Girls, If a previously chubby girl lost weight, is it ok for a guy to tell her that she is looking good now?

I just get a bit nervous when I go near the subject of women and their weight. I feel as if I give them that compliment, they would assume that I noticed their previous chubby state. For example, my psychologist started doing gym and she has lost weight and I wanted to tell her that she is looking good, but I feel I may offend her because it acknowledges that I did notice her weight previously. So generally, should a guy say something or just leave that compliment?

Updates:
You ladies are killing me with your mixed messages! Its yes, then hell no, then maybe, but say it this way. All good tips and I see the importance of context:) But yeah... mixed bag on this one.

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21

Most Helpful Girl

  • I mean, compliment her on her accomplishment in the gym. You guys are at the same gym, right? I didn't quite understand the sentence about the gym. But I say think about what you're complimenting her on.

    But a lot of women DO get offended when someone they knew, that never complimented them before, compliments them once they've lost weight. It's like the person couldn't see past the extra weight.

    That being said, compliments generally do make people feel good. Just understand the above paragraph still applies.

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What Girls Said 20

  • Most woman who are chubby or fat and have lost weight will not be mad at someone noticing. She is making an effort to lose weight and having someone tell you your hard work is paying off makes you feel good. If you don't want to be blatantly obvious you can just tell her how good she looks. :-)

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  • Bring it up as a question "Have you lost weight?" And if she's started going to the gym she will take this as a big compliment. She probably will mention her time at the gym and than you can compliment her and say she looks good. Not ending with 'now' because than you make a before/after comparison. And that ain't good!

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  • Just tell her she looks really happy lately and you hope her life is going well for her.

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    • Ha ha, thanks but how does that relate to her weight? she always seems happy. But in general, can guys give these compliments?

    • Show All
    • Thanks, but that's the hard part. You want to be nice and just compliment her but there is all these underlying tones 😫

    • That's why you don't compliment her weight. You compliment her health and since it would be weird to be like wow is your sodium lower? It better to go with obvious general things. In this situation your relationship is basically professional so you go with general observations that DO NOT involve her weight or age.

  • Honestly I don't like it.

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  • It's nice to hear. I think you should. It'll make her feel even better about her transition😊

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  • I don't like then people bring up what I looked like in the past. It's so awkward and it feels like a backhanded compliment.
    But if you feel like she will be okay with it, then go ahead.

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  • Hmm id be happy but I'd think "so before i was ugly" now that she lose the weight she's going to get attention from guys who didn't even take a second look at her... So when you give her that compliment she's just going to think another guy whos all of a sudden interested in me just cause of my weight lose especially if you never talked to her before or paid any attention

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  • Just compliment her, say that she looks beautiful or she's looking nice today or something. Even though she might like it that you've noticed her weight loss, she might feel like you didn't previously like how she looked because of it :) Just compliment her appearance in general and you will be fine (:

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  • yes.. i think you shd tell her..

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  • just don't place too much stress on the 'before and after' aspect. just say 'you're looking good lately'

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  • Find a way to passive aggressively compliment her on it. Don't straight up be like "oh her you look super good now" bc when you say that to a girl (goes for anything/ any new changes they've made) she'll think of the past and will be like wow I really was ______. Sure girls love compliment on looks but if we've modified ourselves and you compliment us on it directly there's a little part that will dwell on what we looked like before and it hurts.

    Don't know if this made sense but

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  • No, if she's working out she's obviously trying to improve her body. Complimenting her will tell her that her work is paying off. Just say she's looking 'even better' lately. That will balance things out if you're worried.

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  • You could say.. "You look these days.. I can't tell, is it new haircut or new makeup routine?"

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    • But as a gym bunny myself, she has really done well and I like want to give her credit there without being vague about it.

    • Then do it.

  • she would appreciate you noticing the changes

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  • Compliment her the way you compliment other girls, so that she doesn't feel left out or insecure. :)

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  • There isn't a better compliment for a woman that's worked hard for her body to hear. Go for it!

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  • Yes you could tell her. Girls likes being noticed.

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  • Don't focus on the weight; even though you do notice the weight loss just compliment how happy she looks. If she opens up or brings it up, then you can probably say she looks great and appreciate the hard work she put in.

    I lost 130 pounds (I had a disorder that made me swell up like crazy for years) and suddenly that hormone and gland stopped being evil, so I just dropped all the weight and am back to where I was at 128 pounds. I worked my butt off and ate healthy (still do), but nothing I did made me lose weight before, I just kept gaining. Still, nice to know my toned body and good health now was well worth the effort and hard work.

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    • Did u lose it with healthy eating and exercise? I think I have that hormone evil thing

    • I don't think so. I mean I was always exercising and played sports, still gained weight. I cut all junk food and soda and for 3 years still gained weight. Then last year I kept doing what I was doing and started shedding 5-10 pounds a week and getting back to my regular size. I still lose around 5 lbs a week. It was really weird. So many doctor visits and tests...

  • Bad idea, she will think you are hitting on her.

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    • I don't think so... In general if a guy says that, is that hitting on her or complimenting her? I just don't want her to think that I thought she was chubby before hand (or noticed it at least). It's hard lol

    • Just keep your mouth shut on this. Seriously she's your psychologist... your punch ball practice for pick up lines.

  • Why do you have a psychologist?

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    • Im a 32 yr old on GAG... and im a regular... you need anymore than that;) I have BDD and anger issues if you must know.

    • Lol xD sorry for being nosey. Women love compliments, she'll appreciate that someone noticed.

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