If a person is use to getting bullied, like physically beating, does that person have something to be ashamed about?

I'll use me for example, during my childhood, I use to get bullied all the time, cause I was quiet. Kids use to treat me like a punching bag, and I didn't fight back most of the time, "out of fear", years later (which is this year) on my job, I met up with one of the people who use to make my senior life in highschool miserable (which was back in 2002), he did apologize but I felt like I need more than just that... I wanted to get some closer in my life so out of revenge after I was pretending to be cool with him by shaking his hand, I spit on him, then after words he kept shoving my head over and over out of anger. I didn't shove him back just to see if I could get away with spitting on him, without getting fired, but I got fired anyway. Well the way I see it, even though it seem like once again I've gotten beating up, at least I prove to that person, I'm no longer afraid of him, cause you never let anybody run over you.

So tell me, due to the fact that I let him shove me and I didn't shove him back, does that make me look like the same pathetic wimp that I was in school years ago, despite the fact that I did spit on him?

Another reason why I did it well back in 2012 when he met me on the job I use to have, when he apologize for how he use to treat me, I didn't accept it cause when I saw him have a smile on his face, I thought he didn't take me seriously, so the next day at that time when we met again at my job, when he learn I didn't accept his apology, he ask someone to use his cell phone to take a picture with me and him in it, I said no, but he force himself to do it anyway. I let him get away with cause I was on my job, knowing I didn't want to draw attention to myself... after words I did say bad stuff to him on Facebook, then I realise that's not the same as getting a little revenge in person.

You're thinking why can't I just meet him at his home, well he no longer lives in my town, he lives way out o

  • A.) no you're not a pathetic wimp, you already spit on him so be satasified despite that you didn't shove his head back
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  • B.) you are pathetic, even though you did finally stood up for yourself a little after all these years
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And you are? I'm a GirlI'm a Guy

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Most Helpful Guy

  • i feel u bro... although i cannot blame people who used 2 bully me in da past, coz i admit i was a fuckin retard back then. i really wish i could go back in time and teach some lesson 2 my retarded then-self

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    • Describe to me how did you use to get treated?

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    • That job was only having me do 1 hour a day anyway, plus when one door opens another door opens up. He didn't think I had it in my, when I use to say back stuff towards him on facebook, he just laugh at me, due to him not laughing when I spit on him, I guess I should be proud that I got under his skin, even though I didn't shove him back

What Girls Said 4

  • A lot of people who are bullied try to seek revenge. Some actually get it, but what does it really prove? That you've changed?

    The more mature thing to do would have been to accept his apology and move on. You forgive other people for your own benefit - not theirs. It will only hurt you to keep holding on to anger from the past. Accepting an apology doesn't mean forgetting what happened or allowing that person into your life, but it closes the issue.

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    • Should I still feel like a wimp for not shoving him back, even though I did spit on him? I know I shouldn't of did it, I was trying to prove a point, by letting no one treat me like a doormat.

    • Fighting like children is cowardly in and of itself.

  • No, it's bullies that are worthless waste of oxygens. Though, I would have just walked away if I were you.

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    • I just didn't want him to think he can get away with how he use to treat me any kind of a way and I just use to take that, at least this time last month I took some kind of action in person. He didn't think me of all people had that in me

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    • Not exactly but I think he might be thinking that he got the reaction he wanted from you, which is your anger and thus spitting at him. Bullies mainly look for that: reaction. If you give them that, they feel as if they still have the power to control part of your life even after many years later.

    • but I could also look at it like this, at least this time he got angry and now I'm kind of laughing

  • You're an idiot, spitting on someone.. Really mature. Sounds like he grew up into a different well rounded person and you grew up to hold a grudge and not know how to resolve your differences like an adult. You're over 30 ffs grow up

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    • Maybe so, but back in school I didn't do nothing to defend myself against him, but instead let him think I didn't have a backbone, I wanted to prove to him that I don't fear him anymore, just to make things kind of even. He use to laugh at me... with him getting angry for me spitting on me, I wanted him to know how it feels. It's what you call karma

      Do you think I should live in shame for not shoving him back, after he was shoving me?

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    • *ahem* child! Make all the judgements about me u like. I know the truth. You are dwelling on the past and getting your silly little version of revenge. But really you've just made yourself look petty.

    • At least I didn't kiss my ex-bully's behind.

      Also in that movie the "Butler" it takes place in the 1960's it showed a group of black college kids entering a diner shop, they decided to sit in the area that's reserve for whites only, they refuse to sit in the black area spot in that shop. So the young white college kids got angry by trying to physically force the black college kids out of the seats and one white girl spit in the face of a black girl, but the black girl didn't do nothing back to the white girl, do you think the black girl look pathetic?

  • Not your fault at all!

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    • Should I be proud of myself that I did stand up to him even though I didn't shove him back?

What Guys Said 3

  • Sure you spat on him, but you still let him physically abuse you. Nothing's changed in my eyes.

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    • All because I was at work, now if I wasn't at work, then that's a different story. Don't you think me spatting o him is better than being afraid of him, like how I use to be?

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    • one more thing I want to add... last month, I know I could of ask his mom to use my cell phone to take a picture of me with him in it, but I figure, well he'll just find that funny and agree to the picture, so that wouldn't be a good enough revenge, "knowing back in 2012 when he forced himself to be in a picture with me, I was against it and mad"

      That's why I choose to spit on him, just to get him mad.

    • I also forgot to mention this, I'm not always a doormat, when I work for walmart, I didn't get alone with another co-worker, that person would find any excuse just to harass me, so one day out of anger I threw a plastic empty water bottle at that person face, and he didn't do nothing about it just stood there.

  • you should have shoved him back and punched him in the face

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    • Should I feel embarrassed that I didn't? Like I'm just a sorry excuse of a man.

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    • umm thanks?

    • Also after I spit on him, I could of also ran to avoid getting shove by him, but I stood my ground. I didn't shove back cause I didn't want the cops to get involved.

      The reason why I said I like your later comments cause JSmuve thinks nothing has changed in his eye's like I'm still that same pathetic boy who was walked on, and not taken seriously. My ex-bully use to treat me like I was a tool for him to play with.

  • Find anger and turn that into strength. Go to a gym. Take up Karate or Kick Boxing.

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