How do I become more manly?

I'm an effeminant guy and I hate it with every ounce of my being.


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Most Helpful Girl

  • You must be swift as a coursing river,
    with all the force of a great typhoon,
    with all the strength of a raging fire,
    and mysterious as the dark side of the moon... :)

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What Girls Said 6

  • Never hate yourself. You have done nothing wrong. Societal standards of manliness are outdated and changing.

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  • I think the main problem here is your confidence. Don't be afraid of what people think first of all, that's a big step. But if I'm honest... I really don't see what's wrong other than that you need to accept and love yourself. You are a beautiful person and I don't need to see you to know that. I want you to know that being someone you aren't will attract people that you don't actually want. Be brave and be who you are, wear it on your sleeve and never, ever back down. Don't let people's thoughts, words, and stereotypes slip through your cracks. Remember that there are many people out there that will accept you and all you need to do is wait. Sometimes you can't find them now because it's not time, and sometimes you can't find them because you aren't open enough. I think this is more of an issue of self-confidence and self-love along with trust. This may seem like crazy talk but you should never try to change who you are because of others.

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  • Carry women when their heels are hurting their feet.
    Open pickle jars for us.
    Be dominant in bed.
    Be protective of your girl.

    Peace out.

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  • Kill a mountain lion with your bare hands.
    Become a lumberjack.
    Grow chest hair.
    Don't shave your beard.
    Don't wear flip flops.
    Only wear steel toed boots.

    Just fucking with you. Don't try to change yourself. I know a lot of feminine men that are great guys.

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  • Your every second word must be "manly", duh~

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  • What's your definition of "manly"?

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    • Someone who is strong physically and mentally. But I don't think that's what it really means.

    • Well, if you don't feel physically strong you could start an exercise routine to build your muscles and feel healthier.

      Mentally you need to see your positive aspects and focus on them. If you keep feeding into the things you don't like it will not help. If you feel you aren't confident you could search of ways to build your confidence and self esteem.

      With all this said, there are millions of different types of people out there and the proverbial "manly man" as you see him just might not be who you are, and that is not a bad thing at all.
      Your best best course of action is to figure out what you do like about yourself and build from there. By hating who you are is only counteracting any progress you hope to make. It's like trying to help someone lose weight by calling them a fat lazy slob, it's counterproductive.

      I hope that makes sense. It's sounds cliche but you need to start by learning to love who you are. I hope you figure it out and grow into the man you want to be! GL :)

What Guys Said 13

  • Well, start by getting more muscular (unless you already are). Stop giving a shit about petty stuff, and go for what you want, be ambitious and confident, but remain humble. Treat people with respect and demand respect. If you want to become "stereotypically manly" learn how to fix stuff and get into cars.

    It's basically just how to become a better person overall cause this could also apply to women.

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  • when you say manly, you mean by societal expectations?

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    • Yes, but not material things like money.

    • I thought about it.. hmm im not even sure. I was gonna say getting somewhat muscular for the visual aspect of it, but other than that im drawing a blank. I suppose also having a boss job.

    • and also invest in hobbies that are considered manly? but honestly if none of this fits you then don't do it. be yourself.

  • Do whatever the fuck you want to do and don't let other's opinions stop you. Sure, take them for consideration, but live your own life. Stick up for what you believe in. Stick up for those you care about. Lastly, don't give up in the face of adversity, keep pushing on even if you think you'll lose.

    That is what it means to be a man, not protein shakes or sleeping with every woman in a club.

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  • You are who you are, just roll with it and be cool in your own skin bro! Thats how confidence is acquired.

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  • Acquire gains.

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  • go to the gym and lift. the testosterone from that will do the rest xD

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  • I don't know. Ask a man who's a man.

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  • Force yourself into situations where you have to be manly

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  • LIFT SOME HEAVY ASS WEIGHTSSSS

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  • You can chop woods. It increases testosterone.

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  • Play sports, so more physical things rather than at home on gag.

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  • Beat someone up?

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  • Well, I've actually noticed that the character James Bond is written to have a lot of tastes one might consider feminine, but you wouldn't consider him effeminate for a minute because he walks with a swagger, has an authoritative voice, is strong, etc. You can have so called feminine tastes but not be any less manly. It's all in how you carry yourself. If you want to look the part of being manly I suggest working out. Otherwise, just walk with confidence and assert yourself. You don't have to get buff, shave your head, wear wraparound Oakley's, and talk like Tom Waits to be manly. Effeminate men tend to get props for being caring and all that, you also don't have to lose that in your quest for manliness. It's best to have a mix of traditional manly stuff and more feminine stuff, too much of either isn't good.

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