Do you think guys should have to pay child support for children they never wanted?

Now, I should preface this: I personally would elect to pay child support, even fight for custody, regardless if I came to hate his or her mother, should I get a girl pregnant and she decides to give birth. For me, I will do whatever it is in my power to do to raise my children the best I can. However, I find there is an enormous double standard in America when it comes to this issue.
If the court decides in favor of the mother, a man can be ordered to pay a monthly fee to help raise a child that he never wanted in the first place, and he had no say in whether or not the child would be born. Forcing a man to help with the costs of a child he never had the chance to say yes or no to is a major denial of our rights as individuals (taxation without representation comes to mind).
Again, I personally would do whatever it takes to help in the raising of my children, but I feel that men ought to deserve the right to choose whether or not he would give child support. What do you guys think?

  • Yes, men should be made to pay for child support regardless if he wants the child or not. He made his decision when he knocked up the girl.
    79% (27)43% (10)65% (37)Vote
  • Yes, men should be made to pay for child support, but I think men deserve a say in whether or not the child is born.
    18% (6)17% (4)18% (10)Vote
  • No, men should not have to pay for child support if they don't want to because they don't get a say in whether or not the child is born.
    3% (1)40% (9)17% (10)Vote
And you are? I'm a GirlI'm a Guy

1|0
13|11

Most Helpful Girl

  • I voted B. In a healthy relationship these things should be discussed PRIOR. I do not understand why people don't have common sense. If you know you are having sex then why not discuss any possibilities with your partner. As for one night stands... you kinda should think about these things too! People these days... With that said both people's insights are needed. It has to come down to the financial resources available, how fit they are to really be parents, age, the nature of their relationship etc etc etc. There are many factors that need to be looked at before deciding if you want to have a baby and I think both's perspective should be required.

    But seriously... this wouldn't even be a fucking issue if people had some intelligence. You don't even need to be a rocket scientist to grasp that when you have sex there is always a possibility so why not discuss it! I've never had this issue nor ever will because i don't just fuck around with randoms and not care about my body and it's consequences.

    2|0
    0|0

What Girls Said 12

  • The only person who is making sense here in my opinion is @sp33d

    Getting pregnant is a joint effort. I don't care whose fault is what when it comes to safe sex or whatever, there are no guarantees, and when people are horny, they forget this... ALL the time. Once pregnant, yeah, women are biologically in control. That's the way things are. Just like you get to stand up to pee, and we have periods every 28 days. It's the way it is. So since women have the option to keep the baby, believe it, she's "paying" for it too. It's not like she's on vacation. She is going to go through a physical and emotional roller coaster and that's just during pregnancy. After that, giving birth, and even that puts women at risk. After that, the sole biological provider for milk immediately after birth. She isn't getting off scot-free. The man's responsibility is to pay for what's going on if they are not a couple because the bottom line is, he already knew what he might be paying for before he chose to have sex. The best guarantee is to not have sex, then there is no worry of this.

    I've said this before on GaG: If you can't even envision the possibility of having a child with the person you're fucking, maybe you shouldn't be fucking them.

    2|0
    0|1
  • Sex leads to reproduction, he should have taken the right measures. I think he should pay child support he had a choice and it was to have sex.

    4|1
    0|0
    • So, would you say the same thing to a woman looking to get an abortion: she made her choice to have unprotected sex, so she should live with the consequences of her actions?

    • Show All
    • i could've been stuck in a similar situation. would i want to raise another person's kid? hell no, would i? yes

    • We all think differently and are entitled to our opinions.

  • I would be okay with seeing an overhaul in child support as long as there was also improved sex ed and accessible inexpensive abortions. Men shouldn't be forced to support unwanted children and neither should women.

    1|0
    0|0
    • Inexpensive abortions already exist, if I am not mistaken. The government pretty much pays for it at women's health centers.

    • Show All
    • I have never looked up the statistics, how much is an abortion in the US (on average)?

    • It varies widely depending on how far along you, what state you're in, what procedure is best for you, if your state has a waiting period, traveling, or if there are any extra required expenses such as mandatory counseling.

  • It comes down to this. The man doesn't want the child, the woman does- should you force the woman to abort or go at it alone? For those (men) who believe that women should raise the child on their own, could you look into the face of your future son/ daughter and tell them that you didn't help them financially because you didn't want them?

    0|0
    0|0
    • No, I couldn't. But, then again, I am not every man. Some men don't want the responsibility of fatherhood, just as some women don't want the responsibility of motherhood. Women, however, have the option of not having a child, while men have no choice in whether or not they have to pay child support.

    • That's true! But man have the choice to use protection! If a man doesn't want children, he should double wrap that thing!

    • Or the woman could be responsible and wear a female condom. Or both of them could be responsible and use a mixture of physical barriers and birth control. The point remains is that safe sex is the responsibility of both individuals, and therefore, it's not all the man's fault a pregnancy happens.

  • When people have sex, there are risks. Those risks need to be considered. Does the woman/man trust her/his partner? Ect: Will the partner poke holes in the condom or something? Does the man want a child? (There is no 100% way to not have kids) does the woman want a child? I think the man should pay it because he made his decision when he knocked up the girl. The girl also made hers. They should both deal with the consequences of their actions together. The man shouldn't just leave the child just because he never wanted it. He helped create it; it's his problem too.

    1|0
    0|0
    • So would you say that women should not be able to have an abortion because they made their choice when they had unprotected sex?

    • Show All
    • I guess we want the same thing then... But isn't it already like this?

    • Not really. If a woman decides to keep the child, she can simply set up the child support once she gets the paternity test, and the state forces the man to pay whatever the government deems necessary for the raising of the child. I had a coworker who had that happen to him, and the rate was so high, he had to take on another job just to survive. From day one he never wanted that child because the mom was a cheater and a drunk, and he didn't want to deal with her to the point that he didn't care to even see his son, which she had full custody of. Basically, he had to pay her $850 a month, feeding an alcohol addiction and not feeding a child. Thank God that child got taken away from her, but the impact of him having to work two jobs meant he had to leave college for 3 years, over which time all of his classes' credits were too old to be reused. He just got his bachelors at 27, all because she told him she was on the pill and his condom broke. That's not fair to anyone.

  • I think they should pay it but i also think there should be a law saying that child support money goes ONLY to help with the expenses of the child. I can't stand seeing all these girls with babies dressing like queens and shit but their kids look like they're clothes 10 sizes too small.
    if you don't want the responsibility then don't have sex since thats the only way to 100% prevent having a child.

    0|0
    0|0
    • Women are just as responsible for the unprotected sex, and yet they get an escape route in the form of an abortion. Men however, have to live with the consequences. Yeah, who needs fairness in an equal society?

    • I don't believe in abortion so same goes for girls, if they don't want to be responsible they can keep their legs shut also xD

    • Hey, that works for me. So long as both sides are equal, I could care less about most everything else.

  • Of course they should (and a woman should uf the father has custody). He made the choice to have sex, so he should take responsibility for the results of his actions.

    As for him having a say in whether the child is born, I think it sounds good, but isn't possible. Abortions are a woman's choice, because it's her body, and the procedure is time sensitive (she can no longer have an abortion after a certain amount of time has passed).

    0|0
    0|0
    • That is such a double standard though. A woman can choose whether or not to have the financial responsibility of raising a child, but men don't because of the consequence of being men and not being able to give birth themselves? Both do the same thing: have unprotected sex, but only the woman is given the chance to dodge the consequences by her own choice?

    • Show All
    • No he shouldn't, because the child support is for the child that he helped create. If he didn't want the financial burden, he should have been more responsible.

    • A man and a woman are equally responsible for the creation of a child, but only women get the escape route in the form of abortion, while men are forced against their will to accept whatever harsh monthly child support he has to pay. Do you not see how immensely unequal that is? Women have a privilege in being able to choose whether or not they have to live with a mistake they made, while men lack the right to be able to choose at any point past sex.

  • That's a difficult subject because you'd really have to force some women into an invasive operation, it would creep me out if the government would have such power (i guess police officers would have to drag her down to an abortion clinic?). So guys, do yourself a favour, always wear a condom unless you REALLY trust your girl (and even then you aren't a 100% safe). Without a condom might feel amazing, but 1 night of fun is not worth raising an unwanted child.

    0|0
    0|0
  • Yep he should because both are old enough to know better and that having unprotected sex raises the risks of getting pregnant and if they fall pregnant and she decides to keep it, he should have wrapped it up then or pulled out. Anyone with a brain knows that when deciding to sleep with someone unprotected, they know they could get her pregnant.

    0|0
    0|0
    • But the same argument could be used against women looking to get an abortion: you knew unprotected sex could lead to a pregnancy, so you should live with the consequences. All I am saying is that women get the choice of whether or not to live with a financial burden in the form of a child, but men aren't allowed to because they somehow are more responsible for unsafe sex.

    • Show All
    • Yes most of the time men do and will continue to. And I'm not a feminist I'm pretty old fashioned and by the book when it comes to this stuff so I really don't care about equality. My ex and I have 50/50 of our kids and he still has to pay me. I don't have to pay him though. It's the way it goes.

    • Well, whatever. If you don't care about equality, enjoy the 78 cents for my dollar.

  • I don't think he should. It's not very fair.

    0|3
    3|0
  • Yes. You make 'em, you pay for 'em

    0|0
    0|0
    • But girls don't necessarily have to. They always have the option of an abortion. Shouldn't men have that option, where they can jump out of the situation even if the girl decides to go through with it.

    • Show All
    • So long as it goes for both women and men, then I agree. However, that's just not how things are today.

    • It's exactly how things are. If a man doesn't want to risk fathering a child he should take precautions. If he doesn't then he shares responsibility for bringing her/him up.

  • Yeah, I do. Trust me, I get your point. It would suck to be in that kind of situation and feel so helpless. It also probably sucks to get pregnant in general when you're not ready to have a baby, and then suffer the effects because you don't want to go through with an abortion.

    At the end of the day, the law is in place to protect the child. Do I think it's right for a girl to not take into account the situation as a whole and what the guy wants? No. And for that reason, guys should be more conscientious of whom they stick their dicks into.

    0|0
    0|0

What Guys Said 11

  • "No, men should not have to pay for child support if they don't want to because they don't get a say in whether or not the child is born."

    If she doesn't want the baby.. she can/will ABORT that MF like I'll do a #mission on a video #game LOL i1127.photobucket.com/.../ezgif.com-add-text.gif

    If we don't want the baby. it'll be 18 YEARS OF HELL aka child support #FairRight? HAHA

    Now if you went in a girl raw dog we'll know that'll = a baby 90% of the time BUT WHAT IS she TRAPS ___? Should __ still have to pay then? Any man will say NO most girls will still say YES -_-

    0|0
    1|0
    • "BUT WHAT IS she TRAPS ___? Should __ still have to pay then?"

      Absolutely not.

    • Nigga, what?

    • @Neko_Chan mist has lost this battle >_<

      @sp33d girl doesn't want baby = abort. We don't want the baby child support for 18 years.

  • Yes, if I got a woman pregnant and she decides to have the baby, it's as much as my responsibility as it is hers to provide for the child, regardless whether I wanted the child or not.

    4|1
    0|0
    • Also, this is not a man's place to decide whether she should have the child or not.

    • Show All
    • I will if it ever comes to it, I am just pointing out that women don't have to accept responsibility for their action. They can just go have an abortion, and that's the end of the consequences. Meanwhile, if a woman keeps a child that the man doesn't want, he has to live with that consequence regardless.

    • As I understand you want equality. Well, raising a child is no simple matter. Therefore, if you lived apart, she will have her hands full of work and a handful of money a month is a small price to pay for that. I favor the man's life in this situation.

  • When you put your penis in a vagina, you accept that this is a possibility. So yeah, dudes should be on the hook regardless of their feelings on the matter.

    0|0
    0|0
    • "He made his decision when he knocked up the girl."

      Isn't this the argument pro-life people use against women that want an abortion?

  • I feel if you are emotionally unattached you really have no justification spilling your seed into a woman who are more caring and naturing, then asking them not to do what natures asks of them. Have a child to love and care. I agree I wouldn't want to pay child support but woman (I'm assuming from 8th grade sex ed... so bare with me) well want to have kids and thy are more emotionally prone to it. So yeah we guys are sort of indirectly responsible for well having sex with them.

    0|0
    0|0
  • We shouldn't be women's personal wallet. They like to use their vagina like an ATM if they get pregnant we have to pay.

    1|1
    3|0
    • Yes and yes, but it would be your mistake to not use a rubber.

    • Show All
    • Fairness is not my goal, here. My concern, rather, is to avoid this altogether. Draw cues from a saying "if you want something (not) done, see to it yourself". Therefore, if I mess up, it's my fault and mine alone. Rest assured, it won't happen. It also leaves no room for this semi-blurred s* like "oh, the girl is pregnant, let's be fair about it and waste time in the courtroom".

    • But the women get the choice in the matter while men get no choice at all. The woman can choose to have an abortion and give the child up for adoption. And it's not just your fault alone, it's 50/50 between both partners.

  • Men may not have the right over a womans body, but he certainly should have a right over where his income goes towards.

    0|0
    0|0
    • By saying something like this you attempt to excuse yourself out of the situation. That's what cowards do, offense intended.

    • Show All
    • Oh, no, I didn't get a girl pregnant lol. I am just saying that we have to work for equality for all if we want an egalitarian society.

    • I had thought this was a hypothetical discussion, anyway. Equality is a nice sentiment, but not quite there, yet :)

  • Aren't condoms cheaper than child support? If you knock a girl up then you need to pay...

    1|0
    0|0
  • Yes, it is your kid and you are responsible. Also, your say for wanting the kid ends when you allowed yourself to refused to wear a raincoat during sex.

    0|0
    0|0
    • "He made his decision when he knocked up the girl."

      Isn't this the argument pro-life people use against women that want an abortion?

  • Her legal right, is that she can MAKE him pay child support. However his legal right is that he doesn't have to be involved with her, or the kid, if he doesn't want to. Only thing, like I said, he has to do, if she chooses to, is make him pay child support. It's a law

    0|0
    0|0
    • It's only until the kid is 18 though. After that, he's free

  • "He made his decision when he knocked up the girl."

    Isn't this the argument pro-life people use against women that want an abortion?

    0|2
    0|0
  • I've seen situations where the woman provided the condom. Weakened it a bit then gave it to her boyfriend. He suspected nothing because he trusted her. She ended up pregnant and the guy was forced to pay. Her defence-I needed something to make sure you'd stay -_-
    The guy will always pay

    2|1
    0|0
    • Well, you had SEEN the situation, surely you would have said something. Other than that, it's a sad story :<
      Nothing to say, really, but to always make sure.

    • I've seen it. Not with people I know really well. And what could I have said that would change what the court already ruled?

Loading...