Whats wrong with me? why does it never work out with guys?

[Anonymous]

i feel like i'll never date and i dont know what to do about it. So i have never dated, im kinda seeing a guy right now, but unless somethings changes very soon i dont see us dating/seeing eacother anymore.

In my past i have almost only come across guys that only wants sex, and when they find out im not easy they are gone before i know it. I met this amazing guy (the guy im seeing) three weeks ago, even when i had givin up all hope, but just started changeing and i have no idea if he stil interested. He was so into me in the beginning, and now he either cares less or have just lost interest. Its very clear he isn't just after sex, so thats not the problem, but i just find him a bit confusing, like sending mix signals (in my opinion at least).

Anyway, if this doesn't work out im not going to be suprised, because nothing never works out for me. If its not their intetions i dont like, its their looks og behaviore. Im not perfect, im actually inexperienced and very insecure, and because of i know that sometimes and in some situations i can come across as indifferent and careless, when i do infact care, but i dont know how to react or how i feel about the situation (refering mostly to emotions and sexal wants etc) so i therefore dont say or do anything lol. So maybe its more that im doing something wrong then the actual guy... i dont know what the problem is and how to fix it.. it sucks not having any experience and ill neevr get better or more comfortable if i dont start... any advice?

[oldanddecrepid]

I understand things have not worked out in the past with other guys... but just based on the few paragraphs you provided above, it seems to me you have essentially doomed all of your relationships to fail.

Attitude plays a huge role in our relationships... if you bring your "baggage" (sorry hate that term) from other guys you have dated over the years that have not treated you well, then it can weigh down a new relationship. The worry is it could be a great guy that you are missing out on!

You need to stay positive about these other guys not treating you right. You look at it from the perspective of all guys are the same, they are not really into me which is the negative perspective. Instead you should be saying hmmm ya he was not the right one... but I have learned from my last relationship and I know what to look for in the next guy.

Quite often when one does not care or feel indifferent about finding another person, then they feel the same way about themselves. Perhaps it is time to take a break from trying to find a guy that will satisfy you and just satisfy yourself for a change! Concentrate on being you and making you happy... after all you can't make someone else happy if you're not!

[mychelle]

First of all, never pin the reason (unless it is quite clear) of any relationship failing solely on your own shoulders. It takes two, plain and simple.

Open communication between the two of you are what is important, seriously. Tell him just what you have shared with us. From there, his intentions should be a bit more clear to you.

Communication is so very key!!