I'm such a mess, is anyone willing to listen and give advice?

I am 19, recently started a new job and will be going to college next semester.
I have had anxiety problems for years and yes I admit I am somewhat of a hypochondriac.

Several months ago I began having tummy troubles that seem anxiety related, maybe even an ulcer. They didn't get bad until a few days ago now I've been having a dull ache and slight nausea coming and going. As a result I am anxious, have barely eaten and I stay up late worrying and sleep in late. My anxiety got so bad that my employer graciously gave me a week to get things together.
I guess due to not eating I'm a bit weak and all of this is making me depressed... I'm just so sad right now I keep randomly crying (no I'm not pregnant)

Over the summer I fell HARD for a guy but he broke my heart a couple months ago and since then I've been trying to keep him out of my life but I always end up seeing him and he touches me so much and it makes me melt and we end up cuddling that night and stuff and I'm very upset now and the only thing in the world that would make me feel better is him but he's a complete asshat who doesn't care about me. He probably just wants me physically.
But I'm over here thinking one minute "next time I'm invited somewhere he's at I'm not going, next time I see him I'm ignoring him" then later I'm just wanting to curl up with him and kiss him.

I'm really stressed out and my anxiety is getting the best of me and I'm convinced I'm going to die of some disease bc I feel weird. I don't know. I just dont.


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