Girls, how would you feel if your boyfriend did this?

So to explain my question I need to add a bit of information about myself. I've had a hard life, being bullied, ignored by most people, had an abusive father who a few years ago killed my mom and then himself, I've always felt worthless rarely had any friends (none that lasted long) and a lot of other things that's a bit to detailed to bring up. But anyway, I'm saying this because I feel like when I do finaly find someone that I can be with and be happy with I will probably have one day that I just burst out in tears. I have those times when I'm alone and it feels like that having someone that is close to me would make me cry tears of happiness.
Sorry for the details, but my question is: What would you feel if your boyfriend cried for an hour or so in your arms just a week or two after you started to be with him?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Well I would hate that he'd been so unhappy before, but I would love that he trusted me so much that he could do that. I would hold him and stroke his hair and let him know that I wasn't going to leave him. If he wanted to talk then I would try and listen and be understanding, otherwise I would just be there for him and let him cry all he needed and tell him I cared.

    I'm sorry that you've been through all these horrible things :'( , I hope you find someone who loves you so much you forget how to feel worthless <3

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    • You really sound like the perfect girlfriend. I really wish that I'll find someone with your mindset. :)

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    • Neither of these are very healthy messages; and it's the kind of thing you see in the media all the time :/

      I can imagine it must have been :( . I'm glad you like where you live now :) . And you get on well with the guys you live with?

      Thank-you; that is truly one of the nicest things anyone could tell me :') . I really enjoy talking to you to; I really think you are lovely :) . I'd rather not come off Anon on here but my name on here is Tabbie if you would like to message me :) , I would like that

    • I sent a message which I hope was to you so if it is just respond to that. Otherwise just tell me here and I'll try to find you again. :)
      (I'll reply to everything you've written before this when I'm sure that I've found the right person.)

What Girls Said 5

  • That's rough. And I'm sorry you went through that, but I'm happy you're here now.

    I would absolutely support him and give him my literal shoulder to cry on.

    When a person who the world thinks should be broken and bitter by now can love and love strong, that's a wonderful thing.

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    • Thank you. I only wish that I could find someone to be with who would run away once I take of my mask of confidence and security.

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    • I know that I can't just wait around for someone to make me happy. I am doing things that I think will make me happy but time and time again I just get back into the old thoughts I have and that's why I worry about the time when I find someone. I'm afraid that I will have a relapse or what you'd like to call it and just go back into my depression.
      I am fighting against it and hopefully I'll be able to strong enough.

    • Sometimes you will fall back into those doubting ways. But if you find a good support team then it will get better and those moments of doubt will happen less frequently.

  • cried? for an hour? i think u need someone someone stronger than that.. cuz u have been through soo much..

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    • I have and am looking for help from professionals, but because I almost always wear a mask hiding my emotions they usually just end up saying "you're fine, you don't have to come here anymore". That's why I think a girlfriend would probably make me more emotional because I never get the time to take the mask of for the psychiatrist or whatever.

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    • hmm.. i m feeling sorry for you.. u seem like a nice person... dont let your past ruin your future.. make friends.. doesn't matter if one leaves.. make another one.. :) :) :)

    • Thank you. :)
      I am trying to make new friends and find someone to be with but it's just so hard when people judge you the first minute that you've met someone. I'm the kind of person that takes a bit of time to get used to. But I've been told that I'm awesome once you get past that. xD

  • I would hug him and wait for him to calm down. Then I would try to understand what's going on by talking to him.

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    • Would those kind of problems I mentioned want to date a guy less? If a guy had those things with him and probably cried quite often, would that make a guy worth less as a boyfriend?

    • No. I am always attracted to guys that need extra love and protection. So, I would probably be super in love.

  • First off you need to see a therapist I think you might have depression in which I don't at all blame you. Second I would comfort him and try to help him in every way I could.

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    • I have been going to several therapists for years but it usually just ends up with them saying "you're healthy so you don't have to come here" which I guess is because I'm really good at putting a mask on my face hiding my emotions. But anyway, thank you though. :)
      Also, you don't think that it would be annoying to have a boyfriend with that much behind him? That is what I'm most afraid of. That if I ever find someone they would only run away the second my mask came off.

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    • I wouldn't want them to do anything. All I want is a relationship with someone who I can be happy with. I just feel that if I showed my emotions and explained how I really felt she would start to see me as someone she needs to comfort every day. I want someone to be with me because they like me, not because they maybe see me as a kid who needs comforting.
      It's a bit silly I know but all the times that I've told someone how I feel they start to think of only that and not about the rest of me.

    • That's not silly I compleltly understand that. You don't want them to treat you any different or judge you because of what happened. I really hope you find a girl who loves you like you ask for.

  • I will be fine with it, as long as i know the reason why you cry.

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