Is it possible to get a girl out of my league? Do girls care about looks more than personality?

There is this girl i'm in love with but she is out of my league :( When i'am with her, i always open the door for her and am a gentleman and she is always like "awww, thank you". I don't spend too much time with her but all i can say is that she is out of my league.

Is it possible to get with her?

  • Yes it's possible
    Vote A
  • No it's not
    Vote B
  • Results
    Vote C
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Most Helpful Girl

  • What makes you think you're out of her league? And I don't mean if she's beautiful, smart, whatever. A lot of guys think they're out of reach if they want to be with a girl who's beautiful. I want to know what you think YOU'RE lacking to make you think that you're not up to her standards.
    It is often our own self confidence and judgement of ourselves that hold us back from things.

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    • well i don't think i'm good looking enough for her. I love her personality as i think it suites mine too. I think almost have the same personality by being good people and just agreeing on most things and liking the same things. I'am always nice to her and a gentlemen and she always says how there are not that many guys like me anymore. We both agree on almost everything but the main difference is that she is a extremely beautiful and i'am not :( I don't have that much confidence in myself either but when i see her i always make her laugh. But she is a 10 and i'am a 6 i would say.

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    • i'm in love with her. I will try and gather the courage to do so

Most Helpful Guy

  • It is possible!
    It's also theoretically possible that if you were to walk into a wall , the quantum uncertainty principle would mean a few of your atoms may end up on MARS... or if you're REALLY REALLY unlucky , you might go through the wall and ends up on Mars entirely.
    It's also not out of the question that the next mosquito that bites you is gonna give you elephantiasis.

    A lot of things are POSSIBLE but the difference is how likely it is to happen.

    For things like this. There certainly are examples oh sure , there's plenty of them but in converse there's also counterexamples of people of similar attractiveness being together.

    So in the end of the day. Does it matter?
    You like someone , go do it anyway. We have absolutely no idea what the outcome is gonna be for sure even if we do all the statistical regression in the world.

    And now... a word from Shia.
    JUST DO IT!
    DON'T LET YOUR DREAMS BE DREAMS!
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5-sfG8BV8wU

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What Girls Said 22

  • I don't believe in leagues and never have. If I'm talking to you and showing interest there is a reason. I do t go after men for their looks. That is short sighted and dumb in my opinion.

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    • oh alright thanks, well i mean i would say she is bette looking but i do make her laugh and we both have the same personality and she also told me "i wish more guys were as sweet as you are and treat us girls better"

    • Right well this is how I feel. I don't know how she feels friends or more but just don't think in terms of leagues. Even if she doesn't like you if you are what she says I have no doubt someone else just as pretty will. Girls that only date 'hot' guys aren't worth having and will eventually get tired of him when he gets a gut. 😋

    • ok thank you :)

  • It's possible, but unlikely, so don't get yourself too wrapped up in the idea of something happening..

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  • Yes, it's possible. Not everyone thinks in terms of leagues, and not everyone is as arrogant as to think that they are out of other people's reach.

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    • i guess you put it in a good way. Well she is extremely beautiful and has an amazing personality, barely parties which i like but is adventurous. Should i try and go for it?

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    • i told a girl i really like her, but she said she wasn't interested. Any advice.

    • @InNeedOfSexualHelp Nothing else you can do really. Move on.

  • Plain and simple: MOST (not all) people want someone they are attracted to. Just like you are attracted to he (physically and emotionally) she will likely want the same thing. It's just something to keep in mind.

    You should still go for it because some people are more personality oriented and you never know who is attracted to you until you try, right? It's better to know you tried than to wonder "what if?" your whole life.

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  • You should just go for it and ask her out on a date. If she says no, you can move on instead of always wondering.
    Or being too late if she starts dating someone else.

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    • i guess so, but i'am a bit scared to do so :$

    • Rejection is scary but regert is far worse. Picture when you are 60 and still alone because you were always too scared to ask a girl out because of the fear of rejection.
      Don't let fear of rejection stop you from dating while young. You will never get those years back and always wonder what if. Good luck! Hope it works out for you. If not there are more people out there for you to crush on!

    • thanks :) yeah i huess i can try

  • Of course it's possible! There's no such thing as 'leagues' or hierarchy in relationships. Yes, girls do care about looks (just like guys do), but personality is equally important. I'd say just go for it and see what happens.. you never know.

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    • We have the same personality i would say but just she is waaay better looking than i'am. I don't only like her for how good she looks but her personality matches mine which is why i really love her. We agree on almost everything and i make her laugh all the time, when i i do see her.

  • It's definitely possible. This one guy was into me. He was wayyy beyond my league.

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  • "Out of my league" is a very subjective term.
    It relies on physical, social, personality traits.
    And all those traits vary with each person.
    So never say you are out of someone s league :p
    Give it a shot :)

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    • well one day she did tell me that i'am a proper guy who treats women with respect, she also said sadly other guys don't do this anymore. Like i always hold the door open for her and just do nice things.

      She my dream girl aha :)

    • That s good :)
      Really you have nthn to lose, just casually say that you like her and see how she reacts.
      If it doesn t work out at least you know now and can move on.
      Plus a lot of girls prefer nice well grounded guys :)

    • i thought you gals liked the badass guys and so on. I'm a bit of a shy guy but i have a sportsbike. I got it 2 months again everyone says how "badass" i'am but i drive it normally, and go fast when there is not many cars along the road. This girl said she really wants to ride on it so i guess i can ask if she wants to ride then after we can go get something to eat. I think asking her out now would be a bit soon, maybe next month :$

  • Yeah i've seen plenty of girls date guys who are below them in the looks department

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  • Don't worry about her "being out of your league" - just make sure you have great game by being smart, in charge (be a boss lol) mindful, and honest. It's really not about looks, typically. For instance, my ex from years ago was 5'3 and I was 5'5 and also wore heels. I was impressed how he came right up to me at a party and hung out with me by the fire and keg all night. He also wasn't a lap dog but was still courteous, so I never gave a shit what he looked like. His personality was amazing, too :3

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    • i need to be more confident i think, so you say confidence and being nice is they key to get you girls? :)

    • Yea, I'm saying confidence is a big part of it. Just be cool.

    • Ok, thank you

  • It's possible it depends on her attitude really.

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  • I'm in a relationship with a man who is "out of my league." My strengths (I'm loyal, his kids love me, we're sexually compatible) matter more to him than my SMV "liabilities" (I'm middle aged, average looking, not nearly as smart as he is). It all depends on the particular tastes of the woman you're attracted to.

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  • Its proven when you have a nice personality they fall for your looks too

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  • To like at first glance, it is necessary to be handsome. Yet, a man can conquer a woman in many different ways, and if you touch her heart, you will surely have her

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    • We have the same personality i would say but just she is waaay better looking than i'am. I don't only like her for how good she looks but her personality matches mine which is why i really love her. We agree on almost everything and i make her laugh all the time, when i i do see her.

      Everything clicks with her

  • If you're ugly, you're gonna have to try a lot harder though. You have more chances if you're already great friends. But nah, that league thing isn't a set rule.

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    • i would say i'm a 6.5 and she's a 10. I do make her laught, our personalities are a like and we keep convos going

  • Dude im like in love with this one guy cuz he's so nice to me and we used to always hang out and i think he's actually pretty ugly but its personality that matters

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  • Yes, it's possible.

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  • Right now, NO!
    It's definitely NOT POSSIBLE and here is why...
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B-Fj8JkfhP4

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    • No, women don't care more about how you look. But THAT is your problem precisely: "Aww, thank you!" Pfft, yeah good luck sweet guy. :3

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    • cause you engage in convo first lol, take it easy on the perks ;)

    • Will do. :3

  • Damn, dude - open your eyes and SEE
    the mismatches abound
    Have you seen the latest some movie stars have selected as UGHs?
    Cameron Diaz for one Benji? Can't find a decent razor nor hat?
    Many others, most display them on every street corner even if they have no jobs!

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  • What if it's JUSTIN BIEBER?

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  • She's out of your league bc you lack self confidence. Women desire a man who is confident yet humble, has good character and is determined. You can be chubby, but if she sees you're confident in your daily interactions, you're driven to succeed, have a great personality and kind to others... she'd probably give you a shot. If she doesn't though... then she wasn't meant for you and move on.

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    • I think one thing you stated is true. I do lack self confidence although with her i try not to show that. i make her laugh and love her personality. I would say my personalty matches her and we both like the same things. It's just like you said, i'am not that confident in myself, which i have to work on, but with her again... i try not to show it. But i mean she is very very beautiful and that's what kinda scares me cause i dont think i'am that good looking, but when we do hang out for a little bit, i can make her laugh and we keep a convo going

    • Building self confidence starts with taking little leaps of faith. Don't be that guy who helps her get connected with another guy. BE that guy. The worst that happens is she says no, some awkwardness in the friendship until it settles and you both move on. Also... if she says no and the 2 of you move on... you don't know if your pronounced interest is completely dead. Just continue to be a loving friend. There is a season for everything. Sometimes it takes a person to rethink their choices to realize they passed up on something very good for them. That door may be shut but the window is could still be perched open. Best case scenario is she says YES!!!

    • ok thank you so much :)

  • If you want someone out of your league then you better be rich

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    • i would rather keep my money than go out with a person that thinks like that.

    • That's just reality.

What Guys Said 24

  • The only way for someone to be out of your league is if they put you there. So it's not really a league, it's an individual set of standards. So someone can never be out of your league because of looks, social class, popularity, or anything like that. It's entirely individual. The only thing that matters is this one girl your are interested in. If you are not her type, then you are not her type. The only thing you can do is to get to know her, and let her get to know you. Either she sees something in you that causes a spark or she doesn't.

    "Is it possible to get with her? "

    It's possible she may become interested. It's possible that she won't. It's possible that you have no chance at all. Just like with any other girl, regardless of what "league" she is in. You're going to need to do more than open the door for her. That's just being polite, which is never a bad thing. But you need to show interest somehow.

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  • Stop thinking about "leagues," "tiers," and if you are good enough for the girls/women you ascribe to them.

    Why?

    Because you are putting them up on a pedestal that no one except the most shallow and conceited would ever willingly commit themselves to. Women are people just like you:

    Some are smart, some aren't. Some women have excellent common sense, some couldn't negotiate their way out of a paper bag. Some women are prudish, some enjoy getting laid as much as the next guy.

    And then there are all the spectrums in between, complexity as only a human being can fathom.

    Long story short: Be yourself and go after whom you wish. And stop assuming other people are better than you for whatever reason, you are subconsciously limiting yourself by doing so.

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    • thanks, yeah i dont have much self confidence in myself so maybe that is why i'am doing this. She has the same beliefs as me and same personality too, only thing is, she is waaay better looking that me.

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    • You think YOU are the only one to deal with insecurity issues? As girls become women, they have to live and breathe that sort of scrutiny daily, most of which comes from there fellow females. Liking someone for who they are, and not just the wrapping around them, is like a breath of fresh air.

      And, like always, the same thing occurs for guys as well, most of our insecurity issues involving pressure from other men, not just women.

      So be yourself, OP, and let come what may come.

    • thanks man i appreciate everything you wrote.

  • Someone is out of your league, only of you think they are.

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  • There are no "leagues". If you see her frequently then she's not "out of your league" unless she's a film star and you are the doorman at the building where she lives.

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  • Not with that attitude. First off you're putting her on a pedestal. Stop that. She's human. She makes mistakes. In fact, you likely won't even know if you'll truly love her if you hang around her longer than you do now.

    Second, it's okay to do nice things once here and there, but don't be a pushover for her. Don't even think about sacrificing who you are as a person for her sake, and don't you dare be a doormat no matter how much of an awesome person you think she is.

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  • Don't be her girlfriend, or that's all you'll ever be. Flirt with her, tell dirty jokes. Stuff like that. Dont be just one of her friends

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  • Leagues are like MPH signs they're just suggestions if you want a women that's out of your "league" you are perfectly capable of getting her it will just take a bit more work.

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    • nice way of saying it

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    • Nope he's American and he's not wrong they are just suggestions you can go a couple miles per hour higher or lower, and has he said it better to go slower and be more careful.

    • Plus he play's golf with the chief of police and the mayor sooo.

  • I think every day and how lucky I am to have found someone.

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  • leagues are imaginary. if you think she's better than you you will never get her. if she thinks she's better than you, she does not deserve you

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  • Maybe ask her on a date, if she says no then you have your answer. Dont wait to long, it will only hurt you more

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  • Everyone cares about looks more than personality.

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  • I suppose it's possible. There's only one way to find out - ask her out.

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  • Just ask her out, you may be surprised.

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  • Infatuated, not in love with.

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  • How do you know which league you're in if you don't play? Hmmm? Football analogy :)

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  • Why do you think she's out of your league?

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    • really good looking and i dont think i'am at the "looks level" near her

    • That doesn't matter. Make a lot of money, be confident and have a lot of cool friends including girls that are hotter than her. She can't be the hottest girl in the world.

  • Ha as long as your not short like me then she's not out of your league

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  • Girls are willing to forgoe looks for LTR if you have money/ social status. However, for hookups women care about looks even more so than men.

    From teen-25. Women primarily care about guys who are either, good looking, fun, rich, or have high social status (either have 2/4 or all these traits and your good).

    From 25+. Women care about men who are more beta (nurturing) personalities. i. e. Nice guy.

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    • well i'am a nice guy but at the same time me and this girl click and we seem to match in personalty

  • really depends on the girl. if she is super sexy and has a bitch personality you're shit out of luck homie

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  • Yes, it's possible. She's only out of your league if you convince yourself that she is.

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  • yes if she's a hooker.

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  • If you make enough money your looks won't mean squat

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  • Never categorize a girl as "Out of your league". Always put every girl in your league and there will never be a league.

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    • nice way to put it aha

  • They care about money and status more than both of those.

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