How do you make car rides not... awkward?

I have to go on like, a 15 - 30 minute car ride later today, as a passenger no less, and I'm just.. kind of an awkward person.. I absolutely hate small talk, but it's kind of rude to be on my phone and basically ignoring the other person. They insisted on driving, unfortunately, so I'm kind of stuck. It would've been MUCH better for me if I could have been the one to drive us, because I could at least pretend I was hyper-focused on the road and use that as an excuse.

Help me I'm so awkward 😭


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Throughout the journey, certain thoughts will bubble, triggered by the situation (which in turn, is triggered by your conditioning - how you react to certain external stimuli). The thoughts will in themselves, create certain sensations, be it awkwardness, embarrassment, shyness, self consciousness, 'cringiness'. Given you will deem these thoughts and sensations unpleasant and awry, they won't make you feel good, so you will repress them, ie try and avoid them, or act out rashly (ie trying to make conversation, even when it's not natural at that precise moment).

    My advice would be to watch your thoughts and sensations, be clear about the thoughts that arise, even write them down afterwards (until you are comfortable making mental notes), because it will the same thoughts that pop up in different situations. Do the same for your sensations. Feel about the sensations, try and understand their essence, their shape, and then start to label them, as best you can, embarrassment, anxiety, worry, etc.

    Once you are clear about what thoughts and feelings you are having, you can A) start to understand what thoughts are creating your sensational inner reality, and B) start to rationally think about whether they are justifiable in that situation.

    So even on the topic, how you worded it, is elucidating in itself. How can you make a car journey not awkward? Already, you've decided, that 1. The car journey will be awkward 2. That you're responsible for said awkwardness 3. that there is something inherently awkward about you. 4. you should try and fore-control the awkwardness in a given situation 5. you should direct energy towards this end.

    Once you see the process of these thoughts creating your consciousness, as I say, the next step will be to decide, if these perceptions are valid. So for point 1, if you decide your journey will be awkward, surely, by virtue of the fact that you think it will be awkward, it will be, because you're going to be hyper sensitive about any 'misdemeanour' in your behaviour, are are insistent that the other person will be thinking towards the same ends (of course, it's probable that they are perceiving the situation entirely differently).

    Follow this process to its natural ends, and you can unravel human consciousness, and become enlightened, if you like. You don't have to though...

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Most Helpful Girl

  • When there is that silence, just enjoy it. Don't dwell on it. Car journeys are easier because you drive past so much stuff you can comment on, bad drivers, road works, traffic lights, funny looking pedestrians, which way to go...

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What Guys Said 13

  • I would just put on some music. honestly though when the moment comes it probably won't be so awkward and you two will just be chilling.

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  • Just put some music on and stare out the window lol I rarely ever even talk when I am the passenger in someones car. It's never bothered me, I usually just close my eyes and nap lol.

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  • You can have amazingly deep conversations on road trips. Deep inner secrets and insights and musings.

    Or you can just fall asleep.

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  • Tune the car radio to some talk host and explain what a asshole the guy is.

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  • The color Game me and my team always play it first one to find a van of a specific color get to hit someone in the car

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  • Just bring up anything to talk about..

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  • Simple! Start a conversation... And go with the flow!!!

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  • Try big talk instead of small talk.

    Or just play slug bug.

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  • Oh I could feel the awkward cringe about to happen. #CanRelate

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  • Try and sell him real estate.

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  • It's 15-30 min how can you run out of things to talk about in that short amount of time.

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    • Because I don't have anything to talk about in the FIRST place. All I friggin do is work and sleep, I have a dull ass life.

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    • My cousin. But we're not... close. It's a cousin I see strictly on holiday's.

    • 15-30 min car ride. Here is what you do.

      You get in the car
      Hey! How have you been?
      They something then then ask you how you've been
      You answer
      So whats new? Hows your job/school going?
      They answer they ask you the same thing
      You answer
      What ever they say that sounds interesting ask about it
      Drive is over.
      The end.

  • I just scream out the word PORNO! Through out the long ride. Now instead of enjoying the silence your going to have to hear the word PORNO!

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  • If it's a guy blow his dick? I don't know.

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What Girls Said 6

  • I know this is late but I usually say random facts. It throws people off and makes them laugh. Like let's say the sun is shining extremely bright. I'll say "It took only 30,000 years for the sunlight to escape the sun, 8 minutes to reach us, and 30 seconds to make me wish I never stepped outside the house."

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  • Try catching up about everything that's happened in both your lives since your last Holiday together, ask them what's new, tell them how school is going etc. Try and find some common ground, maybe musical taste, or hobbies, TV shows, anything!
    And be as nice as possible because they may be feeling the same way as you. :)
    Good luck & have fun.

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  • just ask about them! be genuine... where is it you are going to?

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    • We're going to a movie and dinner.

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    • My cousin, that I'm not even anywhere near to being close with.

    • errrm ok... well i would just ask whats new and see where it goes :) they dating anyone? these sorts of things...

  • Try listening to the radio.

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    • I don't want to rudely control THEIR radio, though. Like if they prefer to have it at a lower volume I'm screwed.

    • Okay, well just fake it and seem interested in what they are saying. I'm EXTREMLY introverted so I know this struggle.

  • Just stay quiet. Nothing wrong with silence :)
    Silence is pretty relaxing, right?

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  • Sometimes silence is okay during a car ride when the small talk is over at the beginning, like the how are you, thanks for driving etc.

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