Girls, what would you think if a guy said he's "doesn't plan on hooking up with other people" but wouldn't object to it?

We're not officially dating, we've only been seeing each other for about a month or two. He said that if we were sexually involved he wouldn't even consider hooking up with another girl, but if we weren't involved then he'd think it's okay for us to both see other people.

is it safe to say that he doens't actually have feelings for me, but sees me as a fwb?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • If a guy said that to me I wouldn't think he likes me very much. Why wouldn't he take that opportunity to try to make US official not say he'd hook up with another girl since we aren't together anyway? I've come to find out that if you don't know where you stand with a man then he doesn't take you seriously.

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What Girls Said 4

  • Since it's not official and you two aren't having sex, hooking up with someone if the opportunity strikes wouldn't be cheating.

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  • So if you guys are having sex then he is okay to commit, but if you aren't he wants to have sex with other people? I'm confused. So if you two were in a relationship and not having sex yet he would cheat? If thats the case don't bother with this guy. If he meant that if you two aren't together at all he will explore his options sexually or otherwise then thats fine. No harm there.

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  • Personally, i'd dump his ass, as he's clearly manipulating you.

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  • It does come off like he's trying to pressure you with the "I wouldn't object to it" like 'hey if you're not down with that I've got other options that I will take.'
    When you met him was he trying to look for someone to be in a relationship with? Did he ever say he really wants a girlfriend? If he did and he really is looking for a relationship he maybe be just trying to keep his options open, if you are not interested in that (he might not know how you feel about that or him?), and is letting you know he might hook up with someone else if they come along and that option is there. But if you used the word 'seeing' to describe your non-sexual situation with him so far and he used the word 'see' other people maybe he believes if you are not official it's ok to just date other people and is saying that hooking up with them may happen. But I feel like in that case, you need to find out if he only wants to 'hooking up' with people or just saying, he's not going to stop it from happening if it comes up, but it's not his intention to seek that out. I guess that only worth finding out depending on how into him you are, and what type of person he is. He could be a nice guy who worded that poorly, or a douchebag who's trying to pressure you into having sex with him so you can 'be official and not lose him to someone else'.

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