I have to go on like, a 15 - 30 minute car ride later today, as a passenger no less, and I'm just.. kind of an awkward person.. I absolutely hate small talk, but it's kind of rude to be on my phone and basically ignoring the other person. They insisted on driving, unfortunately, so I'm kind of stuck. It would've been MUCH better for me if I could have been the one to drive us, because I could at least pretend I was hyper-focused on the road and use that as an excuse.
Help me I'm so awkward 😭
Most Helpful Guy
Throughout the journey, certain thoughts will bubble, triggered by the situation (which in turn, is triggered by your conditioning - how you react to certain external stimuli). The thoughts will in themselves, create certain sensations, be it awkwardness, embarrassment, shyness, self consciousness, 'cringiness'. Given you will deem these thoughts and sensations unpleasant and awry, they won't make you feel good, so you will repress them, ie try and avoid them, or act out rashly (ie trying to make conversation, even when it's not natural at that precise moment).
My advice would be to watch your thoughts and sensations, be clear about the thoughts that arise, even write them down afterwards (until you are comfortable making mental notes), because it will the same thoughts that pop up in different situations. Do the same for your sensations. Feel about the sensations, try and understand their essence, their shape, and then start to label them, as best you can, embarrassment, anxiety, worry, etc.
Once you are clear about what thoughts and feelings you are having, you can A) start to understand what thoughts are creating your sensational inner reality, and B) start to rationally think about whether they are justifiable in that situation.
So even on the topic, how you worded it, is elucidating in itself. How can you make a car journey not awkward? Already, you've decided, that 1. The car journey will be awkward 2. That you're responsible for said awkwardness 3. that there is something inherently awkward about you. 4. you should try and fore-control the awkwardness in a given situation 5. you should direct energy towards this end.
Once you see the process of these thoughts creating your consciousness, as I say, the next step will be to decide, if these perceptions are valid. So for point 1, if you decide your journey will be awkward, surely, by virtue of the fact that you think it will be awkward, it will be, because you're going to be hyper sensitive about any 'misdemeanour' in your behaviour, are are insistent that the other person will be thinking towards the same ends (of course, it's probable that they are perceiving the situation entirely differently).
Follow this process to its natural ends, and you can unravel human consciousness, and become enlightened, if you like. You don't have to though...0
Most Helpful Girl
When there is that silence, just enjoy it. Don't dwell on it. Car journeys are easier because you drive past so much stuff you can comment on, bad drivers, road works, traffic lights, funny looking pedestrians, which way to go...2