I don't know how to put this so I can explain but there is this older guy late 30s who has always been there in my life since I was 16 am now 21 he my dads ex girlfriend brother. He is married so it's not a romantic thing although over time I did develop a crush on him and a have strong feelings for him but I no it would never happen so mainly I just like him being there for me. Would I mean by that is he is always calling me to check am ok we talk on the phone for an hour every couple of weeks and he comes over and see me a lot and he is helping me through college and paying for my rent. He been there through my mum dying and helping me out of abusive relationship and been there through me having a miscarriage and taking drugs and drink and been in the hospital. Me and my dad don't have a relationship and I only have my sister so having him there means a lot to me. Everything has changed so fast in the last 2 years and he been the only stable thing in my life. But I am my last year of college and know after I finish he won't be there anymore. Him and his wife are moving abroad next year. He was waiting until I finish my education promised my mum he would support me through college. I know after he moves away I won't see him again and that breaks me heart. I know I have deeper feelings for him and attachment that he doesn't have for me. After he leaves I don't know how I will cope and I know it's going to be soon. I know I shouldn't have strong feelings for him but I can't help it every time I see him we just laugh and make jokes and everything seems ok for a while. I look forward to speaking to him and seeing him.
How to deal with someone who has always been there leaving your life?
I can't stop crying without him everything a mess and I feel like I can't breathe
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