What's the first thing that comes to mind when you hear a person use the term "alpha male"?

I'm old enough to remember when this term was first applied to humans. At first it referred to politicians and businessmen. Later it got hijacked by the dating world. Any rate, what comes to mind when you hear a person say "alpha male?"


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Most Helpful Girl

  • There is a tendency on this site to equate alpha male with jerk. It isn't necessarily true. A jerk is a jerk, alpha or not.

    Alpha males are strong, self assured leaders. They exude something that makes people want to be around them. They are confident in themselves and their decisions. In the dating world, they are not afraid of saying the wrong thing and losing the girl; they are secure enough to be themselves.

    Like them or hate them, alpha does exist. So does the allure to females in being with an alpha.

    A true alpha never needs to say that he is, he just IS. Wannabe alpha guys throw the word around, but they are all talk.

    Just like the whole curvy/chubby or friendzone debate, the term means different things to different people. Jealous guys deny these men exist, women who have been duped by jerks also deny. True allpha guys are there, they just quietly ARE alpha.

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Most Helpful Guy

What Girls Said 51

  • I think of the beautiful love between two men that leads to the miracle of butt babies.
    http://fanlore.org/wiki/Alpha/Beta/Omega

    I adore when dudebros use it to describe themselves. It cracks me up every time.

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  • Self obsessed asshole, not worth my time. Probably owns an entire collection of fedoras and lacks basic social skills in real life. So he goes around online acting like a jerk so he can brag about what an big tough alpha he is. Pathetic guys use this word basically.

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    • I like the fedora reference.

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    • A friend of mine gave me a fedora for Christmas. I never wore it. At that time, neither of us knew that the fedora was what every "nice guy" with impeccable fashion taste was wearing. It struck me as funny when I found out. When I told the friend who gave me one as a gift, he was a little embarrassed. :)

    • aw hahaha if it was an actual 1940's style fedora that's okay the douchebag "Nice guy" one is called a trilby I think.

  • Tosser - springs to mind. It's a term used by guys who are socially inept with women and who think that starting to behave like an arsehole will be some sort of magic bullet to getting laid. These kind of guys, who are obsessed with becoming "Alpha", fail to realise that just because a women tend to friendzone simpering yes men who think they are owed sex simply through being "nice" to a woman, does not mean women actually want an arrogant guys who will treat them poorly.
    Genuinely nice men who have a bit of confidence and who are not pushovers, are women's ideal. No woman's ideal guy is a jumped up twit trying to use PUA negging techniques on her.

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  • I immediately either think of a classy narcissistic pick up artist who over-analyzes everything related to beauty and dating and worships Leonardo DiCaprio and Dolce & Gabbana models or a body builder type jock whose bro talk I can barely understand and who is very primal in thinking and action. Either way, it's an unpleasant image. Not a fan of "alpha male" talk.

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    • Thanks for stopping by.

    • What about a kinda fusion of the two that also happens to be a corporate executive sociopath?

  • Douche bag who thinks he's some kind of pick up "artist", or wants to be, and relies on emotionally manipulative tactics to try to get vulnerable young women to sleep with him. Or a low self esteem loser who idolizes PUAs.

    Because that is literally the only kind of guy who I have ever heard use the term in reference to humans.

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    • That seems to be the general consensus. It makes me wonder why, in light of the fact that the word is packed with such negative connotation, anyone would proclaim himself to be one.

  • I had only ever heard the term before used in a business context where an alpha male might be the natural leader or manager of the group. This is of course nonsense in the modern world where many women are strong leaders. Then there is the original meaning of the term which is the dominant male in a pack of wild animals. I think some men nowadays like to use this as a metaphor for their own lives or to justify why they prefer to have multiple partners vs settle down with one person. I have also seen men use this as a method of 'bigging-up' themselves by declaring they are an alpha male and expecting we should then drop our knickers. So in summary, what first springs to mind, is 'god, you're not one of those are you?' I would be instantly turned off anyone who describes himself as an alpha male.

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  • I honestly just thought it was a term used to describe dogs. It wasn't til a while on this site where I started coming across "alpha male" posts and found out that's what some people are referring to themselves as. It's absolutely hilarious sometimes.

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  • I think of a cocky drunken idiot that people look up to but some see he's just all mouth and an imbecile

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  • Frankly I think it's a bit pretentious.

    Most of the time these people always make it seem like they're "alpha" themselves, and that being anything but alpha is a very bad thing. Just more genital stroking.

    It's just yet another buzzword used by people who have no clue about how the human mind actually works, and often these claims about "alpha" completely fall apart when the slightest exception occurs.

    These people will claim that all women are attracted to dominant, tall, handsome and rich men. The argument falls apart as soon as someone presents an example of a dominant woman or a submissive man.

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  • I have I only met one guy that used to call himself an "alpha male" and he was the most self absorbed person I have ever met and yeah he was also a douchebag.

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    • Out of curiosity, how successful is he both in life and with women (if that's how he swings)?

    • I know that with girls he is not very successful because he just wants sex from girls and he make it TOO obviously and about his life... I really don't know. I stopped put it attention when I found out that he made a bet with his friends to see if he could sleep with me.

  • People who wish they could run around showing everyone how big and hard their dicks are.

    I think of men who think they are better than others but are living in a fantasy made up by other men who think they are better than others.

    In short: it's really fucking gay, like REALLY gay.

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  • I think of werewolves 🌚🐾

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  • The speaker is dumb as dog shit and a douchebag as well. Would serve everyone a purpose if he could just drown and be "alpha fish food". Lol bring. On the downvotes, you alpha jokes!

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    • Alpha fish food. Funny!

    • Yeah. Grade A quality. Will make the fish all strong enough to break through the nfishermen's nets, this saying their entire school and becomig the superhero of the deep seas...

  • This always comes to mind when I hear that..

    fasstperformancedotcom.files.wordpress.com/.../wolfgg.jpg

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  • when i hear the word Alpha i instantly think of Ware~wolves. D:
    media1.giphy.com/media/MzYRGTXXFsFby/200_s.gif
    s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/.../...2b30c4585f.jpg

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  • simba the lion king comes to my mind. :/
    img4.wikia.nocookie.net/.../Untitled-3.png

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  • "Please shoot me. I'm ready for death to take me. End my suffering."

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    • Sometimes I wish the same thing when I hear certain buzz words.

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    • Since you bring it up, what does "mansplain" mean to you?

    • A man talking over a woman and telling her how she should feel about something. For example, that special guest on Fox telling women that cat-calling wasn't disrespectful or frightening.

  • Honestly, I just think about how much of a hard time people will give them for saying those words.

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  • "Look at me, I'm a pretentious douchebag."

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    • That seems to be the majority consensus. I wonder why so many use it when it carries such a negative connotation.

    • Probably because they don't realize it. Guys who seriously use the term and apply it to themselves usually have equally douchey friends that are likely to be just as oblivious.

  • No thinking. Just vomit.

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  • I think of the animal world. And I think it's a stupid phrase for people to use for themselves.

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  • Wolve packs, macho behaviour, controlling boyfriend, posessive behaviour, fighting for peer power, Born leader etc etc

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  • *smacks head repeatedly on the wall until I die from severe brain trauma*
    That's what I want to do when I hear those terms being used not in reference to particles in regards to chemistry.

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  • Man on top

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  • future husband hopefully lol

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    • That's an unusual response! Interesting.

    • Well I think I see why, people arree thinking of the association of the word to todays world and how people misuse it and not as it is, which is Greek representing a leader, strength, and first... But I am a pretty unusual person in thought process ;)

  • Honestly, I think of a wolf.

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  • A cowboy/old western "hero"

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  • The stereotype, the guy with the muscles on show with limited emotions. But that's not the case, obviously.

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  • Pretentious guys on GAG who want to makes excuses to be an asshole

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What Guys Said 54

  • When used in that way, my opinion of them immediately drops by quite a bit. I usually think of an egotistical asshole who thinks far too highly of himself. I think of someone ignorant enough that they actually think having sex with lots of women makes them more of a man, when if anything it's the opposite. I think anyone who calls them self an alpha male, isn't one. It's all in their imagination, using a score card that nobody gives a shit about except others of their breed.

    If there is such a thing as a real alpha, he'd look at those guys and write them off as unimportant.

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    • I confess, when people use buzz words, I have to fight myself so that I don't lower my opinion of them right away... even though I have been known to use buzz words.

    • I don't really mind buzz words so much. They can be useful sometimes. It's more about how they're used. Like the business buzzwords of the 80s and 90s were just silly.

    • Too true Nearlynapping. Im glad and suprised that so many of both genders realise this here.

  • I wouldn't want to have ANYTHING to do with someone who uses terms like alpha, beta, gamma and other Greek alphabet crap to refer to themselves or others. They are usually arrogant, self centred pricks (if they are calling themselves 'alpha'), or they have serious self esteem issues.

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    • Fortunately, when I was younger no one really used that term.

    • Lucky you! You didn't have to put up with immature, haughty people using these ridiculous 'labels'! :P

    • Am a Zeta male...:):):):)

  • If it's a early 20s dude using it about himself i think the following:
    narcistic dude/player who thinks what makes him a man is being an overal asshole who manipulates himself into every pussy he can get. Oftentimes he'll more or less "worship" the idea of being jacked to the point of looking like a balloon animal. He thinks he can get any girl by being a gym rat, waving his cock around, and being a bully. And he thinks that makes him "alpha".

    The seccond thing i think is "whomever need to say 'i am the king' is no true king". So since the dudes above tends to excessively throw around the alpha statement, then draw your own conclusions.

    A REAL alpha is clearly defined in the animal kingdom.
    It's the leader or the leader mates. It's a person inspiring not forcing, a person leading by example not words. His very behavior makes you WANT to follow him. He has no need to define himself as an alpha, he's more busy leading than to dictate and dominate.
    He has the will to lead, he leads in a way making people WANT to follow him, and he has the strength to pull through. THAT is what I define as "alpha".

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    • Yes, I believe if you have to tell people you're nice, you're sweet, you're alpha, you're charismatic, etc., then you probably aren't any of those.

    • EXACTLY!

      If you need to tell someone for them to see a trait, then you don't really carry that trait.

  • I immediately think of guys who actually have extremely fragile egos, but make up for it with alpha and beta male talk, exaggerations. Especially on here, I immediately loose all respect for a guy who brings this up and just stop trying to reason with them...

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  • I think of friends that I have which are the definition of an alpha male.

    They all have these traits: have a plethora of women to choose from, does not want a serious relationship and is only looking to have fun, intelligent, good looking, an awesome personality, leadership skills, and giant whores haha.

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    • Do these friends of yours actually call themselves alpha males?

    • hahaha no dude, only douches who want be "alpha males" call themselves that. These guys have nothing to prove to people, they just act however they want and do whatever they want. Two of my closest friends who I consider alpha are just incredible with women, it's actually amazing to watch and how smooth they are. One of them was in an open relationship with three different women while he was regularly going on dates with different girls every week and all these women were stunning. He had to get a new bed twice within 3 months because he broke two of them due to "activities". It's honestly ridiculous how easy they make it seem. They are good looking (8-9), but they also have absolute killer game.

    • Yes, there seems to be a big distinction between people who call themselves alpha males as opposed to people who are called alpha males.

  • A leader type character. Dominant. Strong.
    It's only recently that douchebags highjacked it to describe themselves.
    The same thing happened with "Swag" 5-8 years ago.
    Swag used to be widely known as referring to a mans "swagger" the way he walks and carries himself. Then BAM douchbags everywhere suddenly used swag to describe their style in place of "cool".
    I'll just be happy when they move onto something else, because being an alphamale is a good thing, but there's enough negativity around the term right now that it's almost better to avoid it.

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    • Hmm. I think I came across the word after it was hijacked.

    • Probably. Alpha male was first used to describe the leader of a pack of any species in the animal kingdom. Wolves, lions and so on. Humans are animals so it would make sense that it applies to us as well. The term would apply to type A personality people. Natural leader. Strong

  • It depends on how they use the terms. Unlike other people, I don't think there's anything wrong with the term itself. The alpha, beta, sigma, omega labels are just used as way to group together guys with certain personality types/character traits. If it wasn't alpha/beta, they'd use different labels, but the meanings would be the same/similar.

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    • Your opinion seems to be in the minority. Personally the term doesn't bother me as much as it seems to bother others.

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    • Indeed. I wasn't expecting this many.

    • They really hate the term "alpha" haha

  • elderhsquill.org/.../navyseals.jpg

    I think of those guys.

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    • I see. Most people don't seem to see it that way. What is it you do in the navy?

    • You have to be a TYPE A, Alpha male to be a SEAL. Anyway, I do a lot of stuff in the Navy; currently, I'm in Operations and scheduling.

    • I see. Thanks for your service and thanks for sounding off.

  • I think of silverback gorillas, even though I hear it more now in a dating context (which I personally find laughable).

    images.rapgenius.com/...7d18919f4523.800x600x1.jpg

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    • It wasn't so laughable when it was first applied to human men, but it has become that way, hasn't it?

  • The question of the applicability of the alpha male concept to human societies is very interesting from a scientific point of view. I've read some anthropological, psychological and biological articles about it.

    However, most of the time - especiallly in websites like this - when the term is used it's far from a scientific perspective. The first thing that comes to my mind is of a bitter and resentful teenager or immature adult that can't deal with romantic/sexual rejection and feel like the they are entitled to those things. Then they start developing a hatred towards other boys that have what they want and towards women in general. They feed their hate by participating in forums of websites like Sluthate/puahate and come up with theories about women, "White Knights", "Alpha Males/Beta Males", theories that are as scientific as astrology and homeopathy.

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  • A big, stupid, mouth-breather of a man, who happens to have a lot of muscles and looks like an ape--who is for some reason surrounded by women.

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  • It means different things to different people. Therefore, there's a whole host of opinions about the word.

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    • What does it mean to you?

    • Someone who is well groomed, intelligent, socially aware and above average attractiveness. Debating that these types don't have it better off in dating, job interviews, group dynamics, etc. would be absolutely silly.

    • Understood.

  • i think of this movie scene

    media.giphy.com/media/pHb82xtBPfqEg/giphy.gif

    Arnold to me is the ultimate Alpha, as well as following his American dream! and achieving greatness and all the goals he set for himself!

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  • I think of gobby, ill mannered twats who get called (or call themselves) an alpha male but it's just a misnomer in their case.

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  • Just someone that's successful and shows natural leadership... knows how to assert himself and maybe has other assets - a broad physique, attractive to women, wealth that he has earned and knows how to use.

    There's nothing wrong with being THIS kind of alpha male and dating coaches aren't at fault for using it in this way. Real social dynamics are known for advocating this kind of confidence - 'getting in state' - in order to better lead interactions with women.

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    • And yet the term seems to have such a negative connotation with many.

    • Mostly out of ignorance and the way the media uses that term, e. g. feminists hating on PUA nonsense and attacking their false conception of the 'alpha male'. This is whilst ignoring the more legitimate advice of authentic dating gurus and self-improvement coaches.

      There really is no point poo-pooing the label: lots of men legitimately want to be more masculine, more capable of achieving there goals and ambitions. It is not fair for feminist ideologues to villainise them as part of some PC brigade.

      If you must stereotype someone, stereotype the low iq fake tan muscle monsters from Geordie shore. Leave the the tea alpha males alone.

  • A dude that radiates confidence

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  • A guy who is legitimately cool and that people gravitate to. He's kind, confident and inspiring, so people respect and admire him.

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    • The word seems to mean something quite different to many other people.

    • The meaning has been distorted and lost. I think the label is self-applied by jerks and misapplied by the bitter or angry.

  • I think "here we go again..."

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  • Jarheads, guys who think they have to 'compete' with everyone and always try to one-up each other. Guys who have a primitive, caveman-like ideology.

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  • a self-absorbed @$$h0l3.

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  • George Carlin comes to mind https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cSvFYw2hi1g

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  • Hahahahaha fantastic BellePepper!

    i think it shows massive overactive ego when a man claims he is, and major ass licking or just inferiority paranoia towards the man any man is saying it about.

    i think only when a woman uses it can it sound apprpriate, for example
    'he s a real mans man, you know, alpha type'

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  • When I think of Alpha male, I think of a leader. Someone who everyone respects and someone who knows how to lead. This person is fearless, confident, and smart.

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  • It's funny how many women on here are screeching about "douchebags" and "dudebros" and "douchebros" and "dudebags" etc, etc, that talk about how "alpha" they are, when as far as I can tell, that's not what you were asking.

    ANYWAY

    I don't know if any science backs up the concept of Alpha males carrying over from canines to humans. That being said, there do seem to be some applications for the "alpha male" concept to human social dynamics.

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    • Well, I was asking what that word means to each individual. So as long as they answered what it honestly means to them, then yes, that's what I was asking about.

      Thanks for sounding off.

  • Anyone that denies alpha males exist obviously have never heard of Donald Trump, or Genghis Khan, or Mao. All 3 very different men that commanded respect. Trump is the most modern example of that, that guy is a machine.

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  • Dickhead is the first word that springs to my mind.

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  • quite honestly it makes me think douche bag...

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  • I always think that I don't give a shit about it

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  • Dogs and wolves come into my mind.

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  • Arrogant, aggressive, self centered prick with no regard for others.

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