How does one not envy?

I want to be free of envy, being something that I'm not.
Comparing my belongings to theirs, envy towards rich, goodlooking, popular, peoples person.
I always wish for things I don't have, wish I had this, wish I had that, wish I look like him, wish I could fit in, wish I could afford that, wish I could do the impossible...

How do I get it out of my head? I usually lose it when I envy people and their things.


Most Helpful Girl

  • I'm really sorry you feel that way. I used to be the same way but then I realized that it stems from something much deeper. The reason I envied people was because I was insecure within myself and didn't feel like I had anything. I envied their talents and their belongings because I didn't think I could attain those things on my own. Jealousy begins to dissipate when you realize the things you have going for you. Really try to acknowledge your strengths and work on improving your weaknesses. I know everyone has something special to offer the world & you are no exception! :) Just keep your head up and remember that you're here for a reason. Jealousy is a toxic emotion because it can drive people do things they ordinarily wouldn't. Just be grateful for every day you wake up because some people don't even have the basic necessities that we all have and take for granted. Like being healthy and not being in a hospital for weeks at a time or not having a disability that prevents you from functioning normally. There's always something to smile about if you really concentrate on finding it :) Hope this helps and let me just add that jealousy will always exist but it's about honing it in & not letting it dictate your life. There are plenty of things you have that people envy and want & you're lucky enough to possess what you do :)

    • This really helped a lot, thanks.

    • Aww, I'm glad I could help! :)


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What Girls Said 2

  • I do struggle with feeling inferior and insecure, but as a way of trying to move past the feeling I purposefully think respectfully of that person. A forced thought I make myself think is "good for them", and the more I get insecure I just think "I'm happy with myself as I am, and I am happy that they're so __, good for them."
    Its forced but fake it til you make it right? It helps control the jealousy/insecurity emotion for me

  • Better yourself. Do things that make you feel happy and accomplished. Set goals. Work out. Read books you can relate with.

    Learn to accept and love yourself. Self-confidence is a beautiful thing.


What Guys Said 2

  • This is not an easy goal to accomplish but a worthy one. First it's important to know that having those things do not make a person happy. There are many, many unhappy people in each of those categories. People who win the lottery usually are disappointed by that it doesn't make them happy. People envy movie stars without realizing that the lives of the stars is much harder than their own in so many ways.

    Second, it's important to judge your life by who you are rather than what you have. We can't all be attractive, wealthy, smart, etc. But we all can develop those talents and strengthen those positive qualities we start out with. Focusing on the areas we have control over is harder than just wishing to have more. But it can yield great results if you are disciplined about it (another thing we have control over).

  • Realize there is more to life than what other people have that you do not.

    • The question though, is how does one not envy.
      There is less to life if you're as hideous as my self.
      Both inside and out...