Have you or do you ever fight against the social norms of how you are supposed to be?

Boys don't cry.
Men are strong and tough.
Girls are made of sugar and spice and all things nice.

Do you rebuke or reject those norms to be who you want to be?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • The question is, are you fighting the norms, or fighting your perceptions of them? Are you fighting because you don't want to be a certain way or because you are and it bothers you? Do you strive to be diffrent only because your afraid your not? I have never faught for who I am, I simply am. Some of it coincides with my gender and a good plenty doesn't. Some of it is old fashioned, other parts progressive. I did not seek it out, I did not try to be. I simply asked questions and depending upon the answers decided which was the best course. It became who I am and perhaps that will change in the future, and perhaps it won't. Either way, I do not try, I do not fight, I simply am.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • I cuss like a sailor. I'm not proud of it, it's getting better I guess. But I still cuss a lot.

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What Guys Said 10

  • I've always been fighting a lot of the social norms. People commend me on my bravery for not caring what people say and doing what I like so after a while, everyone around me knows that I do what i like.

    However it's not things like men must be tough, boys don't cry and all that. It's more like "you're not 18 yet, you can't walk into a bar/casino" and i just go in. Unless i see risk and danger, i will not cross the line and be excessively rebellious, i abide by the rules but if i see a problem with them, i'll bend them to suit my own needs.

    People in my environment know me so they just let me do whatever i want to and it's actually pretty awesome! In school i get to do things and not get in trouble but others will such as arriving late with no excuses, delaying a project, using staff privileges and facilities but i don't do it excessively. I know when to stop and when to take it easy.

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  • I never liked the idea of that I have to be violent and aggressive to be seen as a "real man". That's actually primarily the reason why I'm a fan of gender neutrality... and because gender segregation and this messed up gender socializing creates objectification and sexism in both directions.

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    • I would argue that there is no such thing, gender neutrality. Biologicly speaking men and women are diffrent so we would be diffrent in behaviour. That however is a far cry diffrent then social constructs. There is a diffrence between being capable of violence and being violent. Men are capable of violence, the reason it was such a premium historicly is because the world was so dangerous so men where violent not for violence but as a means to protect (or in some cases provide) for there families and villages. The idea that men are violent is actually a social corruption of this notion. Its a very blurry line I know but to ingore biology would lead to more sever issues (its part of the reason why we view men as "violent" simply because they act diffrent and more seemingly aggressive then women)

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    • @Mesonfielde you said gender neutral so that is why I concluded the assumption of gender similiarity. Though I have never noticed, "you are a worthless human being without a man to give you worth" in fact I keep hearing the exact opposite of never needing a man, while simultaneously hearing them say how women are the victims, literally constantly. That is one that irritates me. Women are the victims and are helpless, except for all the women in history who where leaders, or the shield maidens (female vikings) or the warrior women of the skythians (they think this is the inspiration for the amazonians). Seriously annoying. That and also a woman being told that if she wants to be with a guy or stay at home with children it some how makes her weak. Frankly the complete underestimation of just how difficutl child rearing is is amazing to me, you don't sleep for years and have to guide them constantly so the child doesn't accidently kill itself. I would think it to be quite difficult.

    • @hellionthesage the problem is the idea of "damsels in distress", and how the culmination of many stories is that the female finds a love interest. That is not the only important thing in life. They portray women as if they needed a man to function. But of course, males do everything to "get the heart of" the main love interest, which is also stupid - people are either attracted to you or aren't. If they need to think about it, then it's kinda boned already.

  • Boys don't cry.
    Men are strong and tough.
    I actually like those two

    But everything else I am my own man independent of what society deems acceptable I am what I want to be, not what it wants me to be.

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  • I fight social norms and do what makes me feel comfortable. Unfortunately that is the quickest ticket to being an antisocial guy who bores almost everyone he talks to. However I wouldn't have it any other way (in most ways at least) because when I do meet the rare few who I do click with, it's awesome.

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  • All the time seeing how I'm trans* (agender) myself. These norms are very limiting, and can be very damaging. I submit to you that if we want to become a better and happier society, then we should stop using these social norms, gender roles, and inequal opportunities to just let people be themselves without allowing all of these silly little things that blur our view on who people really are.

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  • i do what i want i dont really fight against anything. but i will say seeing men cry is unpleasant and very uncomfortable

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  • I only reject "norms" when it's appropriate, if that makes any sense.

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  • times are changed all the girls are not good and all the boys are not bad. we should change our mind set. i will marry a girl who understood this :-)

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    • guys can cry but still can maintain the manliness and girls can fight but still she is a girl.

  • i dont care that norms after all i am who i am and will stay like that

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  • Everyone cries, everyone is capable of being strong and tough, and girls aren't all good people

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What Girls Said 7

  • I don't actively fight them, I just don't acknowledge them too much. I guess that's almost a passive fight against them, I dunno.

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  • I sure do! I am an individual and I do my own thing. I was brought up to think for myself and to decide on my own destiny. I don't agree with being pigeon-holed just to conform to society's expectations!

    If people and society don't have expectations, they will never be disappointed.

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  • definitely. this is how i like to live.

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  • sugar and spice... all things nice? That doesn't apply to me.. At All.

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  • i don't really care about social norms sometimes because i'm not made of sugar and spice lol

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  • yes i do.. they are stupid

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  • I always try to be who I am, not what I am supposed to be. And I rarely get negative comments on that.

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