes the most sense and I now have the initiative to move on. Thanks a lot, everyone.

[misskiss17]

she's stringing you along.i've done it.a lot of girls enjoy feeling needed or loved by someone like that.i'm sure I''m going to get flamed for that one but it's true here's an example.let me make it clear first of all NOT ALL girls are like that.quite a few are though.

there's this girl that I absolutely loathe.we're talking, I wish I could use her as a target at a gun range.well, she used to string along my ex-fiance.she would ALWAYS complain to me how he annoyed her, he was always trying to date her blah blah blah.so I finally told her I'd talk to him.EVERY TIME I told her I'd talk to him she would say no.THEN when I started talking to him and we got serious, she freaked out and did everything in her power to break us up.she even went to the extent of trying to put her hands in his pants.

there was this other guy that wanted to marry me ,i had no desire whatsoever to marry him, but I liked having the option so I kept considering if I could ever love him.it was there.he could provide for me, everything but all I was doing the entire time was stringing him along because I didn't love him and deep down knew I never would.so finally I told him that nothing would happen.

chances are this girl will want you when you're gone though.we allllll want what we can't have;)

[That-Guy]

Good insight

[misskiss17]

Thank you:)

[Tamikaze]

Guys do this stuff too. People are afraid of looking like they are mean so they just keep trying to trump up excuses and explanations for making it impossible to get together. She is not in to you and you need to drop trying to contact her. Oh, and be prepared, she may continue to contact you here and there just because and it will drive you crazy. I had a guy do the exact same stuff and I later figured out he probably would have loved for me to have a FWB thing with him and that is why whenever we were going to have a regular date, well his phone would break, get lost, work would run late, etc., but then he would try to see if I would just come over to his place. I wouldn't but it doesn't stop him from contacting me every few months and playing this whole stupid game again. I realize she is unlikely to be trying to do this but she may enjoy stroking her ego by knowing you are still in to her.

[onemoreplease]

I don't know if I'd call it stringing you along, but it doesn't sound like she's super interested in you. It sounds like you did everything right to initiate something with her, and she hasn't been very receptive to the time and attention you've offered. Believe me, she probably has a pretty good idea that you are interested. Excuses are excuses, and if she really wanted to be around you then she would make the time or find a way to contact you. Cut her loose and spend your energy on a girl who appreciates it. If she comes around again, let her make most of the effort in contacting you and making the plans- she'll be happy to do so if she's worth another moment of your time.

[That-Guy]

I agree with the others, an important thing to understand about dating is this:

If people want to meet you, they will make time and the effort. If you find yourself not sure if she's interested or into you, keep that in mind. She probably doesn't really care and enjoys being pursued.