Roommate conflict - who's in the wrong and what should I do?

My roommate and I share a dorm room at my school. She’s a sophomore and I’m a senior. We were randomly paired together for summer housing and didn’t know each other before. She’s normally great and I enjoy rooming with her, but we had our first conflict this morning.

I went to bed around 10 last night thinking she would be spending the night with her boyfriend because her summer class gets out at 9 and she usually goes right back to our room after. Around 10:40, I heard the door unlocking. I’m a light sleeper and a little jumpy, so I sat right up. She opened the door and entered the room with a guy. He walked right across the room, dropped her stuff off, and then left the room. I was pissed because I sleep in a sports bra and very short shorts. We don’t have an air conditioner and we already agreed that we both don’t mind if the other one sleeps in underwear. When this guy walked into the room, he saw me with barely any clothes on. I was pissed. After he left, I went back to bed.

This morning I confronted my roommate about it and she told me that he didn’t see anything and that I have no reason to be upset. I asked her to give me a heads up when a guy is going to stop by, even if it’s just to drop some things off, just so that I can make sure I’m dressed. She got defensive and told me that I should give her a heads up when I’m going to bed. She said she didn’t know I was in there (which she probably didn’t) and acted like I was stupid for thinking that she would’ve driven 40 minutes to spend the night with her boyfriend when she had to work today.

I feel like I should be able to sleep in the room without having to worry about giving her a heads up because it’s my room too and sleeping in a dorm room is what it’s meant for. On the other hand, inviting guests over, even for a few minutes, is random, unexpected, and can be a violation of privacy (like last night). Do you think she’s in the wrong here or do you think I am? How would you handle this situation?

  • Your roommate is in the wrong.
    100% (3)100% (2)100% (5)Vote
  • You're in the wrong.
    0% (0)0% (0)0% (0)Vote
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  • your rommate is.

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