Almost did it but didn't... yet shame?

there was another site like this called IIN when i was younger, I don't know how old but teens probably md to older teens. there was a topic on there that was comon on there... it was discused as normal, and tthat you shouldd do it. i read them, and it wasn't that i was interested, but i was desperate and lonly and i have severe depression and anxiety problems and I've been bullied all my life i actually believed i would be alone forever.

so i considered it , thoughts built up, and i prepared to do it, but at the door i stoped and i didn't do it. and i literally stoped maybe even cried and i prayed and thanked God for stopiing me. but... i still tried... it wasn't like i was was just about to do it like for example if this was a whore, we would be clothed outside the room before i stoped, but it wasn't a whore i think it was way more terrible and discusting.

i tried to forget , make myself think it was a dream, or that at least i didn't do it... it hurts and there are people close to me that i want to get closer to that i wish i could tell, but im afraid they will hate me or not talk to me, the ones i want to date won't date me... it makes me feel beter to think that God stoped me... but other times... i wish my life was like a game and that i could reset... even if it had to be at a game over. and i thinkk that if they found out... id let them end my game. it hurts so bad... but how sould i feel , should i fel i should teell them, llike say i got married should i tell her? the girl i like now would freek out if i did it, but not doing it yetgetting this close... u think she would?

please help... i cantt take it anymore.

Updates:
the main question is , should i be ashamed?

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Stop beating yourself up for something you DIDN'T do. You were having a hard time and made a bad decision, but you stopped yourself before you went too far. I personally wouldn't care if my boyfriend ALMOST did something terrible, and then realized his error and felt badly about it. I would only care if he actually went through with it.

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    • what if it was something crazy like murder or bestiality? not saying one of those are what i almost did but I'm not saying ones not but its the same idea

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    • Well I hope you can put all this behind you soon.

    • thank you.. its been a hard like 6-10 years (sketchy on the date), but i do feel better thank you

Most Helpful Guy

  • I have done terrible things before. I am 100% sure that i am going to hell. BUt as for now , i know that i will never do it again. And that just makes me feel better. I will never tell anyone about it. If u want , u can talk to me about it and we will discuss about it.

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What Girls Said 5

  • I had a friend who had a really bad case of depression after a breakup that got really serious. The only thing that stopped him from taking his own life was his daily trips to a local chapel. It was on one of these trips that a nun saw him crying, and referred the priest to him who got him the help and support he needed. Everyone at some point in their lives will experience a low point, some just take longer to bounce back. Anyone who can't accept this, is not worth having in your life. You need to surround yourself with positive and supportive people who will encourage you to live a full and happy life. Anyone you can't be yourself around, a partner you can't be fully open to, is better off with someone else.

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    • what if it was something crazy like murder or bestiality?

    • Well I wouldn't bring it up on the first date! Lol ' soooo, did I mention I have been to jail for killing someone? Now that's out of the way, are you having the chicken or the fish'?,' She will be gone before you look up from your menus! . I think that when you find someone who truly loves you, she will be willing to forgive/ accept anything.

    • we'll again i didn't do anything, i intended to but realized it was fucked up and didn't, maybe that means i didn't really want to , noone knows but me

  • Didn't you post a similar question that got removed? If you are then the shame you are referring to is on bestiality. This is what I was going to say to you before it was removed. Yes you should be ashamed for almost having sex with that animal. However, you didn't so you should be proud of yourself for being so much stronger. I hope eventually you'll be able to move past this dark time in your life. Personally I don't think you should bring this up to your future SO.

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    • im not confirming that but... how i feel... i just want to... they will remove it if i say it but u know what I'm going to say.

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    • thank you

    • Your welcome. :)

  • I barely understand what you're talking about but I guess tell the girl & you didn't go through with it anyways so don't be ashamed I guess.

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  • I don't think you should be ashamed but also not neccersarily proud. You should tell her I think if you trust her

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  • Be honest its always a good policy 😉

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    • should i be ashamed... i didn't do it but i got close

    • No, there is nothing to be ashamed of. You didn't do anything wrong. I know girls that love guys that has done that a million times. Be honest secrets can destroy the best things.

What Guys Said 1

  • nah, just be honest fam, you get me fam?

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