Girl pretended to be dead. Why?

I met this girl online and from the get go she told me she had brain cancer. We knew each other for at least 2 months, I think. We would talk over Skype a lot. Then one day her "friend" contacted me through her email telling me she went into a coma. I was in shock. "He" kept updating me and letting me know how she was doing. Then one day he emails saying she had died. It devastated me. I truly believed she had died. I felt all the emotions that go with someone dying. I tried to forget about it but her "friend" kept wanting to keep contact to see how I was doing. The answers to my questions were always off for some reason. They didn't add up. So I did some research and found out this whole time she had been alive. It had been her the whole time emailing me. The feeling of being lied to was equal to the feeling of someone dying in my opinion. It hurt. I just don't understand it. I can't wrap my mind around why someone would want to do this. I can understand pretending to be dead and leaving it alone. But why the need to always want to know how I'm feeling about it. It's sick in some way. I will never see her the same. What are your opinions on to why someone would do this? Thanks.

Updates:
Yeah it was a girl we talked on Skype video a lot.
I already left a long email confronting her about it. She has not responded ( which I would rather her not).

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Most Helpful Girl

  • This is all I got. Either...
    1. She's a catfish.
    2. She enjoys drama and causing others pain.
    3. She has a double life.
    4. She didn't want to explain why she didn't want to talk to you and figured this was the easy way out.

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    • If #4 were correct why did she feel the need to keep contact with me through the persona of a friend? Wouldn't it have been easier to just let it go after the news of her death? Now when I look back I should have known something was wrong with her. It was usually me who wanted to go. I didn't know how to handle someone with a terminal illness. But I kept coming back because I felt bad. But she developed an emotional attachment to me after our first meeting. I should have seen that as a warning. I was confused on how someone can develop feelings for someone that fast. Plus she cried the first time I met her on video chat. I just felt really bad for her. It wasn't that romantic. Maybe not so much on my part. I would have understood if she didn't want to continue a relationship. But faking your death is so immature and unnecessary. I don't hate her, just really sad because my view of her has dropped to a very low point.

    • Perhaps out of human empathy she felt she had an obligation to check up on your well being. That's a fairly twisted way of thinking though. It's probable that her mental health isn't stable and she reacted this way. Mental illness often doesn't seem logical to those who fuction normally. It's a completely warped and irrational pattern of thought. Some people derive pleasure out of other's sufferings. She just might be one of those unfortunate individuals who's plagued with the curse of instability. I can imagine she's caused you great mental anguish which would warrant your reaction. I would also have a low opinion of someone if they treated me that way. We'll never know for sure why she did it... unless you directly ask her. She probably won't respond. When it comes to human relationships though if it's an obligation to keep contact with someone then it's not worth maintaining from my experience. Time will heal the experience you had though. You'll remember but you'll learn and grow.

    • It did cause me mental anguish. But I would be a liar if I didn't say, that maybe she had some reason to do what she did. There are always two sides to a story. I tried my best to put her up ( she was/is extremely insecure). But I must admit I can be fickle too. But not in a way that I want to hurt anyone. In some way I feel as though she just reflected myself back at me, I have hurt people (not intentionally) in the past. Maybe even worse, I just ghosted them. I did like her but it would be a lie if I said I loved her in a strong way. I mostly felt bad for her. It did hurt but I've gotten over it fast. I'm used to change and emotional intensity. I don't hate her. I just hope she finds her happiness one day. We are not born bad. I just have too much understanding to let anyone ever truly affect me. I have learned something from this. Now I know how it feels when you drop a person. My empathy has increased. So I am thankful for the experience.

Most Helpful Guy

  • She is 21 almost 22.

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What Girls Said 9

  • This is one of those times something is so fucked up that it's funny. I'm sorry lol

    She's either sick or maybe not even a girl. You'd be surprised. Stranger things have happened on the internet. This is why I don't like "meeting" people online. Because you never know what's on the other end.

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  • You know how teenagers are these days, they are flakey and prankish lol. Why you keep buying her buullshit?

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  • A cry for attention in a sick way. The things people do for attention

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  • Psychobitch

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  • it sounds like she's a psycho

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  • I would assume it's someone that's seriously mentally ill. She might even be believing her own lies.

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  • She's sick in a different way... Mentally. Not cancer.

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  • What a #&$&=&)*@%]> b*tch!!! Please tell me she is just a teenager! Yep, man, she is looking for attention she is so desperate for attention that she went this far. Don't trust anyone online, man, just don't!!

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  • Attention, or it was just a sick game to her.

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What Guys Said 6

  • sounds like a newish version of catfishing.

    frankly i wouldn't even bother trying to talk to this chick. that behavior is pretty much the behavior of a borderline sociopath

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  • It is sick. Sometimes you can't explain psycho. I wouldn't hurt yourself thinking about it and cut off contact with this person.

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  • She's probably a crazy psycho that maybe wanted to know if you cared about her at all, especially after she supposedly/allegedly died. Maybe she became obsessed with you?

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    • Probably. She did need a lot of validation. But I don't think she is obsessed. She hasn't emailed me ever since I found out.

    • Then leave her be. Maybe she realized how crazy she was and is reflecting on such.

  • Maybe it's not even a girl? Maybe some troll?

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  • Wow... That BITCH... She must be as crazy as a shithouse rat...

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  • I think she is mentally ill.

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