How can I make this feeling go away?

So the past two months I've gone through a lot with friends and guilt with treating one of them like trash. I got super mad and treated my friend Alex like trash for 3 weeks. When i said sorry he said it was ok. But then I went through 7 weeks of non-stop guilt before I couldn't take it anymore and decided to show that I needed help. I talked to Alex and he said to make it up to him was to forget about it and never let it bother me again. And i didn't. But then a week or more after that I had this emotional meltdown and I felt like nobody cared about me anymore, and that all of my friends would abandon me, so to make the emotional pain go away, I cut myself on my upper left arm and shoulder. I told my friend Jack and he helped me through that week and got me the help I needed. But recently I keep going through that meltdown and keep getting closer to cutting again. Its like I black out for a split second and the next thing i know I'm hold a pair of scissors to my arm. I want to tell Jack or one of my friends but I dont want to worry them. So how can I make this feeling go away?

Updates:
I'm extremely terrified of this feeling, and I don't want to break my promise to Jack by cutting again, but sometimes I feel like it would solve everything if I did cut again.

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What Guys Said 1

  • maybe you should tell your parents how you are feeling

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What Girls Said 1

  • I think you need to see a therapist. It sounds like you have serious abandonment issues and need to cope with the fact that some people are in your life for brief moments. This is reality.

    You also need a good support group and your friends seem to be that way. I would tell them.

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    • I've had a therapist for a couple of years now and thank you for your advice I will tell my friends about this.

    • You're welcome. If that therapist doesn't seem to be adequately dealing with your issues, I would suggest changing to a different one. And school therapists/counselors should be adequately qualified to assist you as well.

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