How many funerals have you been to?

I apologize for the depressing topic, I'm just curious.

I, for example, have never been to any funerals. I've had 2 chances to go, but they were VERY distant relatives, so it wasn't THAT important for me to go, so I decided to stay home. I don't know why, I'm just kinda uneasy about seeing a corpse of someone I know. Plus, I knew most people would be teary eyed, which is understandable, but I find it awkward to be around people who are crying. Plus, the whole cemetery thing...

How many funerals have you been to? Is there anyone else here who has never been to one? I know some people find it weird that I've never been to a funeral.


0|0
16|31

Most Helpful Guy

  • I have been to about 6.

    1. In 1988 my grandma passed away. My dad's mum. I was too young to remember if I went to her funeral or not or even really remember her. This is kind of sad.

    2. Only 5 years later in 1993 my granddad passed away. My dad's father. I am pretty sure I would have gone to his funeral but can only remember about 1 or 2 things about it. However, I can remember stuff about him how he use to come over to our house every second Sunday and he parked is car on our front lawn to I think. The other Sundays he did not come to our place we went to his house so it was like he came to our place then we went to his place and then he came to our place etc etc. I also remember he use to buy us a chocolate bar that he gave us on Sunday. He taught my sister how to make scrambled eggs when she was a child.

    3. In 2000 my other granddad passed away (My mum's dad). He died by slowly loosing his ability to do anything for himself including communicate to us and us having to spoon feed him. :(

    4. Can't remember which year but a while a go now probably around 2005 my bosses Dad passed away. My boss shut down the business for a day and said anyone that wants to come to the funeral is welcome to come. My bosses dad was part of the group. He did not work there but was around a lot and was liked a lot.

    5. In 2008 My dad's female cousin passed away and both my sister and I went to her funeral.

    6. In 2010 a work colleague passed away and I went to his funeral, other work colleagues also went and so did my boss.

    7. My uncle (Dad's brother) is sick and we don't know how much longer he has. I would be nice if he made a full recovery. He is doing much better at the moment.

    On a brighter note my Grandma (Mum's mum) is 99 in November and will be 100 in November 2016

    1|0
    0|0
    • You've lost a lot of people close to you, I'm really sorry! And I hope your uncle gets well!
      And, woah, go grandma!! 😄

    • Show All
    • Well actually sorry I got that wrong it is only 2 of them that live there now but when it was 3 none of them went to go see her. The other two that still live there still never go see her. One of the boys is living in America at the moment.

    • Yes and my grandma lent on of them her car once. She does not drive but she has kept her car for when people come down to see her so they have a car to drive and other people in her city drive it to sometimes. Anyway after she got her car back after lending it to one of those cousins she found a dead cup and tea bag under the seat.

Most Helpful Girl

  • About five or six of them. Each time I have gone I ended up getting so sad and uncomfortable about the whole thing, and had actually decided at the last one I attended that I will not be attending any more of them. That was in 2002 and I haven't been to a funeral since. Thankfully now, my parents and other relatives are opting out of services altogether so I know when the time comes for them, I won't feel the pressure to go - and they're the closest people to me. As for other people, that's it - I made up my mind I won't be going again, and that's just the way it is.

    1|0
    0|0
    • That's probably how I would've felt too if I had gone to funerals.

    • Show All
    • You have one more that you must attend though @Ozanne

    • Not having one.

What Guys Said 30

  • I've been to 3 total.
    The first I went to was for my mom's best friend and business partner in college. He actually became a professional drag racer and my mom would watch him live on TV. He actually died (during a crash) while they were watching him on TV so my parents were pretty shocked to say the least.

    The second was when there was a classmate who's father passed away. I had a reputation of being a drummer at the school so people asked me to play djembe (it's a type of drum) with a band (they were Christian and wanted Christian rock). I didn't know the guy specifically, but I knew the classmate. I have an interesting story about this, but I'll save it for another time lol

    The third (and most recent) was my grandfather. It was open casket, so I basically saw the corpse up close. I knew him pretty well, but the funeral itself/cemetery thing wasn't that bad. The rest of my family (especially my mom since she is emotional) took it much harder.

    It can be kind of awkward going to a funeral and seeing a wax-looking corpse of someone you know. It can be slightly awkward for everyone around you to cry. Oddly enough, I never cried at any funeral. I probably should of been at least a little teary eyed but I wasn't, which kind of weirds me out-- but I digress. The environment of a funeral promotes crying quite well for most people.
    Anyway, the most awkward part is talking with people at wakes or at funerals. You know you should be socializing with people and talking about how they were "a good person" and whatnot, but it is kind of awkward talking about someone who just died... especially when they are lying in a casket within 5 meters of you.

    Ehh, I wouldn't call it weird that you haven't been to a funeral. More like lucky I guess.

    ...
    ... Dammit, I ranted again.

    1|0
    0|0
    • I am dreading funerals so much. I'd probably cry no matter how close I was to to the person since I'm so emotional and cry easily -_-
      Man, funerals seem sooooo awkward, I don't deal well with awkward situations. 😁

    • Show All
    • Woah, at least everything worked out in the end! 😂

    • Haha for sure, I would of felt like a total dick if I missed a friend's funeral in which I volunteered for

  • Four that I can think of.

    You don't have to go to the viewing if you don't want to see them. Not all funerals are open casket anyway. That's somewhat of a cultural and regional thing. Even if it's open casket, you don't have to go up there. Nobody will even notice.

    Also, I've never seen anyone cry at a funeral. Maybe a little teary-eyed but not outright crying. Ignore the stuff you see on TV, funerals are not like that at all. They certainly are not a happy occasion. They are pretty subdued. But people aren't freaking out. Unless it's a cultural or religious thing, they aren't wearing veils either like they do on TV.

    You might even see people smiling, or even laughing. Often the speakers add some humor. It helps lighten the mood.

    You also don't need to go to the cemetery. The trip to the cemetery is generally family members and close friends. Whereas the funeral itself usually has a much larger group. Very often there are people seeing each other for the first time in years, or even decades.

    1|0
    0|0
    • I don't know, my sister went to one of those funerals and she afterwards told me how awkward she felt because of people crying.
      But thanks for the info!

    • I'm sure it happens. But any of the funerals I've been to or heard about didn't have more than people a little teary eyed. I guess it depends on the family and how emotional and close they are. It might also depend on the age of the person who died. Someone dying young or totally unexpectedly might be more emotional.

      From my own experience losing both parents, it was more of a numbness than out of control emotions. I would describe funerals as subdued.

  • Honestly, lost track long ago. I have been to funerals of so many of my family, as well as dear friends. I am including memorials for those who have been cremated. And all the funerals I have been to were either at a church or a mortuary. Never have I been to one in a cemetery.

    1|0
    0|0
    • Did a cemetary one and it was drizzling rain the whole time. Very depressing

  • I grew up avoiding funerals too. The whole "respect for the deceased" thing really bothered me. As I've grown older I've come to realize that we need to go to funerals to support those who are feeling a heavy loss. I'm trying to get better at offering and giving support.

    1|0
    0|0
    • I'm dreading my first funeral experience, obviously it will happen eventually.

  • Lol what are you on about today? A question about dying from boredom then a question about cemeteries and now a question about funerals haha :p.. Bring back your quiz questions please.. jk

    Actually, I have been to 3 funerals.

    My brother is law's funeral.. March, 2008
    My grandma's funeral.. August, 2009
    And my grandpa's funeral.. January, 2010

    R. I. P :)

    1|0
    0|0
  • Only one. It was for my late grandmother, I was relatively young so I can't say it impacted me that negatively since I barely understood the concept of death.

    1|0
    0|0
  • I haven't been to a single one. When my grandma from my mother's side died, I was just four and was at the kindergarden the entire day. I wouldn't have understood what it was about anyway and might have just cried out of boredom the entire time.

    1|0
    0|0
  • I've been to three. All family members

    1|0
    0|0
  • I've been to a ton; I've had to support my mom about 6 times after her sister, brother, cousin, mother, father, and nephew (my cousin) died.

    I've been to a funeral for my friend's brother, and I've gone for a couple of kids at my school when I was a teenager.

    1|0
    0|0
    • Wow, that's a lot, I'm really sorry.

    • It's all right, it's definitely something you expect (if you knew my family you'd understand).

      Ta for the condolence.

  • No problem :D
    For me, about 10 I guess... 4 or so of close relatives (grand parents), and the rest close family members of friends or collegues.
    Going to the funeral of someone's relatives is often a good way to express your friendship :D

    1|0
    0|0
  • Too many :/
    probably 6, some were very close
    My dads funeral, my grand dads funeral, my great uncles funeral (he was like a 2nd grandpa), My friend Jose's funeral (he died during a surgery), and my friend Fabians funeral too...

    so yeah...

    1|0
    0|0
  • Might be an age thing but I reckon I have been to about 50.

    1|0
    0|0
    • WOW! That's hella lot.

    • Yeah when I thought about 50 - It was a lot maybe 20/25 would be more accurate just seems like 50 sometimes.

  • Lemme see...

    My grandma's funeral.

    My dad's best friend's mother's funeral.

    My mom's funeral.

    You don't have to go to the burial, but people appreciate it if you show up at the viewing.

    I've never cried at a funeral. Yeah, it's sad, but because it's supposed to be. If you're not close family, give them distance and pay your respects on your own.

    1|0
    0|0
  • Only one. My Grandfather. Hospital was responsible for killing him. My other Grandfather died in China so I was never able to go since I lived in New York City, and I was too young to have understood what was going on anyways so there you go with my two cents here. :/.

    1|0
    0|0
  • Just my grandmother's funeral when I like 10 or so.

    In 2012 a coworker passed away. There wasn't a funeral just a remembrance at a place he used to frequent with other coworkers.

    1|0
    0|0
  • A lot actually 2 from my family and the rest were the funerals of family members of my friends or my teachers

    1|0
    0|0
  • Grandfather on my fathers side
    Two for childhood friends in middle school
    One for a childhood friend in high school.

    1|0
    0|0
  • several. I've been to some sad ones and a couple that sound more like a tent revival more than a funeral

    1|0
    0|0
  • I've only been to one. He was a friend if mine. Got into a head on collision and his truck caught on fire. He was unconscious and burned to death.

    1|0
    0|0
  • A couple distant relatives and one close on my grandfather.

    1|0
    0|0
  • About 2 does someone dying in front of you count?

    1|0
    0|0
  • 4 - 1 every year for the last 4 years.

    1|0
    0|0
  • I've only been to four

    1|0
    0|0
  • i guess probably about 20... it goes with age

    1|0
    0|0
  • Far too many for some of my racing friends over the years who didn't quite make it

    1|0
    0|0
  • My grandmother's and my uncle's, so that's two.

    1|0
    0|0
  • 1 when I was little for a guy I didn't even know but my parents did.

    1|0
    0|0
  • I can only remember one and dat was when I was 12.

    1|0
    0|0
  • I jave neber been to one. except for 15 min.

    1|0
    0|0
  • 3/4 I guess

    1|0
    0|0

What Girls Said 15

  • Only one, that was my maternal grandpa's. I avoided funerals services all my life, I'm too terrified to even attend any because of an incident that once happened, and it affected me deeply. I wouldn't even dare to look into the coffin of my grandpa's, yes that's how scared I am. And one thing about me is that I cannot stand the feeling of seeing a corpse, especially if it's someone I am very close to. I'd cry if I see people cry, that's how I ended up crying the whole time on the day of my grandpa's funeral. One thing is that he opted for cremation, so I avoided the drama of going to a cemetery. I'm also scared of ccemeteries, because once, I went camping with my friends and our car broke down in a cemetery. I was literally crying and panicking the whole night. After that each time I pass by a cemetery, I'd look away. I don't know, but it's just.. I can't bring myself to go near any cemeteries now..

    1|0
    0|0
    • We're so much alike!

    • I've never met anyone that's afraid of cemeteries and funerals services the same as me 🙈🙉🙊 glad I'm not the only one now

  • I've been to two, had chances to go to 4 but I didn't really know the other two.
    The ones I've been to were my greatgrandmother and another relative, we saw them pretty often (greatgrandmother at least 8 times a year, other relative like once in 4 weeks).
    I knew both of them really well, so I felt like I should go.
    I didn't really knew the other two people, they were people from the same place as I live in, but I barely knew them, so I decided to stay home. For me it just feels weird to show up at a funeral when you don't really know them that well...

    So I only went to two funerals...

    1|0
    0|0
  • I've never been to a funeral. I had an aunt, a classmate of primary school and my grandmother who died.
    I didn't went to my aunt's and to my grandmother's funeral because it was outside the country I live. As for my classmate, their parents didn't invite anyone from my class, and I was too little to go to her funeral.

    1|0
    0|0
  • Zero. I didn't go to my grandfather's because I was too young. I didn't go to my grandmother's because I didn't want to go.

    1|0
    0|0
  • i have been to several funerals

    1|0
    0|0
  • Only one. It was someone my grandmas sister I think. I didn't know her well but I cried at the funeral anyways because seeing people cry makes me cry sometimes.

    1|0
    0|0
  • I've never been to a funeral...

    1|0
    0|0
  • Just one. My grandfather's funeral. I was really young so they didn't let me see him. At first I didn't quite understand that I would never see my grandfather again and when I did realize it, well, I cried a lot.

    1|0
    0|0
  • I can't remember because I was young when I went to funerals so I guess I went to 3

    1|0
    0|0
  • I have never been to a funeral, actually

    1|0
    0|0
  • Not very many i absolutely avoid them

    1|0
    0|0
  • I been to none

    1|0
    0|0
  • Three, but I was only really close to one of the deceased. You'll be fine, you have the memories.

    1|0
    0|0
  • I think I've been to about 12 funerals. 11 relatives, and one friend. One of the worst had to be my 13th birthday, 'lucky 13', where instead of the party that had been planned for weeks, I had to go to my great aunt's funeral. Then just last year my ex boyfriend died in an accident. He was an only child. His mom let out this terrifying cry when they closed the casket; haunting. I have to admit I'm jealous of people who have never had to go. I hate funerals especially having been to so many. I feel like in life, I've said all that I'm going to say good or bad, so there is no sense crying over or making a big show when someone dies. I'm at a point now, where I've told my family, knock on wood, if I ever die like suddenly, I don't want a funeral. Just a direct burial, where they simply lower you into the ground and that's it. I feel like, move on with your lives. I'm dead, and for goodness sakes, don't say things like, "she would have wanted it this or that way."

    1|0
    0|0
    • Your funeral experiences seem horrid, I can fully understand why you feel about them this way now.

  • Sadly, at least 10 and several dozen visitations/wakes. When I was your age, maybe 5-6.

    1|0
    0|0
Loading...