Drunk texing/Facebooking?

I have an egregious habit of fucking things up by texting or messaging people on Facebook when I've had a beer or ten. I know there are apps out there that are designed to detect drunk messages due to misspellings, however I can be shit-faced and still maintain sentence structure. Aside from ditching my phone when drinking, what are some good ways to keep this from happening? (Usually my drunken texts are almost theatrical, verbose, often loaded full of sappy and apologetic aspects to -take your pick- and take on an archaic writing approach.) Also, I'm still drunk and wincing at some of the messages I sent last night, so there's that.


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  • Write a note on your phone saying not to do it, then sign your name and in a post script say "this is the sober you talking, trust me, it's not worth it". Then write a note, stick it on the head board of your bed and write on that note "see you dumbass, I told you it wasn't worth it" in appreciation for the inevitable mishap cause drunk people never listen.

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