Girls, have you had a boyfriend who fights with his mom a lot?

My boyfriend is really nasty to his mom and it makes me very uncomfortable, of course i've told him about it and he says he will try to avoid arguing with her in front of me but it still happens at times and i don't know how to deal with those situations. It's started to cause problems between us. How do you guys handle it?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • One of the first guys I dated was like that. Turns out he had a lot of pent up aggression towards his mother because he blamed her for his father's absence in his life. :/ It was like he was blaming her for procreating with that type of guy. That's not right. smh That wasn't her fault ya know it's not like he made it clear that he would not be supportive in his child's life.

    I handled it by eventually moving on and not dating him anymore. I get that he had issues but constantly disrespecting his mom and tearing her down was a MAJOR turn-off. There were times where he would try to take the same tone with me and I wasn't having that! He had to go

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What Girls Said 16

  • That's not a good sign, especially if she doesn't do anything serious to deserve being treated like that. Like I get that some moms are terrible, not all moms are completely innocent and they're capable of treating everyone like shit. But if he has mommy issues, he might eventually start taking them out on you. Especially if you plan on being together for a long time and he starts seeing you as the mom of his children (especially if you actually have children together at some point). He might have a problem with mother figures in general, and that's why he might start taking it out on you. Figure out if that's a possibility by looking at the reasons as to why he lashes out on his mom. Are they reasonable, does she treat him horribly? Or are they completely trivial and just plain weird? If it's the latter, you might definitely be in the danger zone yourself.

    How a guy treats his mother is generally a decent indicator of how he will treat women, unless his mom starts shit for no reason obviously. Then he might not have any other option to behave like that, and would never treat any other woman like that unless she started treating him just as badly as his mom treats him.

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    • Agreed! A mom is the very first relationship a boy has with a woman and if he shows her no respect, the woman who gave him life and cared for him for all of his childhood then that is a terrible sign of how he might treat *lesser* women in his life that haven't given him half as much. As a girlfriend or future wife it is very upsetting to hear a guy fighting and screaming at his mother. It's a tell-tale sign of things to come in the marriage.

  • It is terrible for a guy to be "nasty" to his mom. I can see bickering and some disagreements but unless this mother is being abusive and damaging - treating her horribly is a big problem. A mother/son relationship is the first relationship a guy has with a woman, and if he has no respect for the woman who gave him life and cared for him as a child, he's certainly going to have no qualms with treating his future wife badly for any reason. This is really bad learned-behaviour and his dealing with it is "I won't do it in front of you" is silly. This means it's okay, he'll just do it when you can't hear it? There's no excuse for it. I would side with the mother and have a chat with her about it and tell her this whole thing upsets you. See what she says.

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  • I would have a serious talk with him. Because if you plan on marrying him, there could be some major issues. If it's the situation where the mom is horrible and she is doing things that cause him to be that way, then I think it wouldn't be as much of a problem. But if he's just like that for no reason or for silly things, I don't think it would be a good idea to be with him. Because one day it could be you who he is rude to like that. So try to analyze the situation between them and try to make the right call.

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    • Thanks for your comment, i thought the same.

  • my boyfriends mom is a super tweaker and she's fucked us over a few times so my boyfriend and her don't get along.
    they have been in psychical fights and shit like that and i just sand there like
    ?
    if it makes you uncomfortable when they argue then just walk away and get some air. its hard but /:

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    • Thanks for your comment, i shall try that next time.

  • It would be a big red flag for me. A good way to judge how a guy will treat you in the long term is to see how he treats his mother and sister (s) if he has them.

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  • Dump him. Studies show that you can see how your SO will treat you later on in life based off of their relationship with their parent of the opposite gender.

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  • Giant red flag. A guy who treats his mother badly will eventually treat you badly. You want someone with a higher opinion of women.

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  • The way a guy treats and respects his mother is how he's going to treat and respect his woman.

    Tbh, if i saw that happening on a regular basis, i would've been dumb that jerk.

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  • A guy who disrespects his mother who did nothing to deserve it is a red flag. Avoid at all cost in the future and get rid of him.

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  • Oky.. so i have boyfriend who fight with his mother everytime.. ..
    But i think he fight with his mother for me.. cz his mother i think dont want me.. but i dont care cz her son loves me..
    by the way what a fight problem with you'r boyfriend and his mother? .. for you or for what?

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  • It is said that the way a guy treats his mother he will treat his partner.
    Not sure if true, but better not take the risk.

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  • What's the reason though?
    Because I have my mom pressuring me for school and calling me nasty names for coming home with a 60-70 percent

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  • Break up with him. It's his mom. If he can't appreciate the mother that has brought him into this world, how can he appreciate you as a woman?

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  • find the real reason of his angst... work on root level..

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  • My current boyfriend fights with his mom all the time lol

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  • My boyfriend is 23-24 years old and since his childhood every night he sleeps with his mom he says that he loves his mom so much and he feels so proud and in heaven while sleeping with his mom so sinch his childhood daily he speeps with his mom and feel proud and in heaven when he sleeps with his mom. People says about him that he's a huge momma's boy and he can even kill me if his mom will say him to do this. All suggests me to get rid of him run away from him this much attachment to mother is not normal and not good.

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    • Uhhhhh that's really really weird.

    • This much attachment is also not good, right? :(

    • People says about them that 100 percent definitely they're doing sexual things besides sleeping. It's sure that sexual things are happening between them.

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