Can you ever learn to like children and the idea of marriage?

My sister had a kid and today she turned 1 and I should love my niece but I just don't lol. It's like everyone talks about how some day I'll be a father and settled down and I can practice on my niece yet I don't see the joy of having my own family. Like I never see myself going home to my wife and kids and I guess I'm young and most men in my age range don't see themselves settled down but i just hate the thought of a love and having my own family.


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Most Helpful Girl

  • I had a kid when I was in your age range.
    And I <3 him to death!

    It's okay to not be ready for kids of your own... or even a family.
    But to not love your niece...
    I think that's pretty weird and uncommon.
    She's your blood... you should!!
    That should be natural.

    When I was far younger than you... I could always picture myself marrying some day and having kids.
    I find it strange that you can't even visualize that now.
    Perhaps, you never want kids?
    If so, that's okay.
    But eventually the dating girl after girl phase gets old.
    You'll want someone eventually to be with forever (even if you don't reproduce)

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    • I think she's cool but she's just a baby and she has only seen me 3 times in a year and doesn't even recognize me.

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    • Well I guess I don't have that paternal instinct and soul to really care for people.

    • Thanks for mho

What Girls Said 5

  • Most people never change on things. I mean some people could get used to that idea. Though the chances are probably low.

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    • Well I've seen marriage my siblings are both married by 20 and have been together with their SO since 16. They are 27 now and happy. I am more the get wasted with a few friends and go to the club and act a fool.

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    • I've never been on a date tbh all my experience with women have been flirting at clubs and if I'm lucky they end up coming to my place.

    • If that is what makes you happy then keep doing it. Don't try to change just because of what everyone else is saying. Only do it if your wanting to and if you think you might be happy. Best to live up your youth and YOLO! :)

  • Sometimes your mind might change. Sometimes it doesn't. Whatever works for you is fine.

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  • I don't want a kid of my own either :p but I love babies.

    You will learn to like the idea of marriage of you educate yourself about it.

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    • Well I just don't want to have to have be responsible for another life whether it be my wife or kid. I just want to go home after work and chill not to a household of a screaming kid and woman yelling in my ear to make dinner or watch the kids.

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    • I smile when I'm out at the clubs and flirting around but it takes me 4 or 5 drinks to really get me to relax and flirt then I act happy. When sober or in a professional setting I stay even keel.

    • No, you need to smile more when you are sober not just drunk.

  • I love my freedom tooo muccchh..! :)

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  • You might, but that doesn't mean you will.
    Having kids or a family isn't for everyone.

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    • Well I am the type of guy to get home from work or class and sit down and watch TV or go out for a few beersti destress. In my experience women and kids ruin that for many men who decide to go that route.

What Guys Said 3

  • I was very neutral about it and once my other family members and friends started having kids I started to see I wanted them less and less. Not everyone is meant to be a parent or settle down. Do not worry or feel guilty if you do not want this lifestyle.

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    • It's just I need to have my time to hit the beers and relax, I dont want to have to be so responsible all the time. I need to work and be professional but acting so responsible all the time is tough.

    • I agree totally. I never had the natural desire or "want" to have any kids. I kinda thought they are a lot of work too and generally annoying anyway. My life is full and complete and totally enjoyable without kids. I have no regrets!

  • Oh maybe not now... everyone needs love
    love has multiple forms

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  • no, i don't ever want children.

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    • I don't want to ever be responsible for anyone but my self.

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