Do you think that parents that "force" their children not to date certain people because of ethnicity or religious backgrounds are oppressors?

I`m surprised by the amount of parents that emotionally black mail their adult sons/daughters not to date certain people, making them unhappy in the process. Some even threaten to kick them out if they brought home a insert__________?
Some are inside the closet their entire life becasuse of repercusions from society.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Of course they are oppressing, but that doesn't make them necessarily wrong. Your parents may be more acutely aware of problems that you may have with this other person and they want to protect you.

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    • I meant on grounds of difference not because they are bad to me its like saying hey Ron you can't date that guy because their family support X sports team and wear their colours

    • Well, that is objectively stupid, but for many people, what team you support is a big deal because, over generations, rivalries are established. In this scenario, each team is "at war" with its rival and each game between the teams is a battle. Often, your team may have lost in a very noteworthy way like bad officiating or a cheat or sneaky play by the rival team. People remember this stuff for decades and they don't forgive.

      Personally, the Miami Fucking Dolphins can die. If my daughter became the girlfriend of a Dolphins fan, I wouldn't ban it, but say to her "He's obviously fucked in the head. You don't want defective mutant children with him, do you?"

Most Helpful Girl

  • I guess it is a form of oppression when it gets that overwhelming and dramatic. It is also is very common and gets jumbled up with normal parenting. I think some degree of emotional blackmail is pretty normal. They're emotionally controlling, because they think they are doing what's best for their child and know it may be their only way of having it the way they envisioned since legally they have no control. I know my parents wouldn't want me to date outside my religion though I can get away with whatever race. I am now choosing not even to bother pursuing a guy of a different religion for both his and my sake and my family's sake.

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What Guys Said 23

  • Yes, but you'd also be probably be surprised by how prevalent it is, and also, how subtle. Most of the time, it wouldn't be mentioned, but you'd get a sense that the person wouldn't be pleased, and most people don't have the courage to go against the grain. We all subconsciously rank people on the basis of their ethnicity, socio-economic status, religion etc.

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  • If they force and threat, yes, that's what oppressors do. They don't have to accept the person in their house, but dating is a personal decision and should be respected.

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  • Yeah I think it's wrong. They should be able to date whoever they want no matter their race or religion as long as they're a good person. It's the child's life not theirs. It'd be messed up to tell my future kids they can't date some because their Buddhist or because they're Asian, it's petty. Then you got those who act like they respect people for their differences in beliefs, but don't want their children dating much less marrying said people. This is why a lot of kids become Rebels and do shit to piss the parents off intentionally.

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  • Parents have the right to try to persuade their children to follow guidelines acceptable to the parents. Children have the right to reject those guidelines. It is very easy to act as if you have the moral high ground in arguing against the parents' position but that accomplishes nothing except adding to the apparent rift.

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    • it its the kids happiness in the line should that be sacrificed so the dad can keep his position in societies eyes

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    • if they are doing it to keep up appearances then Im judging

    • most of the time the parents are right , the kids think with their heart not brain and end up in big shit , trust me love is not enough some other things will matter in a marriage , and parents know this they've seen it happen so when they act like assholes because their kid is marrying someone who they dont like its because they know how its gonna turn out eventually.

  • Yes and no, it makes perfect sense to avoid certain ethnicities or people from certain religious backgrounds; as ethnicity and religion is bound to a particular culture that you might not want to have your child get engaged in, especially if they aren't informed enough about the consequences and risks.

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    • suppose the child is willing and they like it actually wouldn`t it be oppression?

    • Well parents just want what's best for their kids; and it's not something messed up like permanently mutilating their penises to make sure they can't masturbate 13 years later. They just ask them not to actually date a particular person associated with a particular culture.

      Would you let your kid date someone who has joined a suicide cult? No? This is the exact same damn thing, except because more people have joined the cult, now it's called a religion. Did you know that you can literally be stoned to death if you join Islam and then leave and become an "apostate"?

    • So no, I don't think it's oppression, I think it's "looking out for your children".

  • No, they're doing a proper job at protecting their children.

    I personally would make sure my children do not have any connections with muslims.

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  • They're just sick...
    #toxicparents

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  • I always encouraged my daughter to date whoever makes her happy, no matter the race or gender. She's now happily married.

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  • Depends. If I had a kid and they were dating some mafioso druggie I'd have to have a word with them.

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  • That is child abuse in my eyes

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  • I've seen it happen over and over , love is not enough just because you love someone doesn't make it the right choice and most parents know this , they dont want to be the assholes but they have to in order to protect their kids sometimes, they know that person from that certain background is going to cause them trouble in th future if not him/her then the family and relatives, its easy to overlook these kind of things when you love someone but if you think with you're brain you'll see that your parents are right and they're more experienced and have their own reasons that are right most of the times of why they are oppressing you , too much freedom is not necessarily good because a 50 years old guy knows better than his 25 years old son.

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  • it's wrong and I would never accept that. but luckily my parents are not like that

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  • Its certainly not something I'll do to my child but okay there are some coward controlling people around.

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  • I think social justice warriors like you who try to shove your propaganda, point of view, and stupid fairy tales down people's throats are some very annoying wannabe oppressors!

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    • That is my point of view and want to see how many people agree with me

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    • you are paranoid get a reality check the white race dying out BS has been debunked

    • I'm not paranoid, just proud.
      Don't try to talk down on me because i'm not a spineless piece of sell-out shit, like too many cowardly ass-kissing whites seem to be lol

  • Not at all. I made a deal with them. They specified race/religion, but don't care who she is beyond that. I'm perfectly fine with that.

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  • their house their rules.

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  • Yeah. I fucked a Muslim chick once and she said if her parents found out they'd kill us both, so y'know. That's not good. Apparently Muslims can't date or fuck white guys, it;s not allowed. Seems racist to me.

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  • I notice this problem happens mostly to white women lol.

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  • Absolutely.

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  • It's very common amongst all races who live in multicultural societies.

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  • Except one religion , I am against such mentality.

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  • They're smart parents, they don't want thousands of years of ethnicity destroyed

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  • No its perfectly natural for people to keep their DNA pure and protect their culture to hand it on to the next generation.

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What Girls Said 6

  • I can understand why people want their kids to date someone of the same religion/culture etc. because it probably saves hassle in the long run. For example, if you're Christian, you'd probably want to marry another Christian 9yes that's vague but go with it) because you'll probably have the same ceremonies/background/ideas about your lives. And it makes it easier for your fmaily to connect perhaps.
    But if you you blackmail someone into it, that's not okay.

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  • You can only be blackmailed if you allow someone to blackmail you.

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  • I'm actually worried about this. I don't know if my parents have problems with non whites mostly because we've lived in almost exclusively white places my whole life so I don't know how they'd react if I dated someone outside my race

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  • That sounds like my parents

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  • I don't think they are oppressors they are just protecting their child.

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    • how come?

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    • They create a lot of problem. White parent don't want their child to date black people and black people don't want their child to date white people. It's the same everywhere. We are just so different by culture and all he will just be troublesome and create problem.

    • but wouldn`t it be fair to say some families are trouble instead of race take italians they are different from germans in culture

  • I'm in that boat and it sucks. I'm dating a Muslim Arab guy and he refuses to introduce me to his dad, on the basis I'm white and his dad would throw a fit.

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    • yeah it sucks parents dictating for their kids overlooking their happiness hope it will work out for you

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