How do I manage the house and finances after my parents disappear?

So I'm 29 years old and had a brain tumour removed as a child and my parents would not let me learn how to drive a car or how to cook. They told me if I tried to learn on my own, they would kick me out of the house. When I was 18, my mother would not let me get a job so I didn't enter the work force until the age of 21. Right now my mother has very serious heart problems that haven't been diagnosed yet and my dad is losing his mind. Today he forgot about his work meeting, forgot to take his umbrella home from the hospital and forgot one more important detail while we were on his way home. My dad does not forget things. I think his mind is going haywire. I don't know how to manage the house because my parents would not let me do anything while they were normal and healthy. What do I do? I was thinking of hiring somebody to teach me how to cook, how to hook up the internet, how to drive a car and using the money my parents give me to do it.


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Did they think they'd be around forever? I know you had a serious issue but they did you a real disservice by not letting you adapt to day to day skills. Was that your only tumor or major health problem?

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What Guys Said 7

  • That sounds like a good plan but you don't need someone to teach you to cook. I taught myself. I get on the internet for recipes and then tweak or modify them some to make them good for me. After a while you'll start to recognize how flavors blend and know what spices are needed or too much of etc

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  • Begin by talking to your mother and tell her your concerns. You need to feel confident first and foremost in paying household bills. And you need to be able to get groceries etc. Maybe this will be by driving, maybe using Uber or taxi's or public trans.
    If you can't get comfortable with doing these things (e. g. your parents won't allow it) and your mom dies you'll need to get "power of attorney" assigned by a court so you can manage your dad's household. A lawyer can help you with this. Beyond this you can get classes to teach you a lot of this stuff. A social worker can hook you up with tons of resources.

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  • ugh... that's sad :/

    sorry but i don't understand y they didn't let u... weren't u supposed u should learn 2 take care of basic things on yer own?
    anyway there r simple foods u can cook easily (like past or rice) . car's not essential though. if u can afford 2 pay someone 2 teach u how 2 cook would b good. also u can buy pre-cooked food as well :)

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  • Your friends can definitely teach you this stuff! I've helped out friends with things like cooking, and managing finances.

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  • Have you no friends or extended family members to ask advice off

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  • Rouxbe. com will sort out your cooking skills. Everything else is just a google away. The most important thing is to make sure you'll still have a steady income if something bad happens. Money can solve most problems.

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  • Watch food network and on youtube you can search how to do a lot of things. Watch who you trust, they might try to take advantage to get whatever money they left you.

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What Girls Said 2

  • I know this will sound big headed but it's not too hard to learn. I think you are afraid of the unknown and everything is unknown. So I completely understand why you are scared.

    Make a list. Between people here, the internet and friends and professionals, you will be okay.

    Prioritise what you would like to learn first. Out of the things you aren't allowed to do what would you like to do first? as your parents get iller they will want your help and if you aren't too ambitious with doing everything at once they are likely to let you and either help you or leave you to it.

    I'm sorry for everything you've had to go through and going through now

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  • Voice your concerns to your parents and put an effort into acquiring a stable job. Everything else can be fixed.

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